


Blind

by LadyOfGlencairn



Category: Arrow (TV 2012)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-14
Updated: 2015-03-13
Packaged: 2018-01-15 16:45:42
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 30
Words: 71,046
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1311970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyOfGlencairn/pseuds/LadyOfGlencairn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Accepting that Oliver and Sara are together, Felicity buries her feelings for him and moves on with someone else. Meanwhile, Oliver thinks he's happy until the one woman he never thought he'd want is suddenly the only thing he can think about. Set post 2x14. Story ends Olicity, but has an alternate ending with Felicity and Adam Donner.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This story has an alternate ending and splits as follows:  
> Olicity fans can read up to Chapter 27.  
> Alicity fans can skip Chapters 25, 26 and 27 and continue reading from Chapter 28-30.

Not only was Sara Lance back in Starling City, Felicity thought viciously as she kneeled down yanking out bits of fried cable from her toasted server, she was also back in Oliver's life. As his new girlfriend, no less. She wasn't quite sure what the appropriate term would be to explain the relationship between her boss and the woman he'd betrayed his ex with, but seeing as they were clearly sleeping together and being all touchy feely in public, that probably meant that they were going steady.

Going steady? No one even said that anymore. Annoyed at her train of thought as well as the juvenile expression she reached both hands into the rack in front of her and pulled hard. Not expecting the broken piece of hardware to come out so easily, her heel slipped on the tiled floor and with a distinctly unladylike yelp she found herself sprawled on her back with bits of microchip flying in all directions.

"Great!" she muttered as she moved to sit up, her posterior still smarting. Fed up with herself, with Oliver, with Sara, with the entire situation, she tossed the cables across the room, feeling marginally better when she heard the satisfying thud it made as it hit the opposite wall.

"Whoa!" she heard Diggle say as he rounded the corner.

Felicity's eyes widened and guilt set in. "Dig! I'm so sorry. I…err…was aiming for the err…bin," she ended lamely, grateful that Diggle didn't mention that she had sent the hardware flying in the opposite direction to the trash receptacle.

He walked over, a concerned look on his face. He crouched down beside her. "You okay?" He extended a hand and helped her up. She automatically reached to pull her cream and black print skirt down over her thighs.

"Yeah, dandy," she replied with more heat than necessary, smoothing her ponytail back into place.

She turned her back to him while she worked efficiently, brushing a stray strand of hair behind her left ear, all the while staring at the blank terminals before her. Since the explosion at the foundry the night before, everything was in complete and utter disarray. This was the umpteenth time she'd had to rebuild her computer network and infrastructure from scratch after some or other disaster had struck their vigilante hideout.

Diggle slowly turned her to face him, an indulgent smile on his face. Gently, he pushed her back into her black chair. "Level with me. What's going on?"

She didn't want to talk about how confused her feelings for Oliver made her or how jealous and insecure she'd felt about her role in his life from the moment Sara had come back onto the scene. So instead, she strayed to a safer topic.

Sighing heavily, she relaxed into the chair. "Look at this place," she gestured to the shattered glass, bits of carbon fiber and other materials strewn all over the counters and floor space. "Do you have any idea how long it's going to take me to put it back to rights?" For some absurd reason she felt tears prickle behind her eyes. Taking a deep breath she swallowed in an attempt to gain some measure of control over her emotions.

Diggle didn't take his eyes from her as he moved beside her and leaned back against her desk. "We're all here to help you. You're not going to have to do any of this alone. I know I'm not up to your standards, but Sara-"

"Not you too!" Felicity burst out, throwing her hands in the air. "Yes, I know. Sara Lance is a miracle worker. She kicks ass, she's practically a surgeon and guess what else? She just happens to be a genius around computers too." She pushed her spectacles back up the bridge of her nose. "Why do I bother to hang around here, these days? I should in fact spend more time doing my actual day job." She quirked her head to the side, her sarcasm unmistakable. "Oh wait, maybe Sara could take that over too. Who knows? She might be as good at that as she is everything else around here."

Silence greeted the end of her tirade. Oddly deflated after going off on a tangent, Felicity felt a tear spill over onto her cheek. Angrily, she swiped it away.

Diggle looked momentarily taken aback. "Felicity," he said softly. "You're not replaceable. Not to me and certainly not to Oliver."

Felicity didn't say a word. She just stared down at her hands. That wasn't the impression she'd been getting lately.

"We would never have achieved a smidgeon of what we've managed to without you. Going forward, we need you as much as we ever did." Diggle laid a hand on her shoulder encouragingly.

Felicity felt like a fool. "Really? Because all I've managed to do recently is get this place blown up," she said miserably.

"Hey," Diggle said, raising her chin so she could meet his eyes. "That was not your fault. None of this happened because of you."

"But-"

He shook his head. "No. It happened and there was nothing you or me, or Oliver, or even Sara," he said the name while looking her straight in the eye, "could have done to prevent it. Thank God that no one was hurt."

Felicity gave Diggle a half-hearted smile. "Thanks."

Footsteps came rushing down the stairs. Twisting in her chair, she saw Oliver walking toward them, closely followed by Sara. The smile he gave the other woman made Felicity's stomach plummet to her feet. She needed to get out of there. It was one thing to work with them in a professional capacity, quite another to see the obvious affection between them. Suddenly it was too much.

Abruptly, she stood. "I need to get some air," she said to no one in particular.

Oliver focused his gaze on her, stopping in front of her chair. "Are you okay?"

The concern in his voice was almost her undoing. He reached a hand out, but she sidestepped. "Fine. It's going to take a while to get everything patched up again," she said, reaching for her coat. "I'm a little tired so I'm going to head home. I'll get to work on fixing all this in the morning."

"That's not nec-"

She reached for her purse and turned to face him, ignoring whatever he was planning to say. "See you tomorrow."

He stared at her, his eyes searching hers. Afraid he'd see too much, she turned away, muttering a hasty goodbye to Diggle and Sara as she hurried out of the building.

"Did I miss something?" Oliver asked Diggle as he watched Felicity flee. Sara was busy picking up arrows from the floor, her position close, but not close enough to hear them talking.

Diggle looked at his friend and shook his head. "I'd love to tell you, man. But I think you're going to have to figure this one out on your own."

"What are you talking about?"

"Open your eyes, Oliver. Look around. There are other people here too. It's kinda sad that I need to remind you of that."

Slapping the object of Felicity's obvious affection sadly on the shoulder, Diggle walked away, leaving a dazed and confused Oliver in his wake.


	2. Chapter 2

Oliver had spent most of the evening trying to figure out what could have happened to alter Felicity's mood so drastically. She was generally pleasant and accommodating, her peculiar quirkiness one of her most endearing qualities.

Having managed to salvage most of his equipment, he was in the process of stowing them away while he pondered his IT genius's frame of mind. He knew Felicity was sensitive and that she took pride in her work and her role in his team. Granted, he hadn't really checked in with her since Sara's permanent arrival back in Starling City, but he'd been really wrapped up in other things – his discovery of Thea's true father, Laurel's alcohol abuse and integrating Sara back into her family to name just a few. That was apart from his commitment to help Roy learn to control his new strength and all the demands of being CEO. Besides, he didn't think his lack of attention would be what had set Felicity on edge.

It was probably the explosion and the massive amount of work that lay ahead of them in order to get all the equipment back in running order. He'd tried telling her that Sara would gladly help her, that she wouldn't need to do everything alone, but she hadn't even let him finish.

Shaking his head, he resolved to talk to her when he saw her the next day. Finishing up, he closed the crate he was temporarily stowing his bow in just as he felt a pair of hands slide around his waist to embrace him from behind.

Smiling, he turned to face Sara. Her blond hair was parted down the middle and fell in soft waves around her face.

"Why so pensive? You've been sporting a frown for the last half an hour," she said, reaching up to give him a brief kiss on the lips.

Oliver wrapped his arms around her. "Just thinking about Felicity. She seemed a little upset when she left earlier."

Sara shrugged. "I'm sure she's just sifting through everything that happened last night. She's cutesy and sweet, but she doesn't strike me as a shrinking violet. She'll be fine."

Frowning, he noted her flippant tone. For some reason it grated on his nerves. "Felicity isn't prone to mood swings. Something must be bothering her."

She must have picked up on his annoyance. "Hey, I wasn't being condescending. If it bothers you, then you should talk to her about it."

Relaxing slightly, Oliver changed the subject. "You working tonight?" Thea had recently hired Sara as Verdant's bartender.

Seemingly relieved at the shift in topic, she smiled, "Yes. Which reminds me, I'd better get upstairs before your sister fires me. It would make a really bad impression if I arrived late on my first day." She hesitated slightly. "See you later?"

Oliver smiled reassuringly. "Yeah."

With a nod, Sara kissed his cheek and headed upstairs, but not without noticing that he seemed a million miles away.

* * *

The following morning Felicity popped into Big Belly Burger to grab a coffee before heading to work. It would be a long day. She had loads of work to do at Queen Consolidated before heading over to the foundry to get started on the computer repairs.

After a good bout of crying the night before, she felt better, more in control. Who Oliver chose to date was none of her concern. She had a job to do and from now on, it was best that she focussed on that and nothing else. She wasn't his type anyway. In the long run, pegging her hopes and dreams on him would only result in more hurt feelings. Resolved, she placed her order and shrugged out of her coat, taking a seat at the counter while she waited.

"…is not going to work! I need that server back up within the hour!" Felicity glanced around to see where the frustrated words were coming from.

A tall guy in an immaculate navy suit took a seat beside her as he caught a waitress's attention. Ordering his beverage of choice, he slammed his mobile onto the vinyl surface in front of him.

"Dammit!"

Felicity winced. "You probably shouldn't throw your phone onto the counter face down. That particular model has a pretty trashy screen. I wouldn't be surprised if you've just cracked it."

A pair of clear blue eyes turned to look at her. Felicity swallowed and as usual, said the first thing that came to mind. "Wow, you're attractive." Blushing, she froze. Thick brows rose in amusement. "I-I mean not like attractive attractive." Realising the insult, she back-tracked. "You  _are_ attractive; I'm just not saying that  _I_ find you attractive." She closed her eyes and mentally berated herself. "What I mean is…oh nevermind." Lowering her voice and hunching forward in an attempt to make herself as small as possible, she whispered, "I'm just going to shut up now."

The man beside her smiled and shifted his eyes to his phone. Lifting it from the table he turned it over and noted the cracked screen. "You were right." He showed her.

Immensely relieved that he chose not to comment on her verbal diarrhoea, she stared at it. "Like I said, not the best model."

Shaking his head, he sighed. "Government issue. Bound to be crap."

Felicity relaxed. "You're the District Attorney."At his questioning glance, she explained. "You worked the Moira Queen case. I remember you from the TV." Actually, she remembered a lot more about him considering that Oliver had wanted to deck the guy a few times for merely doing his job. She extended her hand to him. "Felicity Smoak. I work for Queen Consolidated."

He nodded and shook her hand. Felicity noted his firm grip. He really  _was_  quite good looking. Chiselled jaw, straight nose, wide mouth with perfectly straight teeth and a well groomed head of thick brown hair. He was different to Oliver. He was more-  _No_! She would not sit there comparing another woman's boyfriend to every man she met.

"Adam Donner."

Her coffee arrived so she took the opportunity to do something with her hands by adding some sugar. "So, your server is down?"

He grimaced. "For the last 24 hours. There's some virus that IT can't seem to kill. What the hell do we pay these people for?" The last bit he seemed to ask himself.

Genuinely smiling for the first time in days, Felicity offered, "Maybe I can help?"

He looked at her doubtfully. "Unless you've got some hidden talents, I think we'll need more than a pretty face."

Felicity knew that she should have felt insulted, but she rather liked the idea that he found her attractive.  _At least someone does._  Her ego enjoyed the boost even if she wasn't sure if he really meant it. "You're not supposed to judge a book by its cover, Mr Attorney." She wiggled her purple tipped fingers at him. "These babies can work miracles."

He chuckled and she found that she liked the sound. It felt nice to talk to a man other than Diggle and Oliver.

"Alright, I'll bite. Care to explain?" He took a sip of his black coffee.

"I'm QC's top IT asset. Of course, you don't have to take my word for it. You're welcome to contact my superior." She flashed him a cheeky smile.

Amused, Adam asked indulgently, "And this person would be…?"

"Oliver Queen," came a familiar voice from behind her. Felicity whipped around. Oliver was standing there, dressed impeccably in a grey business suit wearing the most ferocious scowl she'd ever seen.


	3. Chapter 3

Oliver was furious. He'd arranged to meet Sara for breakfast before heading to the office and hadn't expected to see Felicity sitting cosy with the man who'd tried to send his mother to jail. When he'd walked in they'd been all smiles, their bodies leaning toward one other as though they were exchanging confidences. If he hadn't known better, he would have assumed that Felicity had been flirting with the DA. Irrationally annoyed at the thought, he swept it aside.

Glancing at her, he was rather pleased at the surprised look on her face. Moving along, he shifted his attention to Adam Donner. He was an arrogant, egotistical piece of work. It didn't take much to know that the guy thought too highly of himself. Clearly he had no self esteem issues.

Oliver's eyes locked with the attorney's, his cool and calculating, the other man's slightly mocking and insolent. That alone made him want to ram his fist through the DA's pretty face.

"Donner," he said by way of greeting.

"Queen," came the expected acknowledgement.

Clenching his fists reflexively, he looked at Felicity. "Can we talk?" he asked with a deceptive calm.

She'd regained her composure while he'd been taking Adam's measure. "Not at the moment."

Oliver couldn't hide his astonishment. "Felic-"

"I think the lady said no," Adam chipped in, turning in his chair to face Oliver.

He felt a crushing desire to wipe the smug smile off the other man's face. "I don't recall asking  _your_ permission."

Adam raised an eyebrow. "Correct. You asked her. She said no. Did you miss that part?"

Felicity just watched them, her eyes swinging from one to the other nervously. "Look, I'll see you at the office," she said to him.

Oliver took a step closer to Adam, not exactly sure what he was planning to do when he felt a hand settle into the crook of his arm. Sara was standing beside him, clearly concerned. "Oliver?"

Felicity gave them what looked to be a beaming smile, but somehow he sensed that it wasn't completely sincere. His eyes narrowed.

"Enjoy your meal," she quipped.

Steering him away, Sara sat down at a corner table forcing him to do the same. Staring daggers at the couple sitting at the counter, Oliver didn't hear Sara speak until she waved a hand in front of his face. "Who's that guy?"

Oliver dragged his gaze across the room to meet hers. "Adam Donner. The DA."

Sara's eyes lit in recognition. "Laurel's ex boss?"

"One and the same."

"So what's Felicity doing with him?" she asked curiously.

Gritting his teeth he looked back at the smiling pair, his gut tightening unpleasantly. "I don't know."  _But I plan to find out._

* * *

Adam ignored the hole burning into the back of his head. "A pretty over-protective boss you have."

Felicity waved a hand dismissively. "Ignore Oliver. He doesn't like you because of his mother, but that's not completely unexpected," she replied frankly. Then, "Oh, I'm sorry, that was a horrible thing to say." She looked slightly mortified which made him smile.

She was pretty in a sweet, wholesome, girl-next-door kind of way. She was also rather refreshing. He didn't know many people who said exactly what they thought without it coming off as mean-spirited. He could appreciate her brand of honesty.

"That's okay. I wouldn't have expected anything less. Had our positions been reversed, I guess I would feel the same way." Which was true. He understood Oliver's aversion and it didn't bother him in the least.

He watched her wrap her hands around her coffee cup, absorbing its warmth. "That's rather gracious of you."

Shrugging, he replied, "I'm generally the bad guy. In my line of work, I can't afford to sit on the fence. If I have an opinion on something, everyone knows about it. That doesn't make me very popular, but I've learnt not to take it personally."

She looked at him curiously, her blue eyes large behind her spectacles. "You don't mind that people hate you?"

He sent her a teasing grin. "Hate's a strong word. I prefer dislike." She looked unconvinced that it was somehow a better alternative. "It comes with the territory. Besides, I choose to see it as a compliment. Must mean that I'm doing my job right."He watched her closely and then asked rather spontaneously, "Why don't you dislike me?"

She looked startled by the question. "Who says I don't?" she replied humorously.

He acknowledged her response with an up-tilt of his lips.

Grinning, she continued, "I have no reason to. I understand that you were merely doing what was necessary. I can't fault you for that." She took a tentative sip of her coffee. "Also, I don't actually know you. You may be very different to what your public persona suggests."

Blonde, blue-eyed and petite, Felicity definitely wasn't his usual type, but for some reason he instinctively liked her. A little uncomfortable under her scrutiny, he changed tack. "So, are your computer skills as legendary as you claim?"

Her face lit up. "You're going to have to try me." Then she went scarlet. "I-I don't mean literally…of course…I meant try my  _skills_." At his raised eyebrow, she flushed even more, stammering, "N-not  _that_ skills."

Adam burst out laughing. It was the first time in 24 hours and it felt good. Reaching into his jacket pocket, he stood, pulling out his card. "I have to go, but if you're serious about helping, I'd like to take you up on the offer. Give me a call when you have some free time. I'd appreciate it." He threw a large bill onto the counter, indicating to the waitress that he was paying for both of their beverages.

It probably wasn't necessary to have her consult for the department since they had their own IT specialists. But since it gave him an excuse to see her again, he didn't see the harm in extending the invitation. If she didn't call though, he'd have to think about his next move.

Felicity accepted the card and read the bold black lettering on the front. She smiled up at him. "I may just do that."

"Then I look forward to it." Adam inclined his head and moved toward the door, conscious of the fact that the hole in the back of his head seemed larger than ever.

* * *

Felicity sat at her desk at the foundry reconnecting computer screens to hard drives and all other kinds of paraphernalia. It had taken her hours, but she'd managed to get them back online. There was still a lot of work to do and they were nowhere near their previous level of efficiency, but she was satisfied that it was adequate for now.

As far as she was aware, Oliver had been stuck in board meetings all day and was currently escorting his mother to some charity event while Sara was working the bar upstairs. She was relieved to have avoided him thus far.

Stretching, she rolled the kinks out of her shoulders. Diggle collapsed into the vacant chair beside her. "I don't think I've ever felt this tired," he moaned.

Felicity grinned at him. "I'd high five you, but I don't think I can muster enough strength to lift another finger, never mind my entire hand."

He grunted in agreement. A comfortable silence lingered between them. Diggle cleared his throat. "Oliver said that he saw you at Big Belly with Adam Donner this morning."

Felicity frowned, suddenly annoyed. "Why would he tell you that? It wasn't a big deal. Or any of his business for that matter," she added as an afterthought.

Diggle shrugged. "He just mentioned it. Seemed a little cheesed off, a little concerned."

There was a time when that news might have given her hope. But not anymore. "Adam is-"

"Adam, is it?" Diggle teased.

Felicity rolled her eyes at him, but she couldn't keep the smile off her face. "We met by chance and struck up a conversation. He asked me to help out with the server in their office building if I had time. They're apparently dealing with some major worms."

"You like him?" Diggle pried.

She glanced at him, a little exasperated. "Did you hear me say that I just met him? I don't know him well enough to have formed any opinions." She reached for a paper clip and played with it.

Diggle gave her the side-eye. "But of course you've already formed an opinion," he countered knowingly.

Sometimes Felicity forgot how well Diggle knew her. Since they'd met, he'd been like her protector, her concerned older brother. She knew they shared a special bond that was different to either of their relationships with Oliver.

"I may have," she hedged.

A soft burst of laughter escaped from Diggle's lips. "Out with it."

She scoffed. "Am I allowed no secrets?"

"Not from me," he deadpanned.

Felicity laughed. She couldn't help it. Diggle was her best friend. "He seems nice and not at all what I expected."

Gently, Diggle said, "You seem a lot better than you were last night."

Felicity didn't bother to pretend that she didn't know what he was talking about. She wouldn't insult his intelligence that way. "I just needed a time-out. To gain some perspective. I'm alright now."

He looked at her skeptically. "Really." It was a statement, not a question.

She returned his stare. "Yes, really. I…I've re-evaluated. There are some dreams that are not meant to come true, Dig. So they remain just that – a dream. Now that I've accepted that, I can move on," she finished softly.

He reached over and squeezed her hand. "You deserve the best."

Genuinely touched, Felicity returned his gesture. "Thanks."

Diggle smiled and leaned his head back against his chair. "So, you going to help Adam out or what?"

Before Felicity could respond, Oliver's voice infiltrated their quiet moment. "Not if I have anything to say about it."

Felicity swiveled around in her chair to face the man who'd broken her heart for the last time. Ready to do battle, and yet surprisingly calm she replied, "You have got to stop with these dramatic one-liners."

"Dig, Felicity and I need to talk."

Felicity met Diggle's gaze. She appreciated that he wanted her okay. She smiled at him reassuringly and nodded. Without a word to either of them, he stood, sending Oliver a warning glance before departing.

Feeling at a distinct disadvantage with Oliver nearly towering over her, Felicity stood too. She'd known this moment was coming from the second she'd left the foundry the night before. She hadn't been ready to face Oliver then, but she was more than ready now.

Steeling herself against the concern mingled with confusion clearly evident in his eyes, she took a steadying breath, "Well? Let's hear it."


	4. Chapter 4

"What's going on between you and Donner?"

 _So much for beating around the bush_. Placing her fingers at her temples, she prayed for patience. "Firstly, his name is Adam-"

"Oh, sorry," he interjected. "I wasn't aware that you two were on a first name basis already."

Felicity took a deep breath, ignoring his sarcasm. "His name is Adam," she repeated. "And there is nothing going on between us."

Oliver opened his mouth, but she held up a finger to silence him. "And even if there was, it wouldn't be any of your business."

He gaped at her, running a hand distractedly over his short hair. "None of my business? The guy's a snake! Why would you even be entertaining someone like him?"

Walking up to Oliver, she poked him in the chest with her index finger. "You are not allowed to tell me who I may, or may not socialize with. If I want to talk to Adam or anyone else for that matter, I don't need your permission."

"He tried to jail my mother!" Oliver's voice rose, incensed.

"He was doing his job!" she countered stubbornly.

His eyes narrowed, his voice dropping an octave. "Now you're defending him?"

Felicity rolled her eyes. "You're being completely unreasonable. Technically, Laurel prosecuted your mother and you're still friendly with her."

By the way his jaw tightened, she could tell that she'd hit her mark. "That's different."

Throwing her hands up in exasperation, she asked, "How?"

"I don't trust him," he ground out. The soft glow of the computer screens highlighted his angular features to perfection. Felicity resolved to stay on point and not allow herself to become distracted by her unrequited attraction to him.

"How you feel isn't relevant," she started, grabbing her purse and stuffing her keys inside. She needed to occupy her hands or she was likely to throttle him. She cleared her throat. "I don't see you sending your new girlfriends past me for inspection."

"What?!" _That clearly touched a nerve._

Felicity's chin rose. She refused to cower. "You heard me. I don't pick the women you date. You don't get to have a say in the men I choose."

A strangled laugh filled with disbelief escaped into the air. "So now you're dating the DA?"

Did he think she wasn't good enough? Irritated, she felt her hackles rising. "What? No. I'm trying to make a point."

He leaned in closer to her, his voice dangerously low. "Here's my point: I forbid you to see him again."

Felicity's mouth dropped open, fury building up inside of her at an alarming rate. She couldn't believe his arrogance. "This is not about  _you_ , Oliver. This is about  _me_! A concept that must be pretty hard for you to grasp since you can't seem to focus on anyone's needs beyond yours. I may work for you, but you don't own me!"

Oliver looked at her sharply, shaking his head. "I've never treated you that way."

Felicity dumped her purse back onto the desk, placed her hands on her hips and glared at him. "Haven't you? I'm an IT specialist. That's my job, what I'm trained to do. But right now, I'm your personal assistant. A title that's only marginally less patronizing than calling me your secretary! All done without so much as a courteous consultation! Do you want to know what that makes me?" Angrily, she shoved a lock of hair out of her face. "Let me tell you. The laughing stock at Queen Consolidated!"

"Felic-"

She didn't give him a chance to respond. She walked past him, filled with restless energy, and stopped in front of his case of arrows. She was trying to control the myriad of emotions coursing through her before turning back to face him. "And don't tell me that  _we_  know the truth, because that doesn't make me feel less ridiculous while I'm ordering your favourite sandwich for lunch!"

Oliver unzipped his black jacket, worn casually over designer blue jeans and a white Henley. He threw it in the general direction of a workbench although neither of them noticed when it missed its mark and landed in a heap on the floor. "You know I value your contribution here, Felicity. In order for us to be able to do the things we need to, you have to be close to me. That's the only reason I moved you upstairs. We've discussed this," he explained, as though she were a child.

Her gaze flashed at him. "No, we didn't. You decided it and I was just expected to smile and accept it. I used to be admired by my colleagues, Oliver. Now they all think I'm just another dumb blonde chasing after you."

Oliver looked dumbstruck. "They do not." She noticed that his words were said with less conviction.

Felicity knew that if she didn't stand her ground now, he'd always assume that he could run roughshod over her. No matter how she felt about him, how her heart ached every time she saw him, the only way she was ever going to get over it, was by learning to stand up for herself. If he couldn't love her, then she would make darned sure that he respected her.

"Don't they?" She laughed humorlessly. They were standing so close; she could smell the combination of his aftershave and that scent that was uniquely his – masculine, clean, fresh. "You don't hear the whispers, do you? You don't see the sly looks; you don't have to ignore the crude remarks. But despite all that, I did as you asked with minimal protest because it was for the greater good. Because that's what I do; I look at the bigger picture, I take one for team and I try not to be selfish." On a roll, becoming more emotional with every word and yet unable to stop the bitter tirade, she continued, "But those sentiments don't apply to you. You get to do what you want regardless of the consequences as long as it benefits you."

"That's not true!" He drew a ragged breath and she could tell his mind was racing, measuring her words, perhaps searching for any semblance of truth.

Flabbergasted at his ignorance, she fought to hold back the tears burning at the back of her throat. "Diggle and I don't even have personal lives because we're so focused on keeping your secret safe. But you? Oh, you have more than enough going on in your private time to make up for the sorry state of ours." She raised her hand and started ticking off fingers. "Let's see. Helena, McKenna, Laurel, Isabel, Sara. Have I missed anyone?" Felicity knew she was out of line, but she didn't care. She was just so tired of hiding her feelings and suffering in silence. "While you reap the benefits of no-strings liaisons, I've endured a different fate. Humiliation, Oliver. Constant humiliation." She hated that her voice shook with angry tears. "My professional life is a joke."

A lone tear tracked down her cheek. By the stricken look in Oliver's eyes she could see she'd struck a chord. She'd hurt him. Seeing that suddenly let all the wind out of her sails. She wasn't mean by nature. She never set out to cause anyone pain and she hated that their relationship had reached this point. But perhaps it was necessary too.

It wasn't his entire fault either. If she hadn't been so upset, she'd have owned up to her role in creating this mess. She'd allowed him to take her for granted because of her feelings for him. He'd hurt her time and again because she'd allowed him to and not because he's been acting intentionally. The obvious solution was that they needed to set some boundaries and Oliver was never going to be the one to do it. That left the task to her.

He stood completely still, his eyes locked with hers. The silence between them stretched uncomfortably until Oliver finally asked, "Why now, Felicity? Why haven't you ever told me any of this before?"

_Because I can't stand the thought that you'd rather be with anyone other than me._

The gentleness in his tone was nearly her undoing. She knew he cared about her. He just didn't care in the way she'd always hoped he would. She knew Oliver wasn't really as callous as she'd made him out to be. Was he oblivious, arrogant and single-minded at times? Yes. Was he deliberately cruel? No. But that didn't mean that her words had no basis in truth. "I guess because I never thought I'd have to spell it out. You used to be really good at getting me. Perhaps you just don't anymore."

He looked completely out of his depth. If the deep frown between his brows was any indication, she'd given him a lot to think about. "I don't know what to say."

Sniffing, she dabbed a tissue to the corners of her eyes. "Oliver, it's late and I'm tired. I think enough's been said today." She picked up her purse and swung it over her shoulder.

"Can I give you a ride home?" he asked softly, watching her, his gaze guarded.

"Err, no, thanks. My car's outside."

With a small smile she brushed past him on her way out. He caught her arm. She could feel the warmth of his touch right through her shirt. "You know this conversation isn't over, right?"

She nodded.

"No matter what decisions I've made, Felicity, I want you to know that I never meant to disregard the feelings of my favourite IT girl." The smile he gave her suggested he was trying to lighten the mood.

A week ago, that comment would have resulted in a smile but at that moment, it made her sadder than ever. Crossing her arms over her chest protectively she whispered, "The fact that you still seem to think of me as a girl is perhaps the entire problem, Oliver. I'm not a girl, I'm a grown woman. I have been since the moment you met me. Apparently you're the only person incapable of seeing that."

Feeling as though a weight had finally been lifted from her shoulders, Felicity walked past him and out of the foundry.


	5. Chapter 5

Oliver was sitting behind his desk at Queen Consolidated trying to focus on the report in front of him, but unable to fully concentrate. Felicity was at her desk right outside his office, her fingers flying across her keyboard as she worked. Every word she'd said the night before still reverberated in his head, the image of her standing before him, indignation mixed with vulnerability, flashed through his mind at regular intervals leaving an unmistakable trail of guilt in its wake.

She'd hardly spoken a word to him in the four hours since she'd arrived at work. Well, she'd spoken to him coolly and politely about QC issues and given him an update on some recon she was doing, but not one personal word. He wasn't used to her being so distant and as a result, he didn't know how to handle the situation. A part of him wanted to apologise while the other part, mainly comprised of his pride, was still too bruised to make the first move.

Throwing his expensive pen down, he watched it roll slowly toward the edge of the desk before colliding with the base of his computer screen and coming to an abrupt halt.

"Now that looks fascinating," came Diggle's droll voice as he approached Oliver.

Reclining in his seat, Oliver glanced at his driver-by-day, vigilante-team-member-by-night as he settled into a comfortable chair. "Not really."

Oliver's gaze strayed past Diggle and settled once more on Felicity. Whoever she was talking to on the phone had made her laugh. As a result she became more animated as she spoke, her hands gesturing wildly. Diggle followed his line of sight.

"You two not talking?"

Oliver rubbed a hand over his face, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Apparently not." Diggle looked at him, clearly expecting an explanation. "Dig…" he started hesitatingly, not sure how to phrase his question. He generally didn't ask for other people's opinions on personal matters. "Do you think that I'm selfish?"

"Hell yeah," was said without hesitation.

Oliver gave him a quelling look and Diggle laughed. "For real?"

Oliver nodded.

"Then yes, I do think you can be selfish at times." Oliver swore under his breath and Diggle continued, "But I don't think that you mean to be or that you're always aware of when you're doing it."

"Thanks. That makes it sound so much better," he replied sarcastically.

Diggle shrugged. "Man, you asked."

Oliver sighed. "Felicity told me that I've been selfish in relation to the two of you and that I've single handedly destroyed her credibility in her field."

Diggle issued a low whistle. "Finally she's standing up for herself." With a brotherly smile he glanced back through the glass wall to where the petite blonde was sitting and said, "Way to go, Felicity."

Oliver frowned. "So you agree." It was a statement.

For the first time since he arrived, Diggle faced him, all traces of amusement gone. "Yes, I do. Oliver, I think you're one of the best men I know, but I also think that when it comes to understanding the people around you, you're possibly the worst."

Restless and not liking the way Diggle's words made him sound, he stood and walked over to the window, staring out over the city. "I had no idea that she was taking so much flack from other employees." The idea that people were gossiping about Felicity and maligning her character didn't sit well with him.

"She's handled it remarkably well under the circumstances, but it's not easy for her. She knows why you moved her here. I just think that she'd have appreciated it if you'd made her a part of the decision." He paused, letting the words sink in. "It was  _her_  reputation to lose, Oliver. The least you could have done was ask her if she was okay with it."

Shoving his hands into his pockets, Oliver turned to face the man sitting opposite him. "I don't like Adam Donner sniffing around her."

Diggle scoffed. "Please. Felicity can handle her own personal life. It's not your concern."

Oliver looked at him sharply. "How can you say that? You're telling me you'd be happy to have her hang out with that…poser?"

Raising an eyebrow, Diggle asked, "Poser? Seriously? Adam Donner is a nice guy. You have no rational reason for disliking him."

"He-"

"And don't give me that crap about your mother and the trial. Using that logic, you shouldn't be friends with Laurel Lance anymore. And yet you are."

Fisting his hands in his pockets, Oliver remembered that Felicity had said the same thing. "I don't want her to get hurt. Guys like him - self-important, worldly, experienced - he'd take advantage of her."

"You do realize that you've just described yourself?"

Shocked, he didn't respond immediately. Diggle jumped to his feet, clearly annoyed. "You know man, that right there is your entire problem. Felicity's not some kid who can't handle herself. She's a grown woman and she certainly knows what she wants. It's one thing for you to look out for her, it's quite another to want to dictate the terms her personal life."

"I'm not-"

"Yes," Diggle interrupted vehemently. "You are."

A headache imminent, Oliver turned to look at the girl in question.  _Woman._  She was sipping from her Wonder Woman mug as she scrolled through some information on screen. Clad in a short, royal blue fitted dress, her blonde locks smoothed back into her customary pony tail, he had to admit, she didn't look like a girl.

Startled by the unbidden thought, he blinked rapidly to dispel the inappropriate road his brain had ventured down.

_That's Felicity. Put a lid on it._

* * *

It had been a trying morning. Felicity wasn't used to ignoring Oliver or feeling awkward in his presence. Since her verbal attack the night before, she didn't know if they could ever go back to the easy way things had always been. Maybe she didn't want it to. She regretted nothing. It had been a long time coming and ultimately she needed to start thinking about herself and less about how her actions affected Oliver.

Despite that, she couldn't help being conscious of his every move – whether he was on the phone, pacing around in his spacious sanctum or chatting to Diggle - it was as though her mind had attuned itself to his every impulse and she struggled to break free of it. But she was determined. All it would take was some practice and she was sure that in time, she'd be over it.

Glancing down, her eyes fell on the card propped against her keyboard. Chewing on her bottom lip indecisively, she decided that it was time to step out of her comfort zone. It was a new day, a clean slate and way past time she started taking a few chances.

Decision made, she grabbed her coat and headed outside.

* * *

The DA's office was a noisy place. It looked like most other governmental departments – linoleum floors, faded walls, cramped working space, furniture that was at least twenty years old – basically the complete antithesis of life at Queen Consolidated.

Following the instructions of a guy who'd passed her in the hall, Felicity approached a secretarial station that housed a formidable looking woman. Half afraid, she stopped in front of the desk. "Uh, hi. I'm Felicity Smoak. Could I talk to Ad-, I mean the DA?" She flashed her sweetest smile.

The woman didn't even acknowledge her. "Do you have an appointment?"

 _I should have called first_. "Err, no. But I'm sure that if you tell him-."

"If you don't have an appointment, you don't get in," came the surly reply.

Trying again, Felicity cajoled, "If he knows it's me-."

Finally the woman looked up and gave Felicity a cursory once-over. "They all say that, honey." The last word was definitely not an endearment.

 _So much for spontaneity._  Defeated, she turned to leave just as the door to her left shot open.

"If you could scan those documents to me by 4pm, I'd appreciate it." Adam was walking toward her, but his attention was focused on the page he held in one hand, the other holding his mobile to his ear. Felicity smiled as she noticed that he still had the one with the cracked screen.

Dressed in a grey suit, crisp white shirt and a pale blue tie, he looked incredibly handsome. Suddenly, her palms felt a little clammy.  _What am I doing?_  At the exact moment that she decided to make a hasty exit, he looked up and their eyes met.

His lips curved into an immediate smile. "Steve, I'll call you back." Without even waiting for the caller's reply, he disconnected.

"Felicity," he said, extending a hand toward her. She couldn't stop the blush that stained her cheeks at his obvious pleasure at seeing her. "I'm glad you came."

Glancing at his secretary who was paying them no attention, she returned his smile and found her hand enveloped in his. "I-If you're busy, I can always come back another time."

He shook his head. "Not at all. Come this way." He gestured toward his open office door. "Alice," he said, addressing the curt woman who worked for him. "Hold my calls, please."

Happy that he was making time for her, Felicity walked into his office and turned to face him as the door closed behind them.

"Can I take your coat?" he asked politely, already helping her out of it.

Both of them seated, his blue eyes were warm and welcoming as they focused completely on her. "I was starting to think that you'd decided that the Starling City DA's office was a lost cause."

Felicity laughed. "The thought crossed my mind, but in the end curiosity won. I couldn't wait to see what IT relics from the past you have hidden in the bowels of this building."

He grinned and Felicity found herself relaxing into her chair. "Relics? I guarantee you'll probably find some of them. A few in human form as well. We don't unfortunately have Queen Consolidated's resources available to us."

"But you have me," she said before she'd given proper thought to how that would sound.

Embarrassed, she was about to backtrack when Adam replied, his voice unusually deep, "I think I can speak for the entire department when I say that we're incredibly grateful."

Not sure what to say, Felicity pointed to his computer screen. "Your server still down?"

At the look of disgust Adam sent the machine, Felicity took that as an affirmative.

"You still interested in trying me?" Her eyes widening, she flushed.  _What is wrong with my brain?_  "That's the…uh…second time I say that in your presence. I-I swear, it sounded completely different in my head."

He grinned, his eyes alight with mirth. "In answer to your question, yes, I am most definitely still interested in trying you." The way he emphasized the last two words, made her blush even more.  _Is he flirting with me?_

Swallowing nervously, she smoothed her hands over the skirt of her dress. "Well, shall we travel back in time?"

* * *

Adam escorted Felicity down to the basement, their lighthearted chatter making the distance seem that much shorter. Once there, he introduced her to the three tech guys who'd thus far failed to figure out what kept tripping their servers. Standing aside while she quizzed them, Adam felt sure that Felicity Smoak was not to be underestimated. She was clearly smart and if he was honest he was hoping that she'd give the three stooges a kick up their asses.

Watching her, she moved to the computer terminal that one of the guys had been working on. She looked really pretty, the blue of her dress a perfect compliment to her creamy complexion. Without asking their permission, she started pressing a series of keys, her eyes never leaving the screen. All three guys started protesting but Adam held up a hand. "What's the worst thing that could happen? You haven't managed to figure it out. Let the lady have a go."

He felt inexplicably pleased when she flashed him an impish smile. Intrigued, he moved closer to watch her work, the unmistakable hint of vanilla in her shampoo assailing his senses. The screen had gone blue with black text flashing across it as Felicity continued typing. She seemed completely absorbed, her eyes darting from one end of the screen to the next.

"Ah huh!" she exclaimed. Peering over her shoulder he couldn't see any difference, but the IT guys obviously could.

"Well, I'll be damned!" one muttered.

"I told you we should have tried that," said another.

"No, you didn't!" came the thirds heated response.

"Now, now boys. No need to get your knickers…wait, you guys don't wear knickers…briefs? Boxers?" She waved a distracted hand in front of her face. "Anyway, no need to get any unmentionables into a twist."

Pressing a final series of keys, a pleasant hum started up in the room. "All done," she said proudly, her face filled with delight. "Easy peasy."

Impressed, Adam stared at her, a little in awe. "You don't want a job here, do you?"

Felicity laughed. "You couldn't afford me."

Grinning, he escorted her out of the room. "There may be some other perks to be had."

"Oh?" she asked, her interest piqued.

He stopped in the hallway leading to his office. "Yeah. Dinner and drinks with the DA. Whenever. Wherever."

She placed a finger to her lips, pretending to contemplate. "Tempting." He thought she sounded flirtatious, but he could have been wrong. She didn't strike him as a natural flirt and that fact seemed to make him like her more.

Enjoying her sunny disposition and realizing that he'd genuinely like to get to know her better, he decided to be direct. "Would you like to have dinner with me tomorrow night?"

She seemed momentarily taken aback but she recovered quickly, a touch of crimson seeping into her cheeks. "Y-Yes, I'd like that."

Satisfied, he placed his hand at the small of her back and gently ushered her toward his office. "Then it's a date."


	6. Chapter 6

Felicity was nervous. It's wasn't like she hadn't been on a date before, she just hadn't been on one in a really long time. Working most days and nights didn't leave much room for a social life. Add into the mix her complicated feelings for her boss, which admittedly was a sad excuse for keeping other men at arm's length, and she was practically a newbie in the dating game.

Adam was also the reason for some of her anxiety. She liked him and the more time she spent with him, the more she realized that he wasn't anything like she'd thought he was. He'd called her earlier that morning to let her know that he'd pick her up around 7. It had been a while since she'd looked forward to something so much.

Most of her day, which should have been focused on installing the last of her IT equipment at the foundry, had been spent fretting about what to wear. She wanted to feel comfortable and confident, but at the same time, she also wanted to feel a little sexy. After all, it was perfectly normal to want to knock the socks off the man who'd asked you out.

She and Oliver were sort of talking again, although there was an underlying strain that probably wouldn't go away until they finished their conversation. Not wanting to be the one to open that can of worms again, she was leaving it for now.

"Going somewhere?" Diggle asked. She was standing at her computer terminal at the foundry, programming some updates. She'd already put her jacket on and was about to grab her purse when he approached.

She flashed him a smile over her shoulder. "Wouldn't you like to know?"

He chuckled. "You never leave this early. It's barely five-thirty."

"I" she said, pointing to herself, "have a date."

Diggle nodded approvingly. "The DA is a smart guy."

Feeling chuffed, she agreed. "He is, isn't he?"

"Isn't who?" came a female voice.

Felicity and Diggle turned to face Sara. "Felicity has a hot date."

Sara dropped a box onto the table. "With the guy that Oliver doesn't like?"

Felicity gritted her teeth. "Luckily Oliver isn't the one he asked out."

"Good point," Sara said, thoughtfully.

Not wanting to get into it, Felicity excused herself. "Well, I'm off. All updates are on a schedule and will run in the background in case you want to use any of the equipment," she told both of them.

Sara nodded. "Got it. Have fun."

"I'll walk you out," Diggle said as she sent a wave in Sara's direction.

"It's normal that I'm nervous, right?" They were walking toward her car. "Because I can tell you, I don't think that I could eat anything tonight. And the purpose of dinner and drinks is well…dinner and drinks. I'm sure Adam doesn't want his date puking all over him."

"F-"

"Not that I have plans to puke on him. But you never know. Anything is possible," she rambled on. "Oh God, I'm babbling, aren't I?" she asked, looking at him worriedly. "How do I stop doing that? W-What if I talk too much and end up monopolizing the conversation with inane chatt-"

"Felicity!" Diggle said firmly, grasping her by the shoulders. His eyes were filled with amusement. "Relax. This isn't the first time you interact with him. Just be yourself. He already seems to like you as you are."

She felt some of the tension drain out of her shoulders. She gave a shaky laugh. "You're right. I'm over-thinking this."

He gave her a quick hug. "Just go with it and have a good time."

She hugged him back. "Thanks."

* * *

Oliver arrived at Fleur de Lis with his mother, sister, Sara and Roy. It had been Thea's suggestion that they all share a relaxed meal together since they hadn't done so in a long time. Oliver had his own reasons for avoiding his mother, none of which he could share with his sister. But he'd agreed to make her happy and to keep up appearances. The last thing he wanted was for Thea to get suspicious.

Seated at a table with the best view of the city, Oliver listened to the idle chatter going on around the table.

"I can't remember the last time I was here," Thea was saying.

"Well, I've never been here," Roy said a touch uncomfortably. "Not really my scene."

Thea elbowed him in the ribs. "It's way past time you were exposed to more than  _Diners, Drive-ins and Dives_."

Grinning, he ran a hand over his mid-section. "Hey, I happen to like that show."

Thea rolled her eyes. "My point exactly."

"If it makes you feel better, I haven't been here either," Sara said to Roy, sympathetically.

Moira placed her purse on the table. "They opened the year after you and Oliver went missing. I've been here a few times. Their service is excellent."

Sara looked around and mumbled under her breath, "More my sister's style than mine."

Oliver caught her eye and smiled apologetically. He wouldn't have subjected her to an evening with the Queen's but Thea had insisted.

Listening absentmindedly while everyone placed their orders, Oliver's eyes moved slowly across the room. The place was reasonably full for a weekday, but thankfully not overly so. The lighting was dim, casting a romantic glow throughout the establishment. Some couples were seated at round tables, some rotating slowly on the dance floor in the centre of the room. Over the sound of the piano, there was a pleasant hum of chatter and laughter. Scanning slowly while the waiter made his way toward him, his eyes strayed to a table a few feet to his left and lingered.

Laughing and apparently enthralled by the woman sitting across from him was Adam Donner. Oliver immediately sat up straight. Squinting in the darkened room, he made out the figure of a blonde woman, her hair tied into a simple, yet appealing updo. From what he could see her dress was black and probably asymmetrical judging by the way her one shoulder and a generous expanse of creamy skin on her back was exposed. Based on the lighting and his position, Oliver couldn't make out much more than that.

Cold fury washed over him. He'd known Donner was trouble from the second he'd seen him with Felicity. The fact that he'd been eyeing her a few days before and was now reeling in the hot blonde, spoke volumes about his dubious character.

Watching closely, he saw the DA stand and extend a hand to the woman sitting opposite him. She stood, revealing a broad sequined belt that cinched her in at the waist and emphasized the curves of her hips. Whoever she was, she was certainly attractive. As they stepped away from the table and made their way to the dance floor, Oliver excused himself from the table and followed, anger dogging his every step.

* * *

Felicity was having a wonderful time. Not only was Adam a prompt date, he was also attentive, charming and funnier than she would have imagined. Swaying gently in the circle of his arms, she couldn't remember the last time she'd felt so appreciated. The cherry on top of the cake was that it had nothing to do with work. It was all about  _her,_ Felicity, the woman and not Felicity, the IT girl.

"Have I told you how beautiful you look tonight?" Adam asked, smiling down at her. His one arm was wrapped loosely around her waist and the other was holding her hand gently in his. "Not that you needed to make a special effort on my part. I knew I liked you the moment you asked me to  _try you_ ," he teased.

Felicity laughed and her cheeks warmed. "What makes you think this was for you? I'll have you know, my entire closet is filled with dresses like this one."

He grinned. "I can only hope."

She could feel her bare knees brushing against the legs of his dark grey pants. With his jacket hanging over his chair, it was impossible not to notice the corded muscles of his back beneath his white shirt. _Clearly the DA works out._  "Wow, you're really fit." She blinked, realising what she'd said. "I-I mean you're lean…and muscled. Which is a good thing. Because the opposite of that would be not lean and not muscled."  _What am I saying?_  "And why I'm telling you this, I have no idea."

"That's really cute, you know," he said, tugging their hands closer to his chest.

She looked down at the knot of his tie. "My tendency to say the most inappropriate things?"

He chuckled. "Yeah, that. Except I don't see it as inappropriate. I find it…refreshing."

She didn't know what to say to that, so she remained silent, just moving with him in time to the music.

"You know what that means, right?" he asked after a while.

She cocked her head to the side enquiringly.

He bent forward slightly, his mouth close to her ear. "I'm going to have to keep asking you out until I've seen all of those dresses."

A flush of pleasure raced through her.  _Why couldn't Oliver- NO!_  She was here with Adam, not Oliver. There wasn't a circumstance on earth that would ever have resulted in her wrapped in Oliver's arms. Pushing the thought from her mind, she focused all her attention on the handsome man in front of her.

"In that case-" Her words were cut off when Adam's arm was wrenched away from her waist.

"You bastard! How dare you lead Felicity on? I knew this would happen! I tried to warn her!"

Felicity looked on in shock as Oliver wedged himself between her and her date.  _He doesn't know it's me!_  She didn't know whether she felt insulted or flattered by his ignorance.

"Oliver," Adam said, his gaze meeting hers over her boss's shoulder.

"From now on, you stay away from Felicity, or you'll have to deal with me." His words were low and threatening.

Coolly, completely unperturbed by the scene Oliver was making, Adam ignored him and extended his arm to Felicity. Like an automaton, she responded, stepping around Oliver and grasping Adam's elbow firmly, moving toward his side. "Perhaps you'd like the lady's opinion on that?"

As she came into Oliver's line of sight she knew the moment he recognized her. He went shock still, his stormy grey gaze clouding over with confusion and then awareness, his jaw going slack.  _Insulted, it is_.

"Good evening to you too, Oliver," she said caustically.

His mouth moved, but no words escaped. His eyes traveled over her, from the curve of her neck, slowly,down the length of her dress and stopped at the strappy heels of her stilettos. "Felicity. I-"

"Was just leaving," said Sara. None of them had heard or seen her approach. "You're making a scene," she said to Oliver, her voice filled with displeasure.

Felicity's eyes locked with his, unable to look away from the surprise and something else she couldn't identify, visible in their depths. Her stomach was a churning mass of butterflies. She didn't say a word, couldn't really. Was it impossible to spend just one night in peace? One night without him invading her thoughts, her presence, her personal space?

She was the first to break contact.

Gathering his wits, Oliver took a step back. His jaw clenched visibly. "I apologise," he said slowly. "I didn't recognize you," he said, looking in Felicity's direction. With a stiff nod at Adam, he muttered, "Excuse me," before heading toward the back of the room.

"That was not how I imagined things would go," Adam said as he stared after Oliver and Sara.

Still shaken by the look in Oliver's eyes, Felicity could only manage, "Me neither."

"Do you want to get out of here? I don't relish the idea of everyone staring at us for the remainder of the evening," Adam asked, walking her back to their table.

Relieved, Felicity readily agreed. "Yes, please." She didn't think she could enjoy the rest of her time with Adam knowing that Oliver was so close.

Heading toward the front of the restaurant, Felicity went to retrieve her coat while Adam settled the bill. Pushing her arms into the sleeves and hiking the collar behind her neck, she turned when she heard an approach. "That was quick," she said, expecting to see Adam.

Instead, she found Oliver, standing way too close. She took an involuntary step backward. Straightening, she gave him a blank stare. "Why are you here?"

"I came to have dinner with my family."

She glared at him. "No, I mean why are you  _here_?"

He swallowed, his Adam's apple, bobbing. "I wanted to say that I'm sorry. I didn't-"

"Recognize me, I know. I'm still trying not to feel offended." She looked around, silently urging Adam to hurry up.

"Felicity," he said. The soft tone of his voice made her look up at him. It was hard to hold onto her anger when he looked so contrite. "I didn't mean it the way it sounded."

She gave him a sad smile. "Yes, you did."

He closed his eyes, shaking his head.

"It's okay. I get it. You don't think that someone like him would ever truly be interested in someone like me." She buttoned her coat as she spoke, keeping her tone even.

Sharply, he answered, "It's not that. I just think that he has a…reputation with women. I don't want you to get hurt."

Irate, she couldn't stop herself from retorting, "Stop judging him by your own standards."

He took a step toward her, his eyes narrowing. "What is that supposed to mean?"

Shaking her head, she knew she'd said too much. "Nothing."

She turned to walk in the direction she assumed Adam was, but Oliver gently tugged her back. "Explain what you meant by that statement."

With his arm still holding hers, she replied swiftly, "It means that just because  _you_  could never be attracted to me, doesn't mean that  _someone like you_ , couldn't."

She'd stunned him. He stared at her, his eyes searching hers.

"Everything okay here?" Adam asked, walking to Felicity's side.

Oliver let go of her arm.

"Fine," Felicity said. "Oliver just came to say goodnight."

Looking doubtful, Adam took her hand. "You ready?"

She smiled at him genuinely. "Absolutely."

Without so much as a backward glance, she left with Adam.

* * *

Oliver stood in the foyer staring after them. Her words had startled him. Someone like him?  _What the hell is that supposed to mean?_

Frustrated, he felt like kicking something. Somehow, no matter what he said, he kept bungling things with Felicity. The shock of seeing her, in that dress, with wisps of curling hair tenderly framing her face…he'd been staggered. He hadn't meant to imply that he didn't find her attractive. Well, he didn't. Not in  _that_  way.

_Then why were you gaping at her like a hungry wolf?_

Dammit, he hadn't. Or had he?

Shaking his head, more confused than ever, he turned, only to be confronted by Sara, her rigid posture indicating that she was anything but amused.

"What the heck is going on with you?" she demanded.


	7. Chapter 7

"It's nothing," Oliver said distractedly, taking her arm and steering her back toward the dining area. "Let's join the othe-"

She yanked her arm free. "No! I want to know what's going on and I want to know now."

He really didn't want to have this conversation. "Sara, it was a misunderstanding. That's all."

She looked at him, her mouth growing taunt. He knew what that meant. They were going talk. Resigned, he gestured to an empty alcove just past the maître d.

"Do you realise that this is the second time, that I know of, that you've gone ballistic at the sight of Felicity with another man?"

Oliver felt a pang in his stomach but ignored it, shaking his head. "That's not what this is about."

She looked at him sceptically, irritation rolling off her in waves. "It's not? Excuse me for not believing you when you just stormed onto the dance floor like a jealous ex!"

He scoffed. "Now you're exaggerating."  _Was she?_  He adjusted his weight from one foot to the other. "I thought that Donner was here with someone else. I didn't realise it was Felicity."

A waiter passed them, looking at them suspiciously and Sara smiled, lowering her voice. "Do you have feelings for her?"

Her direct question threw him. Oliver waited a beat before opening his mouth to respond. The pause was apparently enough of an answer for Sara. She glowered at him, moving to walk past. He stepped into her path. "I do not have  _romantic_  feelings toward her."

She raised an eyebrow. "And yet your behaviour lately belies that very statement."

He stepped closer to her to avoid being overheard by a couple chatting nearby. "I care about her. We're friends, Sara, and I don't want to see her get hurt."

She pushed a blonde bang behind her ear impatiently. "What makes you so sure that Adam Donner is going to hurt her?"

"Because…" his voice trailed off, struggling to find the right combination of words.

"You have no logical reason, do you?" She spun away from him, running a frustrated hand through her hair. Turning back she said, "Felicity is a grown woman, Oliver, and she can take care of herself. If your claim that you only care for her as a friend is true, then I suggest that you get over whatever it is that's making you behave like a jackass and move on."

Frowning, she stepped around him and walked back to their table. Unable to do anything else, he followed, ignoring the curious looks coming from the other members of his party.

"Oliver, what on earth was that all about?" Moira asked, her tone clearly disapproving.

He sat down. "A misunderstanding," he said, repeating the same words he'd given Sara.

Roy leaned forward, placing his elbows on the table. "Who knew Felicity was so Smoakin' hot?" He grinned mischievously, clearly pleased with himself.

Thea glared at him, gesturing toward his elbows. "Firstly, that's bad manners." Roy looked down in confusion and slowly sat back. "Secondly," she said, turning to Oliver. "Who knew Felicity was so Smoakin' hot?"

Roy burst out laughing, amused that she'd repeated his line.

Oliver looked up from his menu and found four pairs of eyes staring at him. Thea's and Roy's were alight with interest while his mother's and Sara's were a mixture of annoyance and curiosity respectively.

"What?" he asked, without interest, hoping they'd move on.

"Ollie," Thea said with exasperation. "Focus! Is Felicity dating the DA?"

He shrugged. He didn't feel comfortable discussing the matter. "I don't know. It was one date."

Sara piped up, watching him closely. "Actually, she went to see him at his office yesterday."

Oliver felt a peculiar tightness in the region of his chest. "What?"

"She offered to help him with some IT problem."

He hadn't known that. No one had said a word. What did it all mean?

"Oh! Here's our first course." Moira said, taking everyone's attention off him. "Oliver, I took the liberty of ordering…" His mother's words faded into the background as his mind replayed the scene that was currently burning a hole into his brain - Felicity standing in the DA's arms, her body gently swaying against his.

Involuntarily his hands tightened around the menu he was holding.

Was Felicity actually dating Adam Donner?

_And if she is? What then?_

Unable to answer the question his conscience posed, he placed the menu to the side and smiled blankly at the waiter who positioned a plate in front of him.

* * *

Fifteen minutes after leaving the restaurant, Felicity found herself sitting under the Star Bridge. It was one of the most recognisable landmarks in Starling City and also offered the best views.

Huddled into her coat for warmth and a cup of steaming coffee in her hands, she sat beside Adam as they took in the sights while enjoying one another's company. It wasn't the most obvious place to take someone, but she thought it was rather perfect.

"What made you decide to become an attorney?" Felicity asked, angling herself to get a better look at him. It was dark, but the lights from the bridge above illuminated his striking features. He'd removed his tie and left the top three buttons of his shirt loose, giving her a teasing glimpse of his exposed throat. The more relaxed look definitely suited him.

He leaned back, letting his head rest against the bench. "A few things, but mainly I wanted do something meaningful with my life. Law seemed like a good option." She got the the feeling that there was a lot he wasn't saying.

"It's an admirable occupation," Felicity said sincerely.

"What about you?" he asked. "Was IT always the obvious choice?"

Felicity never really spoke about her personal life because, well, no one ever asked. She was surprised by how nice it felt to have someone take an interest. "It was. I always liked fixing things and when I got my first computer, I initially spent more time taking it apart and putting it back together than I actually did working on it."

Adam laughed. "Your parents must have loved that."

"You can imagine," she said, her voice filled with mirth. "When the time came to make a decision about what I wanted to do with my life after High School, the choice was simple."

He nodded, understanding. "You enjoy working at Queen Consolidated?"

She took a sip of her coffee. "I do. Not many places have the resources and means to keep up with the latest trends in technology. It's nice to be at the forefront of all things new and innovative."

He hesitated. "And Oliver? You seem to have a close relationship with him."

Felicity knew what he was asking and she was glad to be able to answer honestly. "There was never and will never be anything more than the platonic between Oliver and I. We work together, and on occasion we're friends, but that's all." She ignored the twinge in her heart.

He raised an eyebrow. "Occasionally?"

Felicity smiled. "When he's not scaring off my dates." Then frowned. "Well, it's not like he's had all that many to scare off…come to think of it, there's been a total of…well, one." She laughed a little self-consciously. "It's kinda embarrassing to admit that I have absolutely no personal life."

Adam sat up straight, his mouth ajar. "Surely you've dated frequently?"

She shook her head. "Nope. Not me."

Clearly surprised, he asked, "What is wrong with the men in this city?"

Felicity shrugged. "Most men are generally not attracted to me."

At his frown she explained, "Come on. I say inappropriate things, I tend to babble incessantly and I don't exactly have all of the social graces that make others of my sex so popular."

"All of which is a definite plus in my book."

Felicity looked at him, their eyes meeting.  _He means it._  A little bubble of pleasure exploded in her chest.

She watched as he moved closer, his eyes never breaking contact with hers. She knew he was going to kiss her, but he was giving her enough time to back out if it wasn't what she wanted. Charmed by his thoughtfulness and sufficiently curious to want it to happen, she waited until his lips were a hairsbreadth away from hers before she moved forward and closed the remaining distance between them.

He smelled fresh - a little woody, a little nutty; in a word, masculine. It wasn't overpowering at all, barely there in fact, which implied that a woman had to get close to him to be able to smell him. She liked that.

His lips were firm and cool beneath hers, coaxing and yet non-threatening. His hands were cradling her face gently as his lips explored hers, enticing a response. It didn't take her long at all.  _The DA is a good kisser_.

Dazed, she almost protested aloud when his lips softly disengaged from hers. His blue eyes seemed to have grown darker, his breath just a little erratic.

Adam wasn't Oliver Queen, the man who'd held her heart captive from the moment she'd met him. He wasn't the guy she'd secretly hoped would learn, in time, to think of her as more than his trusty sidekick. But unlike Oliver, he didn't seem incapable of genuinely caring about her in a way that she knew she deserved.

"I like you, Felicity Smoak," Adam whispered, his voice deeper than usual.

She smiled. Truth be told, she liked him too.


	8. Chapter 8

The following morning Felicity was humming softly to herself while dropping a report on Oliver's desk. She felt happy. She'd had a wonderful time with Adam the night before and she was really looking forward to seeing him again.

"Katy Perry? Really?"

Startled, she gave a little shriek and spun around clutching her heart. "Oliver! Do not sneak up on me like that!"

He walked deeper into the room, a cautious smile on his face. "Sorry. I'm practiced at stealth. It tends to come naturally."

Felicity stared at him. "Wait a minute. How did you know that was Katy Perry?" she asked, suspiciously.

Oliver rolled his eyes at her. "Felicity, I may have been on an island for five years, but I've been back for a while now."

She looked at him dubiously. "Considering how far behind you are in terms of pop culture references, not to mention that your taste in music is still stuck in the nineties, you can't blame me for being a little…" She brought her thumb and forefinger close together, "skeptical."

Felicity could tell that he wanted to laugh. "Have you been speaking to Thea?"

She grinned. "Maybe. But then again, you didn't know what punk'd meant when Roy mentioned it the other day. As a result I've taken the liberty of judging you and lowering my expectations."

"There is this invention found in most homes and vehicles called a radio. Mine still works," he told her, amused.

Felicity gave him a mocking smile. "A pity you haven't ventured near the internet yet. Imagine the world that awaits."

They stood grinning at one another and Felicity was struck by how much she'd missed their banter. With things between them being so tense lately, they'd hardly exchanged any words that weren't spoken in hurt or anger.

Hesitating, not sure if she should leave, she pointed to the document she'd dropped onto his desk. "Err…your Management report. Isabel sent it via the internal mail."

He briefly glanced at the thick volume before looking back at her. "Thank you." Silence filled the room.

 _This is awkward_. "So, where is Dig? I haven't seen him this morning."

Oliver seemed relieved that she'd spoken and took the lead. "He's dropping Thea off at Verdant. Her car went in for a service."

Felicity nodded, wringing her hands. "Well, if you don't need anything else, I'll just-"

"Wait. Please," he added, softly.

Oliver seemed different. He looked the same as he always did, gorgeous, in a ridiculously expensive suit with an appealing smattering of stubble across his jaw and cheeks. But his eyes, there was something she couldn't quite define evident in their depths. That anomaly is what made her waver.

He gestured to a chair and waited until she sat down before seating himself behind his desk.

"I've been doing some thinking." He spoke carefully, an indication that he was searching for the right words. "I want to offer you your old job back."

Felicity couldn't have been more astonished. "W-What do you mean?"

Tugging at his tie as though it was uncomfortable, he explained. "You were right. I was wrong to just assume that I could move you here without first talking to you about it. I'm really sorry that you've had a tough time with the rest of the staff." She knew that he was sincere. "If you'd like to go back to working downstairs, then we can work something out that still enables an open line of communication between us in the event of an emergency."

She pushed her spectacles up, pleased. She hadn't expected anything like this. "Oliver, I never meant that I wanted to go back downstairs."

He leaned his forearms onto the desk. "But you said-"

"I said that I wanted you to consult me before you moved me. It's a little too late for that now."

He sighed heavily and she couldn't help feeling sorry for him. Oliver messed up a lot, but he was by no means a bad person. She knew that what she'd said to him must have weighed heavily if he'd made the decision to talk to her about it and offer some form of amends.

"Then what can I do?" He looked so helpless that she couldn't stop the rush of desire to comfort him.  _Don't be absurd._

Steeling herself against the instinct, she replied, "You don't have to do anything, other than promise me that something like this won't ever happen again. Besides, moving back downstairs would only make things worse."

"You have my word," he said softly before enquiring, "Worse?"

Felicity gestured with her hands, a little self consciously. "You know, they'll all assume that you've dumped me and was attempting to get rid of me in the simplest way."

Oliver looked at her, so serious. "If you want me to address the rumours, I will."

She knew that he would, but she shook her head, her ponytail brushing against the back of her neck. "Thanks, but no. The less attention we give this situation, the sooner it's likely to blow over."

"You're sure?"

"Yes, I'm sure," she said as she heard her phone ringing at her desk. Peering at his handset, she jerked her head toward it. "Do you mind?"

Oliver pushed his chair back as she hurried around to his side. "Hello?"

* * *

Oliver watched as her cheeks flooded with colour and his gut clenched at the sight. "H-Hi Adam. Yeah, I'm just with Oliver."

She was wearing a bright yellow shirt with a black and white print skirt. Strange how he'd never noticed what great legs she had. Troubled by the wayward thought, he focused on her face.

Felicity went silent and then smiled.  _She really likes this guy._  Disturbed by feelings he didn't want to investigate, he cleared his throat. She met his eyes. "Um, could you hold on a second? I'll transfer your call to my desk." She waited a moment and then pressed a series of keys before hanging up. The phone at her desk started ringing again.

As she withdrew from his desk, he moved forward to wheel his chair back into position. Distracted, he didn't see it coming until it was too late. They collided, with Felicity falling backward into his lap. With a yelp she threw her arms around his neck to maintain her balance. Instinctively, he reached for her, grasping her at the waist and pinning her against him.

Their faces were inches apart. Oliver found himself staring past the lenses of her spectacles into her pretty blue eyes. She swallowed and his eyes followed the direction of the movement, stopping to focus on her bright pink lips. He knew that he should let her go, but his hands clung to her hips, reluctant to do its master's bidding.

"Hey, Olive-"

They jumped apart like two teenagers caught in a compromising position. Diggle looked from one to the other, his eyes razor-sharp, missing nothing.

Uncomfortable, Felicity fidgeted with her hair and addressed Diggle. "I err…fell into Oliver's lap." When Diggle scoffed, she clarified, "Unintentionally. I-I…sort of tripped…" Her voice rose slightly before trailing off.

Oliver noticed that she was unable to meet his gaze. Mumbling a hasty thanks, she ran for her phone. He'd forgotten that it was ringing.

Diggle closed the door behind her. "Well now, aren't you a sly one?"

Oliver pretended to shuffle some papers across his desk in the hope that Diggle would take the hint and drop it.

"You going to tell me why you were eye humping the DA's new girlfriend?"

Oliver gave him a quelling look. "She stumbled, we collided." He ignored the girlfriend part entirely.

Diggle looked unconvinced. "Oh, that I can believe. I'm referring, specifically, to the part where you didn't seem to want to let her go."

 _I didn't._  Perplexed, Oliver stood and closed the button of his suit jacket. He needed to get out there. "I don't know what you're talking about." Moving around his desk, he walked toward the door.

"Oliver?"

He stopped, turning his head to look at his friend. "Yes?" he asked patiently.

Diggle regarded him strangely, the penetrating nature of his stare making him feel uncomfortable. "Look, I don't know exactly what's been going on between you and Felicity lately, but what I saw earlier makes me a little worried."

Oliver frowned. "Worried?"

"Don't mess with her, Oliver," he warned.

Oliver strode up to him. "What," he asked, offended, "is that supposed to mean?"

Diggle held his ground. "You  _know_. For some reason you've finally decided to notice that Felicity is actually an attractive woman." He overlooked Oliver's bafflement. "I have eyes. I saw the way you looked at her."

He gnashed his teeth together. "I don't know what you  _think_  you saw, but I would never deliberately hurt her."

With a nod, Diggle acknowledged his words. "Maybe not. But you could do much worse by unintentionally giving her the idea that you feel more than you actually do just because you don't like the thought of having to share her with someone else."

The words, said without malice, struck a chord. "That's not what I'm doing."

The other man placed a hand on his shoulder. "For her sake, I hope not."

"Dig, it's just…" He didn't know how to express the crazed emotions he'd been experiencing lately.

"What?"

Exhaling harshly, he mentally shook himself. "Nothing. It's nothing. We should get going. My meeting is across town."

Leading the way, he tried to disregard the sound of Felicity's laughter as they passed by her desk, and how the knowledge that someone else was on the receiving end of it, pierced straight through his detached façade.


	9. Chapter 9

Late the next morning, a steaming cappuccino in hand, Felicity walked into the foundry and found Sara and Roy sparring in the center of the room. Immediately she released the breath she hadn't known she'd been holding. Oliver wasn't there. After their last encounter, she felt that it would be better if she avoided him for a while. Just the thought of herself cradled in his lap, his hands on her body, his lips inches from her own, caused her throat to go dry. If she kept her distance, there would surely come a day when the memory of that encounter didn't fill her with the most unbearable longing.

She'd made a vow to move on and she was determined to keep that promise to herself. Whatever cruel reason fate had to shove what she could never have right under her nose, she would overlook it. Oliver was seeing someone else and she was embarking on what she hoped would be the start of a wonderful relationship. She wasn't going to jeopardise that.

His brows furrowed in concentration, Roy listened as Sara tutored him.

"The eyes, Roy," she explained. "They can tell you more than any other form of body language. Focus on them. Learn to read them. Once you master the ability, you will be able to preempt most strikes."

Removing her purple coat, Felicity draped it over a chair and placed her purse on top of the seat. She heard the sound of flesh connecting with flesh and winced slightly. While she often toyed with the idea of resuming her self-defense lessons, the idea of actually having to trade blows with someone wasn't really all that appealing.

"Yeah!" Roy exclaimed. Turning, Felicity saw that he'd knocked Sara to the ground, his arm at her throat. A sudden spring in his step, Roy stood and reached down to help his instructor up.

"I got you," he told her proudly.

Sara laughed and accepted the hand he extended towards her. "I confess, you're a fast learner."

Grabbing a towel, he wiped at the beads of perspiration on his forehead. "Hey Felicity," he said, wheeling the chair she'd dumped her coat and purse on and flopping into it with a sigh.

His breathing was labored, his skin flushed from the exertion. "Hey," she returned, moving her coffee cup aside as she hooked her tablet up to the network. "Congratulations on your throw down. Or whatever it's called."

He grinned. "Thanks. Throw down works."

Pleased for him, she smiled. "How are you feeling?" Since Roy had started training with Oliver and Sara, he was learning to control his emotions a lot better.

He sat back. "Good. There are still tough moments, but I've been learning to channel my energy in better ways." He stared down at his hands, self-conscious. "You know, I think I'd have lost my mind by now if it hadn't been for Oliver."

Felicity filled with compassion. Roy was a good kid who'd had to deal with a lot in a reasonably short space of time. She was really proud of him for not giving up when things had become particularly tough. Having heard what the Mirakuru had done to Slade Wilson, she knew that the road ahead was going to be the most challenging of his life. He'd need all their support if he was going to make it.

"I'm glad you're here," she said sincerely, placing a hand comfortingly over his.

"Thanks."

Sensing his unease, she changed the subject. "How was dinner the other night?"

He looked relieved. "Boring. Not my kinda place, not my kinda food, definitely not my kinda crowd." She almost laughed at the pained expression on his face.

"But you went anyway. For Thea," she said, watching as a blush stained his cheeks. "That's really sweet."

Embarrassed, he deflected. "The pre-dinner entertainment made it all worth it."

Felicity felt the heat creep up the back of her neck. "It was nothing. Just a mis-"

"Understanding," Roy finished. The tone of his voice suggested that he thought it was anything but that. "I heard."

Not sure how to respond, Felicity pretended to scroll through her email.

"So, are you and Donner an item now, or what?" She thought she detected a hint of protectiveness in his voice.

Flashing a discreet look over her shoulder, she saw Sara ferociously attacking a punching bag. "I'm not sure." She stopped typing and turned her chair to face his. "I like him."

He looked a little shy, running a hand over the front of his short, spiky brown hair before mumbling, "He treating you okay?"

Touched by his concern, Felicity smiled. "Way above reproach." She paused. "I-I know that Thea must hate Adam because of Moira." She swiveled her chair back to face her tablet. "Oliver hates him too."

"Thea doesn't hate him. She's just a little wary. Don't worry about her." He lowered his voice and moved a little closer. "As for Oliver, he's just being a guy."

Felicity frowned. "Meaning?"

"What are you two whispering about?" Sara asked, touching the back of Felicity's chair and effectively putting a stop to that line of questioning.

Roy reached for his maroon jacket and put it on, zipping it up the front. "Just grilling Felicity on her new squeeze."

Her eyes on her computer screen, Felicity couldn't see Sara's face. "He seems nice," she said, her tone neutral.

Roy snorted in disgust. " _Nice_. I hate that word. It's so passive."

" _I_  never called him nice," Felicity corrected.

"Well, there you have it. Felicity's feelings for the DA is clearly anything  _but_  passive," Sara chipped in, amused.

Not sure she liked to be the topic of discussion, Felicity was about to say something when Roy glanced at the time. Standing, he swung his towel around the back of his neck. "Entertaining as this has been, Thea will be looking for me soon. I'll catch you guys later."

Felicity and Sara both watched him leave.

Feeling more than a little awkward now that Roy had left, Felicity pretended to get back to work. She didn't know which she preferred less: Being alone with Oliver, being alone with Sara or being alone with Oliver and Sara. Right now, she was leaning toward the middle one.

It wasn't that she disliked Sara; she genuinely didn't. In fact, she admired her a great deal. She was a strong, resourceful and capable woman. There was a lot about her that Felicity respected, even envied at times, despite the fact that she didn't actually want to  _be_  her. To have survived all those years away from home, the things she would have had to do to stay alive and the scars those choices must surely have left behind - Felicity didn't envy that.

But sometimes it was hard to be in the other woman's presence. Sara and Oliver shared something that neither she nor anyone else could ever fully understand. It's like they had their own language, operated on a unique level that must have been forged through years of mutual hardship and strife. That type of bond didn't just go away. The mere fact that they were now a couple was testament to its strength and just another one of the multiple reasons why Oliver never had and never would, see her as his equal.

"Why have you and Oliver never gotten together?"

"W-What?" So shocked by the bluntness of the question, Felicity unintentionally knocked her coffee off the table, sending a stream of toffee coloured liquid through the air and onto the floor. Flustered, she pushed her chair back and grabbed a clump of tissues, before bending down and dabbing frantically in an attempt to soak up the liquid.

Sara knelt down and used her towel to absorb the bulk of it. "Well?"

Felicity met her eyes and slowly rose to her feet. Sara followed, waiting. "Because…I'm not his type, obviously."

"But he's yours?" she probed. There was no censure in her tone, merely curiosity.

"No!" At Sara's direct gaze, she squirmed. "I-I mean of course he's attractive. We just wouldn't suit." She fidgeted with the now empty cup in her hands, leaning forward to throw it into the bin before rubbing her hands together awkwardly.

Sara threw the towel in the direction of a laundry basket. Her aim was perfect. Of course it would be. "He likes and admires you a lot."

"Which isn't the only factor to consider when looking to build a long term relationship." There was attraction and love and a whole host of other things that Oliver definitely didn't feel for her.

Sara's smile was swift and fleeting. "I've seen many relationships built on a heck of a lot less."

Felicity rubbed her hands down the front of her red dress, her palms perspiring. "Why are you asking me this?"

Leaning back against the table they generally used to test weapons, Sara reached up and tied her blonde hair into a loose knot. "I was curious. You've spent so much time together and yet nothing's ever happened?"

 _Not for Oliver at least_. "No, nothing. We're friends. That's all." Sara was looking at her so intently that Felicity had the disconcerting feeling that the other woman could see things that she'd prefer to keep hidden. "Besides, he's got you now."

"Why do you think Oliver dislikes seeing you with the DA so much?"

Felicity shrugged.  _What is this?_  "Because of his mother, I guess."

Sara remained silent for so long that Felicity thought the conversation was over.  _Prayed_ that it was over.

"It's not love, you know," she said softly.

Confused, Felicity asked, "Excuse me?"

"Oliver and I. It's not love. I care about him more than I've ever cared about anyone else. But I don't know if he loves me," she said quietly, folding her arms across her chest. "I don't know if either of us is truly capable of it."

Felicity tried to ignore the stabbing pains in the region of her heart. She couldn't shake the feeling that this was some kind of warning. "Sara, I don't understand why you're telling me any of this." The information seemed too personal and Felicity didn't want to know the inner workings of their relationship. While they were friendly, they definitely weren't  _friends_. At least not the kind that confided in one another. Especially about Oliver.

Footsteps came down the stairs. "Ladies, I brought lunch." Diggle walked in carrying a pizza box that smelled like pepperoni and cheese. For the second time that day a conversation she was having was cut short by the interruption of another person.  _Perhaps it's for the best._

Her phone beeped. Retrieving it, she saw a message from Adam. "SEE YOU IN 15. A"

Felicity gave Diggle an apologetic smile. "Sorry Dig, I have to go."

At his questioning glance, she explained, "Lunch plans."

He nodded at Sara. "More for us." He opened the box and grabbed a slice, offering some to Sara, all the while chatting about baseball scores.

Replying to Adam's message, Felicity was aware of Sara watching her. Pondering the strangeness of it all and deciding not to let it unnerve her, she continued to gather her things, wondering the entire time what the other woman was hoping to find.


	10. Chapter 10

Oliver parked his motorcycle across the road from Big Belly Burger and switched off the engine. Sara had asked him if they could meet for lunch since there was something she wanted to discuss with him. Upon further probing she'd declined to say much over the phone and had instead exacted his promise to meet with her.

Glancing at his watch, he noted that he was about ten minutes early. Loosening the clip beneath his chin, he removed his helmet and absently ran a hand over his head as he gazed around disinterestedly. There were people milling around going about their daily lives, paying him no attention. Most were striding past purposefully, eager to get to their destinations, while others were talking on their cell phones or strolling by in the company of friends.

Placing his helmet in front of him, he looked across the street toward the entrance to the diner. The lunch crowd would have dispersed already, which he preferred. He hated dining in crowded or confined quarters. The one thing Lian Yu had made him used to was space, and lots of it.

About to hop off his bike, he spotted a familiar purple coat on the opposite side of the road.  _Felicity._  He felt a wave of awareness wash over him at the sight of her. She was talking on her mobile, smiling at whomever was on the other end of the line. Seeing her made him pause. Under ordinary circumstances he would have strode up to her and asked what she was doing there. However, since their last encounter, he felt it best to practice more caution around her.

Dig's words to him had stung. He hated his best friend thinking that he was out to hurt Felicity's feelings; he wasn't. Well, he didn't know what it was that he wanted. For some reason, out of nowhere, the idea of Felicity actually seriously dating someone bothered him. Since the moment he'd recognized the beginnings of jealously clawing its way through him, he'd felt a desperate need to escape from it, to act as though it wasn't real. Except he hadn't been doing a very good job of that. If anything, he'd drawn more attention to it. So much so, that his family and friends were starting to ask questions that he couldn't answer. So was Sara.

Felicity wasn't just an employee, she was also a friend. Like Diggle, she was one of the only true friendships he had left. All the others were steeped in lies and secrets or a past that he could never quite escape. He trusted her completely and that dynamic added strength to their relationship. She called him on his hypocrisy, she kept him honest and she wasn't afraid to speak her mind – in her own rambling, yet courageous sort of way. Felicity may be shy and awkward at times, but she also possessed an inner strength and daring that he admired. She'd always been his quirky IT techie. The girl, who looked like a girl and acted like a girl, but who was more like one of the guys.

He smiled faintly, not sure that even made sense to him.

But things weren't that black and white to him anymore. There was a sensitivity he felt around her that had never been there before. Perhaps it was because his mind had never allowed him to think of her as anything other than a member of his team. If he'd noticed that she seemed to have a bit of a crush on him, he'd swept it aside and pretended it didn't exist. No harm done. He didn't need feelings and emotions getting in the way of his primary focus – fighting crime and saving lives.

But acting on any feelings he may have recently discovered was not an option. Not that he was really sure about  _what exactly_ he was feeling.

He shifted uncomfortably on his bike, admiring the way Felicity's blonde hair gleamed in the afternoon sunshine.

Or perhaps he just wasn't ready to put a label to them. Not when he'd fought so hard to keep his personal and his professional lives separate. Whoever he cared about was ultimately destined to end up hurt. Every relationship he'd ever had, he'd ruined to the point where it was barely salvageable at the end. The stakes had always been high - all or nothing. In the end, they'd walked away because he hadn't been able to give them what they'd needed.  _I couldn't save them._

Felicity…she was different. She wasn't Helena or McKenna or Laurel or even Sara. She wasn't damaged and in need of repair. She didn't need saving. The truth was that he didn't know how to be with anyone who didn't need him more than he needed them. So while he intellectually knew that he had no right to interfere in her personal life, that almost any other man would be ten times better for her than he was, the part of him that he didn't want to acknowledge because he was afraid of the repercussions, rebelled against having to share her. He knew it made him selfish, even irrational, but he couldn't help it.

Watching, he noticed that she stopped outside Big Belly and looked around, as though she was searching for someone. For a moment he wondered if perhaps she'd seen him, but when her eyes moved past without any hint of recognition, he sank back into his seat, irrationally disappointed. He wasn't used to feeling unsure of himself around Felicity.

Staying alive for five years on the island had meant doing whatever it took to get back home. Some of his actions still haunted his dreams and would most likely follow him to his grave. With Sara, it was easy. They understood each other, they'd been through similar experiences and neither of them viewed their relationship through rose-tinted glasses. He cared about her, deeply. But he wasn't a fool. He knew that neither of them expected what they had to last forever. There was passion, yes, and the comfort of having someone around who didn't ask any difficult questions. But there was no danger of unreasonable demands, of falling in love, of losing control. What they had suited them both and it would last for as long as they wanted it to. Should the day come that they parted ways, it would be as friends. There'd be no hatred, no ugly words, no recriminations and most importantly, no complications.

He was yanked back from his musings when Felicity turned suddenly as a sleek black sedan stopped beside the curb. When he saw who it was, he tensed immediately. Adam Donner stepped out of the driver's seat and was greeted by a beaming Felicity. That smile, aimed at the DA, made him slightly nauseas. Unused to the feeling of coveting what belonged to someone else, he hated himself for his weakness.

Wanting to turn away, but unable to, he couldn't miss the way Donner's hand lingered at her waist as he bent down and kissed her lips softly. The sight of it burnt a hole in the pit of his stomach, his hands clenching his helmet so tightly his knuckles started aching. A gust of wind passed by, swishing the ends of her red dress around her knees and causing a lock of hair to fall across her forehead. It took every ounce of his strength not to march across the road and shove his fist into the DA's face when he gently pushed the strands back behind her ear. The gesture was small, but so intimate that he felt as though he was intruding on something private. Despite the distance between them, he could see Felicity's blush, the crimson perfection of it nearly pushing him over the edge.

Tearing his gaze away from the couple, he stared straight ahead, unseeing. No matter how confusing his feelings or how much he detested the thought of her with someone else, the reality was that Adam Donner was probably twice the man he was. That alone, was reason enough for him to put an end to his ridiculous behaviour.

Angry at himself for the absurdity of his inconvenient desires, he knew that he'd never survive an entire meal in their presence. It  _would_  end badly. Grabbing his phone, he sent Sara a text and told her to meet him at the mansion instead. Placing his helmet back on, he started his bike, and sped off into the distance, denial hot on his heels.

* * *

Chomping on some fries, Felicity listened intently as Adam told her about the horrible morning he'd had. His voice, rich and melodic, was more than just passably pleasant. She liked that he never whinged or complained, merely reiterated the highlights of whatever he was dissatisfied with and moved on. He was proactive in nature, incapable of sitting back and letting others do his work for him. He was also tough and thorough, but not unfair.

Looking at him, strikingly handsome in a black pinstriped suit, she wasn't sorry that they'd met.

"Anyway," he said, taking a bite of his burger, "that's my morning. What have you been up to?"

Uncomfortable with having to lie to him, she decided to stick as close to the truth as possible. "Just fixing some network issues at QC." Which wasn't exactly a lie, she told herself.

He smiled, the blue of his tie perfectly complimenting his eyes. "Somehow I don't think it was quite as simple as you make it seem."

She rested her chin on her hands. "Oh?"

"For you it was probably child's play. For someone else, perhaps not so much."

Felicity appreciated that he respected her abilities and acknowledged that she was good at it. A lot of men were intimidated by smart females and she was glad that Adam wasn't one of them. "You're right of course," she said, thinking about how hard she'd worked to get everything at the foundry back up and running. "My talents were put to use in the most effective ways possible."

Suddenly, their attention was grabbed by a news broadcast booming throughout the diner. "The Starling City vigilante once again aided the SCPD in capturing notorious drug lord, Santiago Perez. Having evaded authorities for years and nearly tripling the amount of drugs sold in the Glades, the Colombian was finally caught red-handed smuggling a shipment of cocaine worth millions of Dollars into the city…."

Felicity knew about the arrest since Oliver had been the one to bring him to justice. Adam was watching the TV screen keenly. "You're going to have to prosecute Perez, aren't you?"

He nodded, wiping his ketchup stained fingers on a napkin. "The department has spent the past three years building a case against that guy, but we could never pin anything on him."

"Looks like the vigilante brought him to you," she said, trying to keep the pride out of her voice. Despite all their current drama, Oliver was saving their city, one criminal at a time.

"That he did."

"You don't sound very enthused," she said, noting the furrow between his brows.

Adam turned back to face her. "I take it you're one of his supporters?"

 _If only you knew._  She hedged. "I think he's done a lot of good work."

"I don't disagree with you. I just don't like the idea of some masked avenger taking the law into his own hands." He kept his tone neutral, even though she could sense that he felt passionately about it.

Felicity tried not to take offense on Oliver's behalf and tried to see things from his point of view. "Well," she replied, staying upbeat. "I can see why you'd feel that way. But don't you think the benefits outweigh the downside?"

He pushed his plate away from him, thinking. "If I thought that way, it would make me an advocate of any random person thinking they knew what was best for this city and acting on it. Granted, the Hood  _has_ done some good, particularly in the Glades, but at the same time, if we cut him some slack for being a hero, what's to stop the next guy? People could get hurt."

He had a valid point. "But the Hood isn't untrained. I mean, he clearly knows how to defend himself  _and_  keep others safe."

He shrugged, resting his arms on the table. "The law is my job, Felicity. And while I'd like to think that I'm one of the few people doing my job that sees the grey areas, I need to draw the line somewhere. Am I saying that I disapprove of him? Not entirely. Am I saying that I'm in support of him? Not entirely either."

That was at least better than she'd expected. But it still placed her in an awkward position. How did you go about having a relationship with someone when you couldn't be completely honest with them? She would have asked Oliver, since he had the most experience in that arena, but that was clearly not an option at the moment.

"Listen, I wanted to ask you something," Adam said, breaking her train of thought.

"I'm all ears."

He reached over and traced the outer shell of her lobe gently. She felt the caress down to her toes. "Such pretty ears too." He smiled at her blush. "Every year the department hosts a commemorative event for the families of any law enforcement officials who lost their lives in the line of duty. The gala is on Friday night. Would you like to be my plus one?"

Felicity smiled. She couldn't think of anything she'd like better. "I'd love to."

He reached for her hand and automatically their fingers entwined. "I was hoping you'd say that."


	11. Chapter 11

The Starling City Metropolitan Police Gala was held in the conservatory of the Botanical Gardens on the outskirts of town. Having been newly renovated by the Robert Queen Foundation, it was a spacious, lavish and decadent glass cocoon that had been transformed into an area large enough for dining as well as accommodating a generous dance floor and bar.

Feasting her eyes on the gleaming wooden floors and shiny candelabra that's long waxy candlesticks flickered brightly, casting enchanting shadows throughout the room, Felicity couldn't help feeling as though she'd stepped back in time. Even the band was playing music that was clearly suited to slow dancing rather than the fashionable tunes pumping out of clubs like Verdant. Overhead were stars clearly visible in the clear night sky and all around were the lush and fragrant gardens that were lovingly and fastidiously maintained.

"I take it you like what you're seeing?" Adam asked at her side, resplendent in a black tux.

Smiling up at him, she nodded enthusiastically. "It's so beautiful. I can't believe I've never been here before."

He reached for her hand and steered her through the crowd to an open side door. "Considering that this place has been under construction for the past year, I'm not surprised. Moira Queen is fitting the bill for tonight's festivities as a thank you to the Police Department for all their efforts this year. I'm sure it won't hurt her mayoral aspirations either," Adam ended cynically.

Startled, Felicity instinctively looked around.  _I should have known._  Since when did the SCPD have the resources for this kind of shindig? It had  _Queen_  stamped all over it. "I guess I should have realized."

Adam grabbed two glasses of champagne off the tray of a passing waiter and handed one to her. "You mean you didn't know?" He looked surprised.

Since she and Oliver talked on a need-to basis most of the time, his family's charitable pursuits weren't at the top of their discussion list. "I must have missed it somehow," she evaded, looking around at the smiling couples on the dance floor. Realising that Adam had gone silent, she turned to look at him and their eyes met. His stare was so intense that she felt a blush stain her cheeks.

His lips curved upward slowly. "You're beautiful."

The dress she'd chosen was a crimson, sweetheart neckline, figure hugging gown that followed her curves closely before flaring gently at the hips and falling in soft waves to the floor. It was simple and without embellishment so she'd paired it her favourite gold cascading teardrop earrings and a matching gold cuff. She'd opted to arrange her hair in loose curls, the shimmering mass falling around her shoulders and down her back.

"Thank you." His sincerity never failed to touch her. Sure that her face matched her dress, she leaned forward impulsively and kissed his smooth jaw.

Grinning, he placed his hand at the small of her back, the weight not at all unpleasant. "I wonder when your employers will be arriving?"

That was actually the thing Felicity was dreading. She was sure Oliver would bring Sara, which she didn't really have a problem with per se, they were  _together_. It was just that she saw them every day and it would be nice to be able to enjoy a night out without having to stare into their faces in her personal time as well.

Then there was Moira. The last conversation she'd had with the woman had been frosty, to say the least. She'd guessed that Felicity's feelings for Oliver were more than just platonic and had tried to use it as a way to manipulate her into keeping Thea's parentage a secret. Lying to Oliver had never even been an option. That's not how she operated and she'd known that if Oliver ever found out, it would have shattered the trust between them. Ultimately, despite everything, that was not something she was willing to risk.

"Oh, I think they just did." Judging by the commotion at the front of the room, and the perfectly coiffed blonde head bobbing through the crowd, it didn't take a rocket scientist to realise that the Queen's had landed. Beside Moira was Thea, looking stylish in what must have been a designer gown, a bright smile on her face as she tugged a decidedly uncomfortable looking Roy along behind her.

The sight made Felicity smile.

"What's so funny?" Adam asked.

Felicity nodded toward the young couple. "Roy. He looks like he's about to make a run for it."

Adam chuckled. "I don't think I've ever seen anyone look more pained."

"Roy's a good kid," she said fondly, watching as he mumbled hello's in every which way. "He's had a tough life, but Thea seems to have tamed him. They're so sweet together."

She felt Adam draw her closer to his side and she didn't resist, didn't want to. "Do you think we're sweet together?" he whispered close to her ear. Leaning back slightly to see his eyes, she saw the amusement twinkling in their depths.

"You don't make me feel sweet," she blurted, not feeling the least bit self-conscious.

His voice dropped an octave. "I should hope not."

Engrossed in one another they didn't hear Roy's approach until he cleared his throat. Adam took a small step back, but didn't remove his arm from the curve of her hip.

"Roy!" Watching him tugging at his bow tie, Felicity immediately felt sympathetic. "You're looking very handsome."

He rolled his eyes. "If this is the price of beauty, I'll pass."

"Adam," she said. "This is Roy Harper. Roy," she smiled and gestured towards the tall man at her side, "meet Adam Donner."

"Hey," Roy replied, grasping the DA's hand firmly while watching him closely, as though taking his measure. Adam's gaze didn't waver, sensing the younger man's protectiveness.

"I've heard a lot about you."

After what felt like minutes, but must have been mere seconds, Roy let go with a small nod. He grinned at her. "Knowing Felicity, it was probably all good."

She punched him playfully on the arm. "Behave. Why didn't you tell me you were coming tonight?"

He scowled. "Because I didn't know. Thea decided to fill me in on the last minute so I couldn't think of a reason to worm my way out of it."

Adam grimaced. "She's that scary?"

Roy nodded somberly. "You have no idea."

"Harsh," the DA replied with a low whistle.

"Hey! What is this? Boys-gang-up-on-girls-night?"

Roy shrugged. "The man understands my pain. Don't be a hater."

Felicity huffed and Adam laughed. "If it's any consolation, the gardens are gorgeous and would make a pretty decent refuge."

Roy peered over her shoulder into the moonlit gardens beyond. "Don't give me any ideas. Thea would skin me alive if I bailed." He ran a hand under his collar, seeking air.

"Stop fidgeting," Felicity said, amused.

"You would too if you were strapped into a monkey suit," he retorted, reluctantly letting go of his collar. "How anyone finds this get-up comfortable is beyond me." He glanced at Adam. "No offence, or anything."

Adam raised a hand conciliatorily. "None taken."

Grabbing a glass of champagne, Adam handed it to Roy. "I think you need this. Incoming."

"There you are! Ollie's just arrived," Thea said, hooking her arm into Roy's. She was stunning in a bronze, one shoulder, sequined metallic dress that was both youthful and edgy. Felicity couldn't help noticing the loving look Roy sent Thea's way. Whatever he might say, she knew he'd do anything for the youngest Queen.

Glancing discreetly in the direction of the entrance, Felicity didn't see Oliver anywhere. Relieved, she said, "Thea, this is Adam-"

"Donner," she said, finishing Felicity's sentence and staring at the man who'd tried to stick her mother in jail.

Felicity felt a moment's unease. She didn't want things to become ugly. "Look-"

Thea waved a hand dismissively. "It's okay. That's all over with now and I'm sure it wasn't personal, right?" The question was directed at Adam.

He shook his head. "No ma'am. Just doing my job."

"Rather well, even if I do say so myself," Thea replied, sardonically. "Although I don't think my Mom-"

Roy cut her off by jabbing her gently in the ribs.

"Ow! What?" she asked, looking around before her eyes widened in recognition. "Mom!"

Felicity felt her body stiffen instinctively as Moira Queen walked around her and joined their circle.

"Miss Smoak," the matriarch said coolly. "I didn't expect to see you here."

"Felicity accompanied me," Adam replied on her behalf and then added courteously, "It's nice to see you again, Mrs. Queen."

Moira ignored him and focused her attention on Felicity. "I see. So this is the company you keep. Does my son know?"

"Mom!" Thea replied, shocked.

Stunned that Moira would deliberately snub Adam, Felicity unconsciously moved closer to him. "Who I spend my private time with is none of Oliver's concern," she replied, raising her chin defiantly.

Moira looked her over; clearly finding her lacking if the subtle tightening around her mouth was any indication. "Well, there really is no accounting for taste."

Felicity felt Adam tense beside her at the insult. Knowing that he wouldn't let the comment slide, she glared at Moira, hating the glint of satisfaction she saw in the older woman's eyes, before grasping his hand and smiling at Thea and Roy politely. Out of the corner of her eye, she could see Oliver heading their way. "We're going to dance."

As she brushed past Roy, she heard him whisper to Thea, "Your mother is a piece of work, you know that?"

Furious, she avoided Oliver's eyes as she led Adam onto the dance floor. Easing into his arms, she could feel the tension holding his body captive.

"You shouldn't have hightailed us out of there. I was looking forward to putting her on her place." His voice was brimming with anger.

Taking a deep breath, Felicity tried to focus her thoughts. "Making a scene wouldn't have accomplished anything. I generally prefer taking the high road."

"I don't like the way she spoke to you," he said softly.

Melting a little inside, Felicity rested her cheek on his chest. "I can handle Moira Queen." She couldn't really, but saying it made her feel better. "Besides, what she thinks has no bearing on us."

"Still," he said, raising her chin until their eyes met. "If she ever treats you like that again, I won't walk away."

He didn't say anything more as they swayed together, Felicity feeling more cherished and cared for than she had in a very long time.

Her eyes scanning the room idly, they came to a grinding halt on Oliver and Sara. Like Roy, despite the fancy clothes, she looked completely out of place. She was a beautiful woman, but her unease was palpable, even from Felicity's vantage point. Her body language was rigid and defensive, her arms crossed protectively across her chest. The way she kept switching her weight from one leg to another, indicated that her black stilettos were clearly not her daily choice of footwear. Similarly, the black strappy gown she was wearing looked like something straight out of Laurel's closet and as a result didn't seem to suit Sara at all. If there was one thing Felicity knew, it was that the Lance sisters were nothing alike.

Sara was standing slightly turned away from them, chatting to Oliver's mother and sister. He, however, looking as gorgeous as ever in his black formals, was standing at the edge of the dance floor, his eyes firmly fixed on her.


	12. Chapter 12

Oliver stepped out of the back of the expensive sedan Diggle had parked at the entrance to the Botanical Gardens, closed the button on his tuxedo jacket and extended a hand to help Sara out of the car. He would have happily given this event a miss, but his mother had insisted that they show a united family front in lieu of her campaign to become mayor.

"Ollie, slow down!" Sara called, rushing after him. She was holding onto his arm with one hand and keeping her dress off the ground with the other. "How does Laurel walk on these things?" she mused in frustration, glaring at the dangerously high heels she was wearing.

Oliver slackened his pace and smiled at her. "Thank you for coming with me. I know you would have preferred not to."

She didn't contradict him, merely tilted her lips up slightly at the corners. "My Dad's a cop. I know why this is important."

Although Sara would look beautiful in a brown bag, he could tell that she wasn't comfortable. Before that fateful night on the Queen's Gambit, she'd been the life of every party. She'd loved to drink and dance and socialise. But after everything that she'd been through, her old life and the habits that had once been an innate part of her held very little appeal. He'd felt the same way right after his return, but as time had passed and the expectations of his family name had come calling, he'd slipped back into the role he'd been born to fulfill. Eventually, it had become easier and he hoped the same would be true for Sara.

They still hadn't had a moment to talk about whatever had been troubling her since their afternoon meeting had been interrupted by some urgent Hood business. Since then, things had been a bit crazy for both of them; the pressures of their day jobs, being vigilantes by night and their respective family commitments meant that they had very little spare time left over for one another. He'd thought about asking her about it, but he knew her well enough to know that she'd raise it when she was ready so he'd decided to let it go for the moment.

"Ready?" At her nod, he placed his hand over hers as they stepped inside the brightly lit room. A cursory glance around confirmed his suspicions: The planning and décor had clearly been his mother's idea. It screamed understated elegance, a hallmark that Moira Queen prided herself on.

"They're over there," Sara whispered, gesturing towards the open side door furthest away from them.

Shaking hands with a few senior ranking officials, Oliver followed her lead, spotting his family easily. To his surprise, he recognized Felicity and Adam Donner standing with them. The streak of annoyance that lanced through him at the sight of the DA situated so close to the woman who had his emotions in knots lately, escalated rapidly when he spied the possessive hand Donner had on her waist. The fact that Felicity hadn't shrugged it off wasn't lost on him. Jealously, thick and raw, flooded his system. Not liking it one bit, he dragged Sara toward them, all the while trying to get his feelings under control.

The closer they drew, the more evident it became that all was not well. Felicity stood rigidly, staring at his mother, whose serene outlook hid the malevolence concealed beneath the façade. Donner, on the other hand, looked furious. Sensing that a confrontation was imminent, he lengthened his stride.

Suddenly, Felicity grabbed Donner's hand and pulled him towards the dance floor. Stopping automatically as she walked in his direction, he expected her to acknowledge him, but was left frustrated when she didn't even look his way. Sara, who he'd momentarily forgotten about, crashed into his back.

"Ollie, dammit!"

Reluctantly moving his eyes away from Felicity, he gave Sara an apologetic look. "Sorry. For a moment I thought my mother and the DA were coming to blows."

"What happened?" she asked, looking around his shoulder in time to see the couple heading away from his family.

"I'm not sure. But the look on my mother's face had me worried." It shouldn't have come as a surprise that there'd be no love lost between his parent and the man who'd tried to imprison her.

By the time they reached Thea and Roy, Moira was half turned away from them, deep in conversation with the Police Commissioner. Oliver kissed his sister's cheek.

"Roy, you look great," Sara said, giving him a thumbs up.

He gave her an uncomfortable smile. "This is all Thea. Trust me."

The younger woman ignored the fact that he didn't sound too enthusiastic and patted his arm affectionately. "I have excellent taste," she declared, proudly.

Annoyed at their chatter and sounding more composed than he actually felt, Oliver asked, "What just happened before we arrived?"

Roy spoke first. "Your mother not so subtly laid into Felicity for being here with the DA."

Oliver couldn't hide his surprise. "Felicity?" he echoed, confused. He'd assumed that his mother had been gunning for Donner.

"Yeah," Thea piped up. "She was unexpectedly mean to her and I don't know why. It's weird, but she seemed more pissed off at Felicity than she did with Adam."

Finally it all made sense. His mother blamed Felicity, not herself, for the distance between them lately. Ever since he'd confronted Moira about Thea's real father, their relationship had suffered a great deal. Typical of his mother to lay the blame for that at someone else's doorstep. Anger surged through him. Whatever issues they had as a family, the fault didn't lie with Felicity or anyone else.

"What did Moira say to her?" Sara asked, curiosity embedded in her question.

Roy leaned closer to them, lowering his voice so that it didn't carry. "It wasn't so much what she said, but the way she said it. She sounded," he thought for a moment, "cold. Did Felicity piss her off at work or something?"

Everyone's eyes focused on Oliver. "I don't know," he replied, instinctively. Naturally he couldn't tell them what he really suspected the cause to be.

Thea shrugged and looked at the dancing pair. "They do look cute together, don't they?"

Roy guffawed. "Can you imagine Felicity as a DA's wife?"

"What?!" Oliver didn't mean for his response to come so quickly or to sound so impassioned. Was Felicity getting married? The very thought sent his mind reeling and his stomach plummeting to the ground.

Sara looked at him sharply, but didn't say anything.

Startled by his reaction, Thea stared and Roy's mouth gaped open. "Dude, it was a joke. Relax."

Oliver exhaled slowly, trying to slow the rhythm of his pounding heart. In an attempt to smooth over his misstep, he smiled. "You caught me by surprise. I know they aren't  _that_ serious."

Thea linked her arm through Roy's and glanced back at the dance floor. "I don't know. They look pretty serious to me." Suddenly distracted, she stepped closer to Sara as Moira rejoined their group. "I've been meaning to ask you…"

His sister's voice trailed away as he, unable to stop, turned to face the couple moving in tune to the music. Felicity had her head resting on Donner's shoulder as though she belonged there. The notion landed like a lump of lard in the pit of his belly, unsettling him. Hating himself for watching and yet unable to pull himself away, he eyes wandered over her halo of hair, tumbling like gentle waves around her face and shoulders. The dress, or more accurately,  _Felicity in the dress_ , was flawless.

Donner said something that made her laugh and she moved her head to rest against his jaw as her eyes scanned over the crowd. He tensed as it swept closer to him, knowing he should turn away before she caught him watching her.

He tried.

He failed.

Their eyes locked and hers registered surprise and then something else that she masked so quickly he didn't have enough time to decipher it. He knew that he was playing with fire and Dig's words, spoken just a few short days before, came back to haunt him.  _You could do much worse by unintentionally giving her the idea that you feel more than you actually do just because you don't like the thought of having to share her with someone else._  That wasn't it though. Looking into the astonishing blueness of her direct gaze, he knew that it was way more than that. Sharing Felicity wasn't the problem. It was sharing her with a romantic rival that was. Despite all his best efforts, he'd landed himself in some hot water. Tearing his eyes from hers, he turned around to face his mother.

"I saw your father as I arrived. He's looking well," she was saying to Sara.

"Mom, can we talk for a minute?" Oliver asked, grasping her elbow, his hold gentle yet firm.

She must have seen the determined glint in his eyes, because for once she didn't argue. "Excuse us," she said politely to the rest of their group before allowing him to steer her outside.

The weather was pleasant and there were a few people mulling about taking in some fresh air.

"Oliver, what is the matter with you? It's almost time for me to make my speech."

Coming to a halt at the foot of the stairs that lead into the garden beyond, he faced her. "Stay away from Felicity," he said without preamble, his voice cool and detached.

Her eyes flashed briefly. "I don't think I know what you mean."

Oliver gave a humourless laugh. "Oh, I think that you do."

She stood straighter and glanced towards the door where Sara was watching them intently. "I don't trust her, Oliver, and I think you should choose your friends-"

" _You_  don't trust her?" he retorted, fighting to keep his voice even. "You don't have to. Felicity is my friend and she obviously respects me a hell of a lot more than my own mother does."

Moira's face drained of colour. "I've explained to you a thousand times why I didn't tell you about Malcolm."

"Exactly.  _You_  didn't tell me, Mother. It was supposed to have come from you. Do you have any idea how it feels to know that after all this time, after all we've been through, that you'd still choose to lie to me about something so important?"

His mother reached for his arm, but he moved away from her. "Oliver, please," she begged. "I did it to protect you and Thea. I never meant to hurt you. Please believe me."

"Leave Felicity alone," he stated clearly, ignoring her words. "She has nothing to do with any of this and by implicating her in it, you stand to gain nothing." Turning on his heel, he started walking away.

"She's not the one for you, you know." His mother called after him, causing him to falter and stop. He didn't turn to face her, just stood still. "I've seen how you've been looking at her lately, how your eyes follow her around the room. You may have Sara fooled, but I'm your mother, I know you."

He could hear her approaching. "She's sweet and smart, I'll give her that, but it would never work out. You're too different and in the end, even though you would try not to, you'd only hurt her. Walk away, Oliver," she declared, emphatically. "For both your sakes."

His fists clenched at his sides, he turned his head slightly so he could see the shadow of her profile. "Forgive me for not taking the advice of the one woman who's turned lying and manipulation into an art form."

He heard her wounded gasp as he walked away and for a moment, he regretted hurting her. She wasn't the only one who had secrets. So did he and perhaps his mistakes were far worse than hers could ever be, but he'd hated how her words has pierced his armour and reached into his very soul. They were the exact fears that he secretly harboured and refused to acknowledge. If he pretended that he didn't feel them, then maybe he could fool himself into believing that a platonic friendship with Felicity was all he really wanted.

Walking back into the room that had become more crowded, he spotted Sara dancing with her father. Looking around, he watched as Donner turned away from Felicity to join a much older man in conversation.

Knowing better, but throwing caution to the wind regardless, he approached her from behind.

"Felicity, may I have this dance?"


	13. Chapter 13

Felicity couldn't have been more surprised if a dinosaur had fallen through the glass ceiling. Oliver was asking her to dance.  _Oliver,_  was asking  _her,_ to dance. She'd caught him looking at her earlier and chalked it down to his issues with Adam. It wasn't as though he had any other reason for disapproving of her newfound relationship. After all, he was there with his current lady friend, who judging by his track record, was most likely not going to be his last.

"Why?" came her suspicious reply. This wasn't the norm. They'd been at events together before and he'd never asked her to dance.

His eyes dared her to refuse him. "You're here, I'm here and our partners are engaged elsewhere." Wanting to prove his point, he stepped aside and gestured toward Sara and Adam, both of whom were occupied with other people.

He was right, of course. Adam had been called aside by a previous client and while he'd wanted to decline, Felicity had assured him that she could occupy herself without him for a few minutes. She hadn't expected this.

Swallowing her sudden bout of nerves, she pushed a loose curl behind her ear self-consciously. "I-I don't think that's a good idea." The last time she'd been close to him, she'd landed in his lap. The mere memory flooded her stomach with butterflies.

"It's just a dance, Felicity," he replied, teasingly, extending his hand towards her. Standing in the middle of the room, in full view of everyone, she couldn't very well refuse him.

Against her better judgment, she placed her hand in his, allowing him to lead her into the throng of dancing twosomes while trying not to become aware of how warm his touch was or how his large, calloused palm dwarfed her fingers. Turning her easily, he caught her in the circle of his arms, his hand like a burning brand at her waist. Even on heels, he was still taller than her and she couldn't help but note how their mouths lined up almost perfectly.  _This is not a good idea._

For a moment he didn't say anything, just held her close as they gently swayed in a small circle. "I'm sorry about my mother," he finally voiced quietly, close to her ear. The tender waft of his breath against her neck sent a shiver down her spine.

Trying desperately to hold on to her self-control, she tilted her head back to look at him. "How do you know about that?"

"I saw you with her when I arrived. With the help of Thea and Roy it didn't take much to put the puzzle pieces together."

She nodded. "I knew she'd be upset that I'd told you."

His voice was almost muffled against her hair. "Why did you?"

"Because I'd never deliberately lie to you about something so important," she answered honestly.

He looked at her then and she was once again taken aback by just how good looking he was. The dark shadow that clung to his jaw only seemed to emphasize his raw masculinity.

"Thank you," he said, sincerely. The warmth that laced his tone stirred something in her that needed to be kept on lock down for her own protection.

Felicity broke eye contact first. "Y-You don't have to apologise on her behalf. She obviously hates that her secret has created a rift between the two of you."

She didn't think he realized that the pad of his thumb was casually caressing the side of her finger in slow loops. She would have told him to stop but she didn't want to draw his attention to it lest he started asking questions about why it bothered her.

Oliver's eyes hardened a fraction. "Did she threaten you?"

"No!" Felicity burst forth quickly. Too quickly.

Instinctively his hand tightened at her waist as he stared at her silently, waiting for her to elaborate.

 _Darn!_ She couldn't exactly tell him that his mother had realized she had feelings for him. That's right, she thought.  _Had_. Past tense.

"Really, it was nothing, Oliver. There were no threats." At his raised eyebrow, she amended, "Okay, so she may have hinted that it would be in my best interests not to tell you, but I honestly don't think she meant to hurt me or anything like that."

The tick in his jaw indicated that he was none too pleased. "What  _exactly_ did she say?"

Felicity blanched. "Err…I can't remember…exactly," she hedged, the last word coming out on a squeak.

Oliver sighed heavily, looking ready to do battle. "Feli-"

Without thinking, she placed a hand on his chest to placate him. "Oliver, it's okay. Really. I was a little upset earlier because of the way your mom treated Adam and I, but in a way, I get it. No permanent damaged caused."

They were staring at each other, his eyes searching hers for something she refused to give away. Suddenly the rest of the room melted into insignificance and it was just the two of them, turning slowly, her hand absorbing the heat radiating from the solid wall of his chest. She'd touched him many times before when he'd needed patching up, but this didn't feel the same; it felt new, different,  _intimate._ Slowly, they twirled, their feet barely moving, their eyes locked. Unconsciously her fingers curled against his shirt, trying to trap the heat within her palm, an imaginary keepsake of a time that would surely never come again.

"Felicity," he started, her name low and deep, "I-"

"The music stopped a minute ago," came a voice from beside them. Spell broken, Felicity pulled away from Oliver only to be confronted by an irate Sara and a confused looking Adam.

Flustered and embarrassed, she took an extra step away from Oliver for good measure. "S-Sara, I um, didn't see you there."

"I kinda noticed," the other woman retorted, her voice dripping with sarcasm.

Oliver recovered and stepped over to Adam, extending his hand. "Nice to see you again."

Taken aback at the friendly display, the DA returned the gesture automatically. "Likewise," he replied coolly, his eyes darting between Felicity and Oliver with unease.

Feeling more than a little awkward, Felicity grabbed Adam's arm. "I'm thirsty. Would you like something to drink?"

He agreed and followed her to the bar. All the way over there, she could feel two pairs of eyes trained on her. Sara's she knew were angry and assessing, but Oliver's…  _Stop!_  She'd promised herself that she was over trying to figure him out. Mentally shaking herself, she forged ahead, fighting every step of the way to keep from glancing back.

* * *

 

Oliver stood staring after Felicity, trying to shake the feeling that something fundamental had changed between them. He couldn't explain what had just happened, other than admitting to himself that asking her to dance had been the worst thing he could possibly have done. He should have known that impulsive decisions always lead to regrets.

All he knew was that one moment they'd been dancing and the next he'd noticed that her hair smelled like fresh vanilla, that the palm of her hand fit perfectly inside his, that his heartbeat had accelerated to a gallop when she'd placed her hand over his heart. Worse still was the moment he'd started wondering what her scarlet tinged lips would taste like.  _What the hell is wrong with me?_

He felt feverish and restless, the confines of the swarming room suddenly stifling, making it hard to breathe. Remembering that he wasn't alone, he turned to see Sara walking away from him towards her father.

Closing his eyes briefly, he cursed beneath his breath. "Sara!" he called, following her through the crowd.

She stopped so abruptly he almost knocked her over. "I think I'm going to ask my Dad to give me a ride home."

He touched her arm, but she flinched away. He cursed again. "That's not necessary. I brought you here-"

"Do you even know what you want, Ollie?" she burst out unexpectedly, her voice rising. "You tell me that you want us to be together, but when I see you with Felicity, the way you look at her, I wonder why we're even doing  _this_."

"Sara, this is not the time or the place to be having this conversation." He didn't fail to notice the attention they were drawing.

For a split second she looked around too. "I'm going with my Dad," she repeated, with more care this time. She didn't seem angry anymore, merely resigned.

Sara knew that he wouldn't argue the point there, so he let her go. "Okay. But promise me that you'll let me know when you get home?"

She nodded and turned to leave before whirling back swiftly. "Maybe we should take some time apart," she said, silencing him with her finger when he started to speak. "There shouldn't be any lies between us, Ollie. We've been through too much together. You need to decide what it is that you want and when you do, you know where to find me."

Reaching up, she kissed his cheek softly before disappearing into the masses.

What did he want? He didn't know anymore. Once it had all been so simple. He didn't know when everything had become so complicated. Confused and frustrated and feeling oddly empty he saw Felicity and Adam holding hands at the bar, their heads bowed close together. The sight caused a pang deep within his chest.

When had he started wanting the one thing that had always been within his reach but he'd been too blind to see it? It was beyond ironic that he was starting to see at the very moment when what he was beginning to realize he wanted was farther away from him than ever before.


	14. Chapter 14

Felicity clutched Adam's hand snugly as he walked her to her apartment door. The night had started off wonderfully, then turned slightly bizarre, but was thankfully back on track. The whole incident with Oliver had already been banished to the back of her mind, where it belonged. She'd assured Adam that there was nothing going on between them, that there'd never been, and she hadn't lied.

Whatever Oliver seemed to be going through, she wasn't naïve enough to believe that it had anything to do with her. This was the usual pattern of his behavior and she hated that it was so predictable. Perhaps he was over the whole Sara thing or maybe he was just running scared. After all, it wouldn't be the first time. Regardless of his motives, she was tired of caring. If tonight had reaffirmed anything, it was that Oliver Queen could be the height of charm and attentiveness when it suited him but that didn't mean that his emotions were involved. She wasn't going to fall victim to his magnetism again only to have her heart broken down the line. She'd learnt her lesson.

As they reached her door Felicity dug into her purse and extracted her keys. She felt oddly nervous, which was ridiculous. She'd been out with Adam before, but this was the first time he'd been on the threshold of her home. Her heart sped up slightly at the thought.

"I-I had a wonderful time," she said, turning to face him, her keys dangling between her fingers.

The intense look in his eyes scorched her all the way down to her toes. "Trust me, the pleasure was all mine."

Blushing, she fumbled for something to say, her mind hitting a complete blank when Adam took a step closer. His movement was slow and deliberate, allowing her time to decide whether she was comfortable with the obvious overture or not. Felicity liked that about him. He never took her acquiescence for granted. He always let her choose.

She swallowed, her throat suddenly dry. "Thank you for inviting me," she expressed softly. "I don't usually attend such fancy dos because I have no reason to. I-I mean, I'm not rich and famous or anything like…" her voice trailed away as Adam's snow white shirt bushed against her midriff. He was  _that_  close.

His low chuckle, mingled with his hand at her waist, drawing her against him, caused a riot of butterflies to take flight within her stomach. The fingers of his free hand trailed down the side of her cheek slowly, coming to rest at her chin. His eyes locked with hers, his mouth lowering by torturous degrees, stopping mere inches away. Felicity could feel the warmth of his breath as it fanned across her lips, her entire body taunt with anticipation.

"You outshone every woman there. Rich or not," he declared huskily.

She melted inside, unable to think. " _Please,_ " she whispered, uttering the one word she knew he'd understand.

Their lips met and she sighed with pleasure. His were as she remembered; firm, yet gentle as he pulled her even closer, their bodies straining against each other. His mouth was hot and coaxing, urging her to open up and allow him access. Granting his wish, Felicity's eyes fluttered closed as she was swept away on a tide of delicious sensation as his tongue explored the moist cavern of her mouth. Unconsciously, her keys slipped from her fingers, falling noiselessly onto the carpeted floor, while her purse, long forgotten, fell to join them. As though they had a will of their own, her hands moved to tangle into the back of his hair, the stands so soft and silky smooth.

Up on her toes, she cradled his head in her palms, delighted when she heard his low moan of desire. Slanting his mouth across hers, he plunged forth, his kiss growing more ardent, more demanding.  _She_  was doing that to him. Felicity Smoak was making Adam Donner lose control. The very idea thrilled her to the depths of her soul.

Flushed and filled with wanting, she shivered delightfully as she felt his hands move restlessly over her back. Wrapping her arms around his neck to keep him close, his hands moved upward to cup her cheeks. Slowly, (and clearly reluctantly judging by his groan of frustration) he lifted his lips from hers. Her eyes popped open to meet his penetrating gaze, their breathing ragged.

His forehead resting against hers, he smiled wistfully. "You have no idea how much I want to carry you inside and have my wicked way with you, but it's not the right time yet."

Felicity trembled, blushing profusely as she remembered where they were. She wanted to say something, but her mind was in a whirl, no words coming to her aid.

Adam's voice was soft and tender as he continued, "When we decide to take that step, I want to know that we're both doing it for the right reasons and that there are no ghosts hovering in the shadows."

Holding onto his forearms, she whispered, "I explained about Oliver…"

He shook his head. "I know you did. But I won't take advantage of you, Felicity. You have nothing to prove to me and I'm happy to wait until you're 100% ready because I have no doubts that you're 100% worth it."

Her heart swelling inside her chest, she reached up and kissed him gently on his lips. "You're an incredible man, Adam Donner."

He grinned. "Believe me, when I'm lying alone in my bed tonight, those words will be cold comfort."

Felicity laughed, taking a step backward. She understood what he had implied when he'd said they should wait. It wasn't that she'd been planning to invite him in, it was too soon, but it pleased her to know that he wanted to take things slowly. It made her feel like he valued her more.

Bending down, he retrieved her purse and keys, using the latter to open her apartment door before handing both back to her. With a gentle nudge, he directed her through the entrance.

Smiling impishly, his hair adorably tousled, he pushed away from the wall. "Sweet dreams," he murmured, making sure she was standing on the opposite side of the threshold before he turned and walked away.

Sinking against the back of her closed door, Felicity placed a hand over her lips and smiled.

* * *

Oliver walked into Verdant filled with restless energy. The previous night had been a bit of a disaster and he wasn't quite sure what to do or how he was supposed to feel. He'd tried talking to Sara again once he'd gotten home, but she'd been adamant that they needed to give one another some space. Of course that didn't mean that he wouldn't see her, they still had work to do as a unit, but it meant that they'd keep things strictly professional for a while – or at least until they knew exactly where they stood with one another.

"Ollie? Is that you?" As he rounded the corner into the club's bar area, he saw Thea sitting on a high stool craning her neck in his direction.

"Hey," he replied, kissing her cheek fondly.

She sat back. "You seem…different," she commented, tilting her head slightly while she observed him, a faint smile hovering over her lips.

Oliver deflected, turning his back to her while he pretended to look over a stock sheet. "You and that over-active imagination of yours."

"That is not a denial," Thea remarked astutely. "Does it have anything to do with Felicity?"

He turned back, his eyes shuttered. "Why would you say that?"

Thea raised an eyebrow, folding her arms across the chest of her pale mint shift dress. "Maybe because Sara left with her Dad last night?" She swiveled her chair around until she sat facing him. "Or maybe because there was some definite eye-humping happening on the dance floor – with someone  _other_  than your girlfriend?"

Oliver choked slightly, uncomfortable with her line of questioning. "I don't know what that means," he stated, lifting his hand to stop Thea from speaking again, "and I don't want to know."

Undeterred, she forged ahead. "Are you denying that something happ-" Thea's mobile rang. Annoyed she peered at the screen. "I have to take this call but don't you dare move!" she ordered, walking into the next room.

Relieved that she'd been distracted, Oliver made his escape and headed down to the foundry. His mind was a jumbled mess of thoughts that he wasn't sure he could handle. He didn't have time to wallow around or dissect feelings that had crept up on him so unexpectedly. Yet despite knowing that, it was  _all_  he thought about; Sara and Felicity…

The latter was the hardest part. Lately he'd been experiencing emotions that she'd never roused in him before – jealously, impulsiveness, irrationality, want – some of which he'd never felt for anyone. He didn't know what had brought it on or for how long it was supposed to last, but he knew he couldn't ignore it anymore in the hopes that it would simply go away.

Descending the steps two at a time, he found Diggle sitting alone in front of the computer terminals.

"Where's everyone?"

"Out," Diggle said, pushing his chair back so he could get a better look at Oliver. "Sara and Roy where practicing hand-to-hand combat earlier. You've just missed them in fact."

"How's he doing?" Oliver asked, leaning back against the desk, his ankles crossed over each other.

"I'm impressed. Sara's really patient with him and he's catching on a lot faster than I thought he would."

Oliver looked around the room, trying to appear nonchalant. "And Felicity?"

"Breakfast with the DA." Diggle raised an eyebrow but didn't say what he was thinking.

Jaw clenching reflexively at the response, Oliver folded his arms across his chest. "Good."

"Good," Diggle echoed, a look of disbelief marring his dark features.

Feeling on edge, Oliver pushed away from the desk and walked over to inspect his arrow case. "Dig?" he asked, hesitatingly.

"Yeah?"

This was harder than he thought. While he could talk to Diggle about work situations easily, he found it difficult to open up to anyone about his personal thoughts. Despite that, he knew he'd try because if he didn't speak to someone he was likely to lose his mind. He trusted the other man more than anyone else, with the exception of Felicity, who he clearly couldn't discuss his current dilemma with since she was at the very heart of it.

"Sara and I had an argument last night," he started.

He heard Diggle move to sit up straighter. "I kinda figured something happened since you went home alone. Thea-" Diggle sounded a tad sheepish, "might have mentioned what it was all about."

Oliver picked up an arrow, gripping it tightly in his hand but didn't turn around. "What did she say?"

"That you danced with Felicity and seemed to get a little carried away." The disapproval was unmistakable.

He closed his eyes, silent for a moment, not exactly sure how to proceed.

"Oliver?" Diggle asked, his voice hard, despite the hint of sympathy Oliver thought he detected. "What are you doing, man? And listen, I'm only asking because you seem to want to talk. But if I'm wrong, then now would be a good time to tell me."

He had an out, but he didn't take it. Oliver turned, frustration evident in very line of his body. "Lately things have been a little confusing. I'm  _with_  Sara, but I'm  _thinking_ about Felicity. It's making me do things..."

Diggle sat back and watched him. "Felicity has been with us for a long time. She's the one that keeps us going, that greases the engine of this well oiled machine." He let that sink in. "I've watched you two together a thousand times and I've never seen you behaving towards her the way you have lately."

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Oliver shook his head, attempting to clear it. "I wish I had answers, Dig. One day she was just Felicity and the next…it was like my eyes truly opened for the first time."

Despite visibly bristling, Diggle managed to keep his tone neutral. "Don't make this about Donner because he's the only thing that's changed in her life. The second she became less available, was the same second you started having all these  _feelings_."

He knew that Diggle meant well, but the implication still stung. "I'm not being selfish, at least not deliberately. I'm not trying to keep her all to myself."

His friend stood up and walked over to him. "Aren't you? Because from where I'm standing, you're doing a great job of being selfish, impulsive and irrational all rolled into one not-so-great package. And do you know who's on the losing end of your ego? Felicity."

Oliver glared, hating the ring of truth to Diggle's words. "This is not about my ego, it's about-" He stopped, not sure what to say.

"You don't even know, do you?" Diggle asked in disbelief. "You have no clue what's going on here."

Unable to refute the claim, Oliver threw the arrow he'd been holding in a death grip onto the opposite table in irritation. "I'm trying to be honest here, Dig."

"Then tell me this: What about Sara?"

He looked the other man in the eye. "What about her?"

Diggle snorted. "You don't get it. This is as much about Sara as it is about you. Are you even thinking about anyone but yourself? You do realize that practically every relationship you've ever had started because another one ended just moments before?"

"You're exaggerating," Oliver argued, offended.

"You know I'm right. But this situation is not the same as all the others. I won't let it be. I know these women, Oliver. I know them personally and I happen to like and respect them. I won't stand by and watch you throw the one over so that you can hastily hook up with the other, only to repent at leisure later on." Diggle was standing directly in front of him, clearly up for a confrontation.

Incensed, Oliver ran a hand over his face. "I wouldn't do that."

"No? Then I suggest you do the right thing and sort out your relationship with Sara  _before_  you attempt to explore your attack of feelings for Felicity."

Despite the harsh delivery, Oliver knew that Diggle was right. Sara deserved better than waiting for him to decide what it was that he wanted. "I'll talk to her. I just need some time to work through this before I make any decisions."

"I'm down with whichever way you want to handle this, but I want you to remember that you can't suddenly want Felicity purely because she's no longer available. She's not one of your conquests that you throw by the wayside when it's over. She's not like that.  _She deserves better_."

"You think I don't know that?!" Oliver exploded, anger rushing to the fore. "You think I don't know that she's different to every other woman I've ever met? That she deserves better than a broken man who can't offer her any of the things that  _she_ values? Intellectually, I know that Donner is better for her, but I can't…I can't stop thinking about her, Dig." As suddenly as his anger appeared, it vanished. Walking over to the chair Diggle had vacated earlier, he sank into it, head in hands. "I'm not trying to hurt her. I would never deliberately hurt Felicity."

Pulling up a chair next to him, Diggle sat down and placed a comforting hand on Oliver's shoulder. "Look, all I'm trying to make you realize is that your thoughtless and reckless behavior around her is not going to score you any points. If anything, it's going to make her more resolved. She knows you; she's seen you in action. She knows how you operate and she knows that she's worth more than that – which is why your current Neanderthal approach will never work with her. If you care about her at all, you'll put  _her_  needs before your own. You'll do what's best for  _her_ , regardless of what  _you_  want – because that's what love is, Oliver - it's sacrifice."

Mildly comforted by the heavy hand on his shoulder, Oliver lifted his head. "I didn't say anything about love."

Diggle acknowledged his words. "Right now, I don't think you truly understand what love is, man."

He was right. Oliver didn't know anything about love. He'd seen what love had done to his parent's marriage. He'd seen how love had broken Laurel when he'd betrayed her and again when Tommy had died. He'd seen how love had turned other people – Helena and Slade – into a shadow of their former selves. He didn't understand how something so sacred had managed to hurt those closest to him over and over and over.

"My advice to you is to figure that out before you do something that could have far-reaching repercussions. You're a good man, Oliver and I know you'll do the right thing."

The right thing? He wished he knew what that was.


	15. Chapter 15

Felicity was walking on a cloud when she entered the foundry the following afternoon. From her position coming down the stairs she caught a glimpse of Roy and Diggle sitting across from one another but she couldn't quite determine what they were up to. Once she reached the bottom, it was pretty hard to miss.

"Man, I almost had you!" Diggle exclaimed excitedly, slamming one hand onto the table for emphasis.

Roy chortled. "Please. You weren't even close!"

"Best of five?" Diggle suggested.

Rolling his eyes, amusement evident in his voice, Roy replied, "We could do this all day and the result would still be the same. I win. You lose."

Felicity shook her head as she walked past them. Men! "Good morning, boys," she called, while dumping her coat and purse.

She heard a chorus of "Hey" coming from their direction before they locked eyes and raised their forearms again.

"I'll be with you in a sec, Felicity," Diggle said, "I just need to show this kid who's still got it."

Grinning Felicity stood and watched as Roy, with hardly any effort at all, slammed Diggle's hand to the table.

"You were saying, old man?" Roy teased.

Diggle scoffed, rubbing the back of his hand absently. "If we ever get that super soldier serum out of you, this would be a different ball game."

Roy shrugged, his eyes twinkling with mischief. "Since that's not the case right now, just admit it, I'm better than you."

Diggle laughed as he stood, punching Roy good-naturedly on the shoulder. "In arm wrestling? Never. You have an unfair advantage."

"Oh, come on!" Roy moaned. "What happened to best of five?"

"I'm taking a rain check. There's a lady present and it's bad manners to ignore her," Diggle laughed, walking over to sit beside Felicity.

Roy grinned, grabbing his red hoodie and walking toward the stairs. "Later!"

Felicity smiled at Diggle. "Looks like the two of you are becoming fast friends."

Rolling down the sleeves of his light blue shirt, his lips tilted up slightly at the corners. "He's a good kid. A little reckless and impulsive at times, but he's learning."

Felicity switched her tablet on. "That's thanks to all the work you guys have been putting in. It's paying off," she said, looking back in the direction Roy had disappeared in.

"So, you still haven't told me about your evening with the DA." Diggle's tone was teasing.

Thinking back on the moment at her apartment door, Felicity couldn't stop the colour that seeped into her cheeks.

"Oh," Diggle grinned. "It's like  _that_."

Smiling secretly, she replied, "It's not like anything. But I did have a good time." She turned slightly in her chair. "Dig, he's…incredible. Smart, attentive, a gentleman-"

"So he didn't take any unwanted liberties?" Diggle interrupted. Always her protector, he watched her closely.

Felicity shook her head, warmed by his concern.

Satisfied, he smiled slowly. "In that case, since when does a gentleman make a woman blush like that?"

Felicity nudged his shoulder with hers, unable to stop smiling. "Let's just say that he knows how to make a woman feel wanted."

Diggle hooted with laughter. "Good for you, Felicity."

She pushed her tablet back slightly. "I have a  _boyfriend_  who is issueless, Dig" she said, grinning foolishly. "I need to de-drama my life. This is the first step." She flopped back in her chair happily.

Raising an amused brow, he asked, "So it's official?"

She nodded. "Pretty much."

They sat in silence for a few moments, each with a grin on their face, listening to the pleasant hum of the equipment.

"Have you thought about what effect your  _actual_ job might have on your relationship?" he asked quietly.

Felicity exhaled loudly. She had thought about it and she knew it wouldn't be easy. "At the moment things are going so well, but I'm not naïve to think it won't get horribly complicated at some point. It's bound to. I break the law all the time and while my intentions are good, that's not how Adam would see it."

Diggle's face filled with surprise. "You've discussed it with him already?"

She shook her head vehemently. "No, not directly, of course. But once our conversation did briefly touch on the vigilante. He was pretty clear about his views."

Shrugging, Diggle rested his head against the back of his chair. "That's not entirely unexpected, you know. He's an attorney. They don't always see the grey areas."

Felicity looked over at Diggle, pushing her specs back up the bridge of her nose. "He's not like that," she said defensively.

He raised his hands to signal surrender. "Hey, I'm on your side here. Clearly I don't know him as well as you do."

She relaxed. "Sorry, I'm just a little anxious about it. And you are right in some respects. Even though Oliver saved his life once and I do believe he's grateful, he's not the kind of guy to let things slide. It's not who he is."

"Look, don't stress about it just yet. Enjoy getting to know him and cross that bridge when you get to it."

"I think so too. Thanks, Dig." She gave him an affectionate side-hug.

"Anytime."

* * *

Hesitating for a second, Oliver shook off his anxiety and raised his hand to knock on the door. He was about to knock again when the door swung open to reveal a sweaty Sara. She looked like she'd been working out.

"Hey," he said.

She dabbed her flushed cheeks with the ends of a white towel. "Hey."

They stared at one another, neither saying a word. Oliver was the first to speak. "Can I come in?"

Shrugging, she opened the door wider, shutting it with a soft thud after he'd crossed the threshold. They spoke simultaneously. "Ollie, why are you-"

"We need to-"

Sara gestured for him to continue. "I thought we should talk."

"Take a seat, please." She grabbed two bottles of water from the fridge and offered one to him before sitting down. They were in Laurel's apartment, a place Sara often stayed when she wasn't with Oliver.

"Look, about the last few weeks, I want to explain," he started.

"Wait. Let me go first, okay?" He nodded reluctantly. "I know that we never made any long term commitments to one another and I accept that what's between us isn't some grand love story-"

Oliver sat forward. "Sara-"

She shook her head. "No, Ollie, it's not. I love you and I'm sure you love me too, but we're not Buffy and Angel. It's not heartbreaking and angst ridden and epic. It's safe and easy and risk free. I want you to understand that I'm not pissed off because I saw you looking at another woman in a way that you've never looked at me, I'm pissed off because you haven't been honest about it."

He smiled faintly at her analogy. "You're right, I haven't been completely honest and I'm sorry. I didn't know what to say, so instead I just said nothing. It's not an excuse, but it's all I have."

She watched him closely as she took a sip from her water bottle. "What's going on between you and Felicity?"

"Nothing," came his automatic response.

"Ollie, please." She made to stand up.

"Don't go!" He grabbed her arm and guided her back into her seat. "There isn't anything going on. I mean it," he reiterated when she rolled her eyes. "She's dating Adam."

"Perhaps. But don't insult my intelligence by telling me that you have no feelings for her. I've seen the way you look at her."

He swallowed. This was hard. "Alright, I admit to caring about her – perhaps more than I should."

She frowned. "Then why haven't you ever asked her out? Or made a move?"

Oliver clenched his jaw. He didn't want to discuss this, but he knew he'd lose his chance to make things right with Sara if he didn't. "It's not that simple. The bottom line is, I'm not pursuing her. She's happy with someone else and no matter what I may feel, it wouldn't work out anyway." It was best that he remembered that.

"Ollie-"

"Everything I touch, I ruin, Sara," he burst forth, his words soft but fierce. "I don't even know if it's intentional, some form of self-sabotage so that those I care for never get to see how truly flawed I am. Maybe inside I'm thinking, _Hurt them before they have a chance to discover the real me._  My whole life I've been selfish. I see something I want and I take it, regardless of the consequences. Look at how all this started – I ruined your life the night I took you on-board the  _Queen's Gambit_  with me, but that's not where it ended. Laurel. Your parents. My family. So many others. They were all victims of my selfish desires." He bowed his head shamefully. "I don't want to hurt you. You're the only person in my life who knows  _everything_  about me, all the good and all the bad. You've never judged my choices or blamed me for everything you've been through – even though we both know that you should. Being with you these last couple of months has been wonderful and I don't regret any of it."

A single tear ran down her cheek. "But it's over."

He took her hands in his. He was relieved when she didn't pull away. "It has to be. You deserve more than some guy who's not really sure about where his head's at. I want you to know that this isn't about Felicity, it's about me. It's time to stop taking the easy way out. I don't know where this will lead to or how long it's going to take, but I can't ask you to wait around until I've got it all figured out. That's not fair to you. It's best that I take a break from all romantic entanglements." His laugh was harsh, without humour. "Apparently I'm really bad at it anyway."

Placing a comforting hand on top of his, Sara squeezed gently. "Maybe you'll suck less when you're in the right one." Her attempt at levity helped ease some of the tension.

"I'm sorry."

"Me too." She wiped the tear away with her discarded towel.

"Sara," he started, cautiously. "I don't want what's happened between us to ruin your relationships with the rest of the team. You're valued. You know that, right?"

She nodded, flicking a stray blonde curl that had come loose from her ponytail over her shoulder. "Yeah, I know. And it won't. You and I are both professionals." She stared at him, her lashes wet with unshed tears. "But that aside, we're friends, no matter what."

"No matter what," he echoed, reaching over to gather her into his arms.

As Oliver left Laurel's apartment he felt lighter, like a great weight had been lifted from his shoulders. Everything would be alright. Sara was an integral part of his past and he knew she'd be a part of his future – as an ally to his alter ego but more importantly, as his friend.

Diggle had been right. This had been as much about her as it had been about him and he couldn't describe how grateful he was that their friendship had not been ruined as a result of his offensive and thoughtless behavior. He was done hurting the people he cared about. He'd meant it when he'd told her that he needed some time alone, without any romantic diversions swaying him from his course. It was time to fix what the island had broken and he was the only one who could do it. The time for denial was over as was the time for procrastination and self-recrimination. He'd caused a lot of damage in the lives of the people he loved, but if he couldn't learn to forgive himself, then there was no chance that he could ever truly believe that they could forgive him.

Yes, he couldn't deny that he cared for Felicity and that her relationship with Adam felt like a gaping wound to his stomach, but right now, she didn't need him as much as he needed himself; whole, healthy and free of the demons that haunted him. No woman deserved only half of a man's soul because the other half was eaten away by guilt, pain and trauma. Not Sara. Not Felicity. No one.

So, he'd accept Felicity's new relationship and he'd support her, not because he  _had_  to, but because he wanted what was best for her – and who knew that better than Felicity herself. He was learning to let go. It was a small step, but one he was incredibly proud of.


	16. Chapter 16

Having just left Adam's office, Felicity found herself at Big Belly Burger to collect a latte before heading back to Queen Consolidated. Stepping inside, she placed her order before casually perusing the late afternoon crowd. Only a few tables were occupied and mostly by loners. She was about to focus her attention on her cellphone when a pair of all too familiar blues locked with hers. Automatically, her stomach rose into her throat.

_Oliver._

They hadn't talked much since the charity event mainly because Oliver had been out of town on QC business. She'd heard via Diggle that he and Sara had broken up. The news had surprised her since she'd always assumed that Sara was the kind of woman who was exactly his type. Apparently not. Surprising too, was Sara's behavior. She appeared to be completely okay with it. There were no mood swings, irrational anger and absolutely no signs of pining. In fact, she didn't seem upset at all.

Feeling ridiculous standing at the counter when he'd clearly seen her, she stopped fidgeting, took a deep breath and walked over to his table.

"Hi," she said, awkwardly. Dressed in a light grey suit, he wasn't wearing a tie. Not that he needed one. Oliver tended to exude a natural command and magnetism that didn't require the trappings of the corporate world.

"Hi," he replied, his pen dangling from his calloused fingertips.

She smiled uneasily. "I'm just grabbing a latte, not ditching work in the middle of the day. Or rather, late day? Because it's afternoon - closer to 4pm than 12pm so I know it's outside of my lunch break…which I should confess I sort of took later today because I had-"

"Felicity," Oliver interrupted, an exasperated laugh following closely behind his words.

She closed her eyes and cursed. "Sorry."

Silence descended. "Please," Oliver said softly, "join me."

She gulped, desperate for an excuse not to. "Oh, err no, that's okay. I don't want to disturb you." She gestured towards the papers lying before him.

Grabbing them and making a neat pile, he put them aside. "I'm all yours."

Their eyes met and her cheeks bloomed with colour. Obviously he didn't mean it  _that_ way. Because she didn't have much of a choice, she shrugged out of her favourite red coat and took a seat opposite him. Almost immediately her latte arrived.

"So, how was your trip to New York?"

"Excellent, actually. I'm glad I went. How are things with you? Dig mentioned that you're working on some new tech?"

Small talk. This was good. Feeling more comfortable, she elaborated. "Yeah. I've been trying to improve on one of my earlier gadgets. I don't want to say too much until I've perfected it, but I think you'll like it."

He grinned, glancing down at the black liquid in his cup. Felicity took the moment to look at him closely. There was something about him that seemed different. Less restless? She couldn't exactly pinpoint it. "I'm sure I will." He looked up so suddenly she flushed, sure he'd caught her staring. "Thank you, Felicity."

Confused, she frowned. "What for?"

"Your hard work. Telling you my secret was one of the best decisions I've ever made and that's saying something because I've made so many foolish ones." The last he said almost to himself.

His admission took her slightly aback. Perhaps because it wasn't in his nature to flatter unnecessarily and also because his words were uttered with an absolute ring of sincerity. Add the fact that he was looking at her in that rather intense way that always set her nerves on edge, then she was definitely wading in dangerous waters. She laughed self-consciously to cover her unease. "Anyone with a bit of savvy would have done."

A tad sharply, he countered. "No, I don't believe that. Your obvious skill and intelligence aren't your only attributes Felicity."

She could feel her face growing warm again. She hated that he had this effect on her. "Well, thanks. It's nice to hear."

"You're welcome." He ran a hand absently over the stubble splattered across his lower jaw. She'd always liked the look on him, far more than the clean shaven one he often sported on more formal occasions. Fascinated, she watched as his palm swept across his lips. She'd never noticed how his cupid's bow…

"You broke up with Sara?" she blurted. She'd rather field his shock at her daring than continue with that inappropriate train of thought. Shaking herself mentally, she sat up a little straighter. "Uh, Dig mentioned something."

"Is that the only way you and I communicate these days? Via Dig?" he asked, the corners of his mouth tipping up in amusement.

"Of course not," she replied instinctively, affronted before acknowledging that he was actually right. Over the last few weeks Diggle had been the proverbial middleman. She grinned. "Technically, we also text and email."

Oliver chuckled and she realized how much she'd missed hearing that sound. How much she'd missed  _him_. "Touché," he remarked, saluting her with his coffee cup before taking a sip.

Feeling pleased with herself, she relaxed into her chair.

"Yes. Sara and I are no longer together," he admitted quietly.

"Why?" She knew it was none of her business really, but she had to know. Had he met someone else? That had to be the reason. Oliver didn't just break up with someone unless there was someone else waiting in the wings. She knew she was being harsh and perhaps even unfair, but she couldn't help it. She resented the pangs of disappointed that stabbed in the region of her heart.

"It was the best decision for both of us. I-" he paused before finishing his sentence, "need some time alone."

So there wasn't someone else. She ignored the relief that coursed through her. "But you still work together," she reminded him.

He nodded. "And we'll continue to do so."

That meant that it hadn't ended badly. To be fair, Sara's behavior seemed to confirm that. Again, she was surprised. In all the time she'd known Oliver, every one of his relationships had resulted in loads of drama once it had run its course. This had to be a first. Interesting…

"I'm sorry," she said, meaning it.

He shrugged, then hesitated. "You and Adam?"

She looked at him sharply, her eyes searching his, expecting a hint of mockery. She was surprised when all she saw was curiosity. "We're good."

* * *

 

Oliver looked away. "I'm happy for you."

He wanted to mean it. He desperately did. But he'd be lying to himself if he pretended that the thought wasn't somewhat repugnant to him. Yes, he genuinely wanted Felicity to be happy and he accepted her relationship (sort of), but that didn't mean he was overjoyed about it. It only meant that he wasn't going to interfere.

He knew his attitude was confusing her. From the moment she'd seen him, she'd wanted to escape, to avoid having to converse with him. It was only her sense of politeness that had brought her over. It had amused him to see her trying to think of an excuse not to sit down and eventually capitulating when she realized she didn't have one.

She looked pretty. He'd noticed that too. Her hair was down and she wasn't wearing her glasses, a thing he'd observed the second he'd recognized her at the counter. Was it for Adam's benefit? The thought made him shift uncomfortably in his seat.

"Alright. What's going on?" She was glaring at him through narrowed, suspicious eyes.

He returned her stare, trying to force his mind back to the present. "What do you mean?"

"Oliver Queen, do not take me for a fool. Since when are you happy about my relationship with Adam? All you've done since you found out is behave like a high-handed jerk. Why the sudden change of heart?"

Her gaze was guarded, her previous reserve gone. If he hadn't known that she was dead serious, he might have laughed at her audacity. "Felicity, look, I know I behaved badly bef-"

"Badly?" Her voice raised an octave before she remembered where they were and leaned in closer to him to make sure he heard her every word. "You were insufferable and-"

He exhaled slowly, knowing he deserved her censure. "I agree."

"-completely and utterly out of line." One crimson fingernail stabbed the table repeatedly.

"I know."

"Not to mention disrespect-" She stopped mid-sentence. "Wait. What? You're agreeing with me?" She looked at him as though he'd sprouted a second head.

Swallowing his amusement, he nodded somberly. "You're right. I was all of those things and I apologise. I had no right to dictate the terms of your personal life. Who you choose to…associate with is completely your business." He ignored her gaping mouth. "I can't promise not to look out for you because I care about you, Felicity." His tone had warmed considerably. "But I promise to stop interfering."

If an alien had landed right next to her, he doubted that she would have noticed. She looked shell-shocked. Then suddenly, she blinked. "Oh."

He raised an eyebrow. He'd apologized and all he got was an _oh_? Perhaps he deserved that too. "I'm really sorry."

She visibly swallowed, running her hands down the front of her black and white checkered dress. "A-Apology accepted."

"Thank you." He meant it. He had behaved appallingly towards her and had she stormed out without so much as a backward glance, he wouldn't have blamed her. But he knew Felicity and she wasn't the kind to hold onto grudges. She wasn't built that way, a thing he was eternally grateful for. In the end, he realized he was getting off a lot easier than he deserved. He wouldn't take that knowledge for granted.

Then, without warning, chaos ensued.

Felicity's phone rang, permeating the already tense atmosphere between them. The unexpectedness of the jarring sound caused her to jump in her seat before hastily reaching for her purse. Her hand, oddly unsteady, knocked against her cup, sending the remainder of her latte flying through the air, landing in a sticky, wet mess across his paperwork. Instinctively grabbing the reports to shake the liquid off, he unfortunately ended up liberally sprinkling his designer shirt with light brown stains.

Felicity, yelping and muttering "I'm sorry" a million times in varying degrees of chagrin, grabbed a napkin and dabbed the front of his chest vigorously, essentially only succeeding in spreading the stains even further. Oliver, frozen at the rapid speed at which the situation had gone from bad to worse, attempted to grab her hands to stop the strangely disturbing pat down he was being subjected to. "Felicity," he said. Clearly oblivious to his discomfort, she spotted some discolored blots on the tops of his thighs. Zeroing in on them, she swiped her hands dangerously close to a sensitive part of his anatomy. Choking, he grabbed her wrists firmly in his. This had to stop.

"Felicity!" he grated, finally catching her attention.

He knew the second she realized what she'd been doing. Mortification flooded her face, her cheeks redder than a candied apple. Avoiding his gaze, she stumbled back, rubbing her wrists where he'd held her captive.

Instantly concerned, he moved closer, reaching for her. "Did I hurt you?"

Her eyes widened, recognizing his intention. "No! Um...no, no, I'm okay. I should go." She grabbed her coat and purse.

A waitress arrived and efficiently mopped up the spill, collecting all the crockery and neatly stacking it on a tray.

"Let me give you a ride to the office."

"No!" she exclaimed again, unable to look at him. "I have to go to the drug store."

He knew it was a lie. "Felicity-" But she was already hurrying across the diner and out of the door before he could finish his sentence. Annoyed, he grabbed his sodden paperwork and shoved it into an envelope before calling Diggle to pick him up.

If he hadn't been so wrapped up in his own muddled feelings, he might have realized that Felicity Smoak was not as indifferent to him as she pretended to be.


	17. Chapter 17

"I had no idea you were such an excellent cook," Felicity praised Adam, closing her eyes to savour the delicate flavours of the melt-in-your-mouth steak he'd prepared. Resting on a bed of creamy mashed potato and grilled asparagus, it was pure perfection.

They were sitting across from one another at a candlelit table in his large, airy, open plan kitchen cum dining area cum living space. The strategic lighting created by pretty downlight pendants that hung above his kitchen workspace as well as the fire that danced merrily beneath the stone feature wall opposite them, added just the right hint of romance to the otherwise domesticated scene. Adam, having removed his jacket and tie just before she'd arrived, looked comfortable and relaxed while he leisurely sipped his wine.

"Thank you. I'm glad you think so," he replied modestly, placing his glass back on the table.

She took another bite. "Seriously, where did you learn to do this?"

He shrugged, smiling, but it didn't quite reach his eyes. "It became a necessity when I eventually left home. I needed to eat so I learned to make myself useful in the kitchen."

Felicity cocked her head to the side, observing him. There was something he wasn't telling her. Not wanting to pry, she decided to drop it. When he'd asked her over for dinner she'd readily accepted because she was excited to spend more time with him but also, she was terribly curious about the way he lived. He seemed so together; sophisticated and well groomed. For starters, he didn't live in an apartment; he owned a home in one of the newer residential suburbs populated mostly by young couples and up and coming singles.

Secondly, he had immaculate taste. The walls were a luxurious creamy white that perfectly complimented the gleaming wooden floors. High vaulted ceilings assisted with channeling the abundance of natural light that spilled into the space through the large windows that completely dominated one side of the room. Although it was dark at the moment, Felicity had no doubts about how lovely it would be when the sun was out. All in all, she thought it was beautiful and a rather good reflection of Adam himself; solid, warm and inviting.

"Thank you, this has been really wonderful."

"Hey, the night's still young." Moving his plate aside, he reached for her hand, his fingers idly playing with hers. "You haven't even tried dessert."

The suggestive tone in his voice made her stomach do back flips. "I'm stuffed. Perhaps we could take a break between courses?" she suggested.

He laughed, standing and moving around the table to draw her up beside him. Of their own accord, her arms lifted to circle around his neck as his hands came to rest on her hips. Kissing her softly with enough enthusiasm to get her heart skipping beats, he slowed down and raised his head. "Let me clean up while you relax in front of the fire."

Felicity shook her head. "No. You cooked, so I clean."

He placed a finger under her chin and lifted until their eyes met. "I won't allow it. You're my guest. Put your feet up and make yourself at home. I won't be long, promise."

His blue eyes smiled down at her and she felt all her resistance crumble. "Alright. But only this one time," she warned.

"Deal." Satisfied, he dropped another kiss onto her eager lips before gently steering her in the direction of the comfortable looking sofa in front of the fire.

Taking her glass with her, Felicity sank into the soft seat and sighed with pleasure. It was nice to have someone take care of her for a change. In the background, she heard Adam moving back and forth between the kitchen and the table, carrying cutlery and crockery to and fro. Setting her glass aside, she noticed an open file on the seat beside her. Intending to close it and move it out of the way, her eyes caught and lingered on the words  _Starling City Orphanage_. Intrigued, she called out, "Adam, you left some paperwork here. What should I do with it?"

He approached from behind. "Sorry, I was doing some work just before you arrived." He smiled apologetically and neatly placed some of the loose sheets of paper inside the file.

"Starling City Orphanage?" she asked curiously. "Not usually the DA's line of work?"

He moved around the sofa and sat down beside her, placing the file on the table before him. "No, it's not. If fact that work has nothing to do with my office."

She frowned. "Then what does it have to do with you?" A shadow passed over his face. "Adam, are you okay?" She raised a hand and touched his cheek gently.

He reached for her hand and cradled it in the warmth of his palms. "Yeah, I'm fine. I, err, I do some pro bono work for the orphanage."

Interested, Felicity turned to face him. "Okay. What kind of work?"

He stared into the fire, his hands still holding hers. "I personally handle the legal side of all the adoptions and I assist Social Services with screening the applicants."

"Why?" She was stunned. It didn't seem like the kind of thing that someone at Adam's level would have the time to get involved in. She was aware of his case load and the amount of pressure he was always under.

He sat back and turned towards her until their knees touched. "My parents died when I was six. My Dad's only sister couldn't afford to take me in, so I entered the system."

Felicity's hand tightened around his, her heart in her throat.

"When I was eight, I was fostered by an older couple who couldn't have children. They put on quite a show for the social worker and the attorney handling the adoption. All they really wanted was cheap labour and a monthly check. Occasionally they got someone they could slap around too." He laughed bitterly.

"Adam," she said, her voice unsteady. She couldn't imagine what that must have been like.

He looked at her and shook his head. "Don't cry, Felicity. I made it out okay. When I graduated from High School I hit the road and never looked back. I worked three jobs to put myself through law school and I promised myself that when I made it, I would do whatever I could to prevent the same thing from happening to other kids." He reached for the file on the table and flipped it open. "Whenever a couple wants to adopt, Social Services contacts me. As DA I have the resources to do more than just the basic checks, so I make the time to help."

Looking into the file she saw a photo of a little girl, probably around five or six, with blonde pigtails and piercing blue eyes that smiled into the camera. "Was she adopted?"

"Yes. The papers were filed nine months ago."

"She looks happy."

Adam smiled. "She is." He pulled out a small square note with crooked writing on it and handed it over to her.

 

_Deer Mr Adam_

_Thank you for my new home. I love my mommy and daddy and they love me to._

_From Rebekah Moore_

_PS The gum drops is for you but my mommy says its bad to eat all at once becors your teeth will rot. Pleese be carful._

 

Felicity smiled. The letter was adorable. There was so much more to Adam Donner than what met the eye. Who would have thought that a man judged from the outside to be cold and calculated made it a priority to place abandoned children in a loving and secure home? "What you do, it's incredible."

"I'm not a hero, Felicity. I don't always get it right. I'm not the one the Starling City community cheers for whenever a criminal is apprehended, despite the fact that I've made it my life's work." His voice contained no envy or malice, just fact.

She reached over and cupped his cheeks in her hands. His stubble was starting to show and it scratched against her palms but she hardly noticed. "Not all heroes walk around in capes and masks. Some of them hide in plain sight. You  _are_  a hero, Adam. To that little girl and to the countless others just like her…and to me too."

He gathered her into his arms and kissed her long and hard. Breathless, he lifted his head. "When you say it like that, I can almost believe it."

She smiled and lowered her lips to his until they were mere inches apart. "Perhaps I need to try a little harder to convince you."

Laughing softly, his hands tangled in the soft mass of her hair. "By all means," he whispered seconds before her lips touched his.

Later, after Adam had dropped her at home, Felicity lay in bed wide awake. The evening's revelations had been surprising but she was glad he'd shared it with her. It made her feel closer to him and affirmed that her instincts about him had been true. He was a good man, doing good work, but seeking none of the glory.

Then there was Oliver. After their encounter the day before, she'd come to some realizations about herself. The first was that she wasn't completely immune to him, but that was okay. She wouldn't beat herself up about it. She was confident that she'd wake up one morning sometime soon and be completely over it. The reality was that if feelings went unnurtured long enough, there was nowhere for that affection to go but to disappear. At least that was what she told herself.

The second was that despite the fact that it was still early days in her relationship with Adam, the more time she spent with him, the more she cared about him and she was sure that given enough time, she may have to face a very difficult decision.

* * *

At the foundry, Oliver was hitting his workout routine hard. It was late and everyone had already left for the day. Upstairs the music was pumping as party goers danced the night away at Verdant. He however, was not having a good time. He was annoyed and irritated and on edge. Felicity had been all politeness, as though the encounter at Big Belly had never happened. He knew he was being irrational,  _nothing_ had happened, but he somehow hadn't expected her to be so…normal. Things had been like old times. She'd laughed and joked with him, even made him coffee when she'd gone to get one for herself. Then she'd left early because she was meeting Adam for dinner. At his place.

Perhaps that thought, more than any other, was really what had him wanting to throw a few punches. He shouldn't care what she was doing, or with whom, but he did and the idea that Donner was on the receiving end of her affection was a little more than his mood could handle at present.

Giving his punching bag one last stress relieving punch, he moved toward the back table to collect his bottle of water.

"You seem pissed off," came Roy's voice as he descended the stairs.

"Shouldn't you be carrying around cases of beer, or something?" Oliver deflected.

He snorted. "Trust me, there is more than enough to go around. Besides, Thea in bossy mode is a thing I try to avoid." He came to stand beside Oliver, leaning back against the table Oliver was facing. "So what's caused the bee in your bonnet?"

Oliver shrugged. "Can't a guy just work out around here without attracting attention?"

Roy raised an eyebrow. "Usually, yes. But since you were trying to knock that bag off its hinges, I'd say this is no ordinary training session."

He frowned. "Since when did you become all touchy feely?"

Grinning, Roy crossed his arms over his chest. "Since I met your sister."

Acknowledging his statement with the shake of his head, Oliver turned around and leaned back beside Roy. "How are things going with Thea?"

Roy paused, suspicious. "Good. Is this going to be another one of your speeches where you tell me that it's in your sister's best interests if I leave her alone?" His voice rose slightly. "Because I'll tell you what I told you the last time-"

Oliver held up a hand. "Whoa. Roy, no. It was merely a question." He clenched his jaw. "What is it with the people around here snapping at me lately?"

"You mean you don't behave like an ass that probably deserves it ninety percent of the time?"

Glaring at the younger man, Oliver conceded. "Okay, I guess I deserved that."

Roy's eyes widened. "You're admitting that you're an ass?"

"Hey, I wouldn't go quite thatfar, but I admit," he took a swig from his bottle, "that I haven't exactly been a ray of sunshine."

Bemused, Roy shook his head. "Is this the part where you shoot me with an arrow in order to prevent me from telling anyone else what you just said?"

Exasperated, Oliver rolled his eyes.

"I'm kidding, okay? You know, while we're on the subject of your many flaws, you should probably learn to lighten up a bit too. You're way too intense."

"Why thank you, Roy. I'll take that under advisement," he replied sardonically.

Ignoring the glaring sarcasm, Roy grinned. "So, you gonna tell me what all this is about, or what?" He gestured between the punching bag and Oliver's bound knuckles.

"Do you ever mind your own business?"

"No."

Oliver grasped the end of a piece of fabric and started unwinding it from around his hand. "I just needed to blow off some steam." He couldn't believe he was actually answering the question.

"This have anything to do with Felicity?" Oliver glanced at him sharply and Roy shrugged. "You may think we're all blind idiots, but we're really not."

He went back to unwrapping his hands. "You don't know what you're talking about."

Roy stared at him. "I see that you want to be a better man, but you don't quite know how. I see the way you look at Felicity but you keep your distance because you don't believe you're good enough for her. And I see how you're trying to be the bigger person by letting her run her own life without interfering. How's that working for you?"

Oliver remained still. What the hell? Since when had he become an open book? "Am I supposed to answer that?" He kept his tone neutral.

For a moment Roy didn't say anything, he just watched Oliver. Then he asked, "Do you wanna know why I haven't dumped Thea like you've asked?"

"I didn't ask you to  _dump_  her," Oliver exclaimed, offended.

Roy rolled his eyes. "You did. But that's not the point."

Sighing heavily, Oliver asked curiously, "Why?"

"Because even though I know that she could do a whole lot better than me,  _she_ doesn't believe that. Even after all I've done to push her away, she just keeps coming back. Then I realized why. It's because she believes in me. She knows I can be better, do better. But she also knows that I'm not perfect, but that I try, everyday, not to let her down." Roy looked down at his sneakers, suddenly a little reticent. "I don't try to be a better man for  _her_ , Oliver, I try for  _me_. Because the day  _I_  stop caring about how  _I_  treat her, is the same day I no longer deserve her. So you see, every day when I open my eyes, the fight to be worthy of her is what keeps me going."

Deeply affected, but unable to meet the younger man's eyes, Oliver asked, "How does this pertain to me?"

"Maybe you need to decide what it is about you that you need to change in order to be worthy of someone like Felicity."

With those heavy words hanging between them, Roy patted his shoulder and walked back up the stairs leaving a thoughtful Oliver staring after him.


	18. Chapter 18

Felicity spent the majority of her weekend with Adam. It was a novelty being with someone other than Diggle, Oliver or Roy in a setting that didn't feel like an underground bunker most of the time. She wasn't complaining though, she loved her work and took pride in the contribution she made to the team. However, it felt good to have an interest that wasn't solely based around Oliver Queen and his constantly evolving needs.

On Saturday night she'd returned the favour and cooked for Adam. This time, however, it had been a dual effort and she couldn't remember the last time she'd had so much fun or laughed so loud. Who knew that her tiny kitchen was capable of creating such an intimate and cozy atmosphere? Their meal had been delicious, made more so because they'd both enjoyed the process from start to finish.

The following morning Adam picked her up and whisked her away to a quaint bistro for an unexpected, yet delightful brunch. Afterwards, strolling amid the various market stalls selling everything from fresh produce to little trinkets, Felicity caught sight of what her life might be like with Adam as a permanent fixture in it. There'd be laughter and lazy days spent indoors watching movies and cuddling on the couch. There'd also be times when they'd venture out to explore, trying new things and making new memories. It wouldn't grow dull or boring, she knew that instinctively. He was the kind of guy who kept a woman on her toes, definitely one of the things she liked most about him. He'd also make sure that she felt safe and loved and cared for because that was the kind of man he was; he put her needs first.

Just the other day they'd grabbed lunch together when he'd bumped into an important colleague. Instead of making her wait while they chatted business, he'd introduced her and tactfully informed his associate that they'd catch up when he was back in the office. Steering her away and following close behind, he forgot the other guy within seconds. She smiled thinking about the memory. A future with him wouldn't be a hardship.

"A penny for your thoughts?" Adam asked as she slipped her arm through his.

Looking up at him, so handsome in jeans and a jacket, she replied, "You'll be pleased to know that I was actually thinking about you."

His eyebrow rose, amused. "Contemplating my charm and good looks, were you?" he teased.

She studied him with false seriousness. "You're good looking?"

He burst out laughing, clutching his heart theatrically. "The Lady wounds me."

"So dramatic," she jested, rolling her eyes. "Actually, I was remembering how you sent your colleague packing when we had lunch the other day."

"Was that unusual?"

"In a word? Yes."

He directed her left to avoid colliding with a woman pushing a stroller. "Why?"

"Most people tend to be so far up their superior's behinds that you can see them emerging from their mouths."

He chuckled at the analogy. "If I hadn't been with you, I would probably have invited him to sit with me. But since I wasn't alone, it wouldn't have been appropriate to spend the time I was dedicating to you, listening to him. Besides, I was going to run into him at the office anyway, so it could wait." He looked down at her. "You're far too important for me to ignore."

Her heart swelled and she looked away, a little embarrassed by the warmth in his gaze. "Hey, look." She pointed to an elderly gentleman caressing the spine of a well worn tome. "There's a guy selling vintage books. Maybe you'll get lucky and find Mrs. Maybrick."

Adam loved conspiracy theories which was ironic considering that he only ever applied logic and reason when it came to his profession. He called the contradiction in his nature escapism; Felicity found it fascinating. His current interest revolved around the Jack the Ripper murders. Having read up on all the supposed suspects, he'd finished off with James Maybrick. Convinced that he wasn't the actual killer, but intrigued enough to want to know more, he was in search of a rare copy of Maybrick's widow's autobiography.

"Today's the day," he vowed. "I have my lucky charm." He flashed her a smile as he grabbed her hand and made a beeline for the vendor.

Felicity was having so much fun that she was startled when her phone rang midway through laughing at Adam as he bargained with the seasoned dealer.

Moving away slightly when she saw it was Diggle, she answered, "Dig?"

"Hey, Felicity. Listen, sorry to ruin your Sunday but we have an emergency at Verdant."

Alarmed, she glanced at Adam who thankfully had his back to her. "What's going on?"

He sounded apologetic. "I was trying to show Roy how your tracking software works and he inadvertently pressed something that caused the whole system to shut down. Oliver's not here right now, but should anything happen, we have no way of keeping tabs on him."

Felicity sighed. She could attempt to explain the recovery procedure over the phone, but that would probably take longer than just going in and doing it herself.  _Dammit._  "Alright. I'll be there in just under an hour."

"Why so long? You not home?" he asked curiously.

"No, I'm with Adam," she explained. "So it will take me a little longer to get back into town."

"Sorry about this," he apologised for a second time.

Felicity swallowed her disappointment. This was bound to happen at some point. "Its okay, Dig, don't worry about it. I'll see you in a bit." She signed off in time to see Adam sauntering towards her, the book he was after clutched triumphantly in his hand. At the look on her face, his expression changed instantly to one of concern.

"Everything alright?" he asked, touching her cheek gently.

She smiled. "Yeah, I just have some bad news." At his questioning look, she explained, "That was…err…one of the guys from the IT Department. There's been a…server crash and they need my help to fix it." She hated lying to him and felt even worse when she saw the genuine understanding in his eyes.

He tried to hide his disappointment but didn't quite manage it. "Of course they need you. You're the best they have."

She felt horrible. "I'm sorry."

"Don't apologise. I hate that you have to go, but I do understand." He gathered her into the circle of his arms and bumped his nose against hers. "Come on, I'll drop you off."

She leaned up and gave him a kiss filled with promise. He truly was amazing. It would mean texting Diggle and asking him to fetch her at Queen Consolidated instead of heading straight to Verdant, but she didn't know how to explain wanting to leave alone, so she didn't bother.

* * *

 

Oliver arrived at Verdant just as Diggle and Felicity climbed out of the Lexus. Felicity, Oliver noted, looked different. "Hey," he said by way of greeting. He nodded at Diggle who walked a little ahead of them. "You look nice," he told her softly, realizing that this was the first time he'd ever seen her in jeans. Or perhaps it was the first time he'd ever really noticed.

She looked at him curiously before focusing ahead. "Thanks."

Diggle turned back. "You should probably know that Roy kinda locked us out of the system. Felicity is here to fix it."

Oliver frowned at the other man. So Felicity hadn't  _intended_  to come in. That meant one thing: she'd been with Donner. His stomach tied itself in knots but he didn't say anything. He was newly resolved to make better choices and he was damned if he'd allow his envy to derail him. Felicity deserved to have some fun and who she spent her time with when she wasn't at QC or in the bowels of Verdant was none of his business.

Nodding in an attempt to reaffirm his will, he followed them toward the computer terminals. Diggle's mobile rang so he moved aside to take the call. Oliver cleared his throat. "I'm sorry if your afternoon was ruined on account of this."

She smiled briefly, but he could tell that disappointment lingered. "It's a part of the job and I accept that."

"You were out?" he inquired casually.

"Yes."

When he just looked at her she reluctantly explained, "With Adam. We had plans and midway through Dig called. He, err, dropped me off at QC."

He put the pieces together. "So Dig picked you up."

She nodded, smiling faintly. "Couldn't exactly ask Adam to drop me off a night club on a Sunday afternoon."

"I see how that could be a bit awkward."

She dropped her purse on the table and handed him a bottle of antiseptic. "I assume this is yours?"

"Yeah. A few minor cuts." He reached out and their hands briefly made contact. He swallowed. It was an innocent, insignificant detail that had occurred a million times before, but now it felt different. Now he was aware of the warmth of her skin against his, the softness of her touch, the-  _Stop!_

She smiled at him, completely oblivious to his inner struggles. "Don't pack it too far away. You'll probably need it again soon."

He watched as she removed her coat to reveal a feminine pink blouse underneath. "So what's the plan now?"

She sat down. "Sort this out and then run updates. Since I'm here I may as well get some additional work done."

He shouldn't have, but he felt happy knowing she'd be around for the rest of the day. He missed her company. Since she'd started dating the DA, it severely cut into the time they spent together. Something, he was ashamed to admit, he'd taken for granted for a long time. "I have some-"

"Crap! My tablet's still in the car." She swiveled toward him and stood abruptly, the suddenness of her movement throwing him off balance. Unexpectedly, they collided. "Oh!"

His reflexes kicked in, catching her around the waist to steady her before she toppled over. Reflexively her hands grasped his shoulders as though her life depended on it. Back on her feet, she blinked up at him.

"Are you okay?" he asked softly. Behind the lenses of her spectacles, her eyes were like two bright blue orbs, her gaze unwavering.

"Fine," she replied. They stood like that for a few seconds, their eyes locked, neither saying a word. Oliver felt his heart begin to hammer, his eyes taking in every detail as though he hadn't seen her in months. Her hair, pulled back into its usual ponytail looked so soft and shiny he was tempted to run his fingers through it. Her cheeks, stained with a light blush seemed to add to her general glow of good health and vitality. Her lips, lush and full, colored a bright pink, had never been more distracting. Stuck in some kind of infatuated stupor, he was thankful when Felicity seemed to realize their awkward position, turning away before he did something stupid.

Roy, who'd apparently been loitering in the back, stepped forward looking nervous. "Felicity, I didn't mean to mess things up," he said contritely.

Oliver cursed beneath his breath. His palms were sweaty. He couldn't remember the last time that had happened - probably not since he was in kindergarten. Roy's timing was impeccable as ever.

Felicity smiled at the younger man indulgently, clearly unaffected by their closeness a moment before. If she could be impervious, then dammit, so could he.  _Yeah right._  "It's okay, really. You didn't do anything that can't be fixed with the flick of these babies." As if to demonstrate, her fingers flew across the keyboard and within seconds they were back online. "Voila." She grinned, clearly chuffed with herself.

Oliver thought she looked adorable. Scowling, he spoke in a sharper tone than he intended. "Be careful next time."

Diggle rejoined them in time to see Roy turn red. "I said I was sorry."

The accusing stares he received from Diggle and Felicity made him feel like a fool. Much gentler, he added, "Maybe Felicity should be the one tutoring you. Dig clearly doesn't know what he's doing."

Diggle's snort easily diffused the tension. "Come on man, I panicked, okay? Cut me some slack."

"Panic is an understatement. You went green," Roy taunted.

"Who was green?" asked Sara as she descended the stairs.

Oliver smiled in her direction and she returned the gesture. They were okay. "Dig, apparently. He nearly broke Felicity's power house."

"Seriously? That's how you wanna play this?"

Felicity giggled and glanced at Sara and Oliver. She seemed to be looking for something but he wasn't sure what. "In case you're wondering, he didn't come close," she explained.

Roy was hooting with laughter. "This just gets better."

Diggle went over and playfully punched him in the arm. "You owe me one, man."

Oliver turned toward Sara as the background chatter faded. His attention, however, was never entirely off the woman sitting in front of the computers pressing a complicated combination of keys. "Are you okay?"

Sara shoved her hands into the pockets of her leather jacket. "I'm good, thanks. My Dad's relieved that you're no longer my boyfriend," she teased, easing back to lean against one of the chairs.

Oliver let out a low laugh. "Now that I can believe. Laurel?"

"Initially she was indignant on my behalf, as I'm sure you can imagine." She rolled her eyes. "But I explained without going into the specifics and I think she gets it."

He nodded looking around. "We must all have no lives for this to be the highlight of our weekend."

Felicity turned in their direction. "Speak for yourself. I was mid highlight when Dig called."

Her words caused his stomach to drop to the floor. The image of Felicity and Donner clasped in a passionate embrace was raising his blood pressure. Because Sara was looking at him, he kept his expression neutral.

"Yeah, it's his fault," Roy said with mock solemnity. "So inconsiderate."

Diggle shook his head. "Kid, I'm getting you back for this."

"You two are like three year olds," Sara added, humor lacing her words.

Oliver's attention was caught when he saw Felicity reach for her phone. Turning her chair away from their chatter, she answered. After a few whispered words she ended the call, pressed a few additional keys on her keyboard, then stood. "I'm running updates but you can use the terminal, just don't shut anything down." The latter she said with a smile while looking at Diggle and Roy. Turning to Oliver she asked, "You need me for anything else?" The fact that she was standing packed and ready to go clearly indicated that she hoped he didn't. 

Disappointed that she was leaving, especially since he had an idea of who she was going to see, he shook his head. "There's nothing. Go have fun." The way she beamed at him twisted his gut. He could have made up something plausible to keep her there and probably would have a few weeks ago. Jealousy still burned within him, but he knew better now. Despite how much he wanted her to stay, ultimately the choice needed to be hers. Clearly it wasn't.

With a heart that felt heavier than before, he headed toward the training mats and called Roy and Sara over to join him.


	19. Chapter 19

Over the course of the next few weeks' Oliver's life followed a more orderly routine. Gone were the complications brought on by meaningless relationships and in its stead was the time to focus on getting up to speed with what was happening at Queen Consolidated by day, and cleaning the streets of Starling City by night. The change of focus was good for him and the sense of accomplishment he derived from being as productive as possible was true motivation to keep going on all fronts.

He and Felicity had settled into a comfortable camaraderie again. If anything, he was more attracted to her than ever and often found himself wondering what might have happened if he hadn't been such a blind fool. Then he reminded himself that he hadn't been in the right space to be the kind of man that she deserved, he still wasn't. But at least he was able to acknowledge where he'd gone wrong and attempt to take the necessary steps to repair the damage. He would never have forgiven himself if he'd taken advantage of her feelings for him only to break her heart down the line. There would have been no coming back from that. He'd have lost her completely and deservedly so. The reality was that that's the kind of guy he used to be and he honestly no longer cared for that version of himself.

If Felicity still harbored any residual feelings for him, then she hid it well, because he certainly detected nothing. He still found it difficult to see her so happy with another man, but he was grateful for the hard lessons he'd come to learn as a result of it. Taking her for granted had cost him more than he'd initially realized. It had driven her away, into the arms of a more deserving man, and it had fundamentally changed something between them. He didn't doubt her loyalty, not for a second, but he also realized that he was no longer her first and only priority. She was as dedicated to her work at QC and to the Arrow as ever before, but she now had a life of her own that was completely separate from him and the team. In his weaker moments, he admitted that it stung and that he had only himself to blame.

Sitting at his desk at QC, Oliver was perusing the latest stock reports when Felicity breezed in. "I have some good news," she said, her eyes alight with excitement.

He sat back and smiled faintly, convinced it was something to do with some or other program or gadget she was working on. "I'm all ears."

She walked deeper into the room, the heels of her black stilettos tapping on the floor. "You know how I couldn't figure out where Dream Dynamics were siphoning funds to?" She didn't wait for his response before continuing, "Well, this new program I've developed is able to track and trace all-" At his arched eyebrows, she comically rolled her eyes and waved her hands in front of her face dismissively. "English. Right. Basically, I've found it. It all ties back to Harvey Davis and the shell corporations he's set up in the Glades that's conning people out of their life savings. We got him."

Oliver stood and walked around the table towards her, buttoning his suit jacket out of habit. "No,  _you_  got him."

She preened a little, pleased at his praise. "Well, you know, I kinda did."

"So, guess where I'll be tonight?"

She snapped her fingers. "Hauling ass on behalf of the SCPD?"

He laughed at her choice of words. "Something like that." He touched her arm lightly and then thought better of prolonging the contact. Shoving his hands into his pockets, he looked at her admiringly. "Good work, Felicity."

Twisting her hands together self-consciously, shrugged. "Thanks, but the job's not completely done yet. Once he's safely in police custody and all the information I've found out about him handed over, then we can all breathe a sigh of relief. One more baddie out of the Glades."

He wondered if she was seeing Donner. "You don't have to stay tonight if you have other plans."

"Oh no, I want to be there. I mean, we started this together. It's fitting that we end it together too." Their eyes met and Oliver's heart thumped a little faster. "Besides, who's going to make sure you get back safely?" she teased.

"Diggle?" he asked, in jest.

"Sure," she said making as though she was seriously considering it. "You could do that. But it would mean leaving him behind when you might need backup. You do know that Roy's not quite ready for nighttime adventures that require a measure of discretion? Now if you're looking for absolute destruction, then he's your guy."

'Well-"

She put a hand up. "And before you mention Sara, you know she's out of town visiting her mom." Biting her lip, Felicity appeared to be contemplating something. "Oliver, I appreciate you acknowledging that I have a life outside of work, but being involved in our covert operations is still as important to me as ever."

Hearing her say it meant everything to him. "What would I do without you?" Realising how possessive that sounded, he amended, "I meant, what would  _we_ do without you?"

Grinning, she folded her arms across her purple sweater. "Believe it or not, that's a question I ask myself all the time."

So did he actually. He dreaded the day when she might ask him to walk away because living a double life had eventually taken its toll. He knew that better than anyone. Felicity wasn't built for lies and deception, especially not with people she genuinely cared about. Would the day come when Adam meant more to her than the team?

"Then I look forward to having you in my ear." His lips twitched.

Her cheeks went red as she remembered the occasion she'd said those words to him. She touched her forehead, cringing. "I thought we agreed never to talk about that again?"

Oliver frowned, feigning confusion. "I don't recall actually agreeing to anything."

She glared at him. "That's why it was called  _tacit_."

"Sorry, I don't know what you're talking about," he deadpanned.

He noticed that she was trying hard not to laugh. "Fine. I'll remember this," she warned, turning and marching in the direction of her workstation. "And so should you."

"Is that a challenge?" he called after her.

The interpreted the smirk she sent his way as an affirmative. Sitting back down and feeling lighter than he had in a while, Oliver glanced up and noticed the smile on Felicity's face. It felt good to know that for the first time in a long time, he was solely responsible for it.

* * *

 

The following evening Felicity had finished sharing a pizza with Adam in front of the fire when he ended a call with an associate.

"Everything okay?"

He sighed and made himself more comfortable on the couch. They were laying together, her head on his chest, her hand splayed across his heart. For the past few minutes she'd been mewling like a kitten as he gently massaged her scalp. She lifted her head to see him running a weary hand over his face, sympathy rushing to the fore. He'd been working really long days over the past week. "My work load has just tripled." At her inquiring look, he explained, "I'm on the Davis case. This means another few months of hard slogging so I'll be ready for the trial."

Her pulse hopped. The previous night Oliver had delivered a bound Davis into the hands of Quentin Lance, along with all of Felicity's intel. The fraudster was looking at a long time behind bars. She placed her head back on his chest. "Surely the case is cut and dried?"

She felt him shaking his head. "Not necessarily. I'll need to go over all the details with a fine tooth comb. All it takes is one small misstep and he'll walk."

Felicity was pretty sure that she'd been thorough, but she couldn't tell him that. "He's been on your radar for a long time?"

Adam resumed running a hand absently through her hair. "Yes, I sort of inherited him from the previous DA. I guess the vigilante strikes it lucky again." His words didn't sound complimentary.

Knowing that she was treading on dangerous territory, Felicity decided to proceed with caution. "You really don't like him, do you?" Wanting to see him she propped her chin on her hand and regarded him thoughtfully.

"It's not that I don't like him; it's not personal, Felicity. I just can't support someone who represents everything I work against."

"But he  _has_  done good things for this City," she argued. "Things that the Police haven't been able to. He's helped improve the lives of so many people."

He placed his arm behind his head so he could see her better. "Yes he has. I can't deny that he's made a big difference both here and in the Glades, but at what cost, Felicity?"

A little frustrated that he wasn't seeing her point, she sat up. "Come on, Adam. Replacing a street lamp here and there or having to rebuild a wall can hardly be weighed against that of saving a life?"

Following her up, he continued, his tone not at all argumentative. "I'm not referring to the monetary implications, I'm talking about the human side of this. These days he seems less inclined to kill, but that wasn't always the case. Why the change? Will he ever regress? I don't know. My point is, what if some other people get it into their heads that vigilante justice is acceptable? What if they start picking off their neighbours over a perceived wrong? What's good for one man should be good for all, right? Wrong. With everyone running around doing their own thing there'd be chaos. That's why we have a legal system that aims at protecting the innocent and punishing the guilty. If that system falls apart because we allow one or two or three men to live above the rules that applies to everyone else, can you begin to imagine the fallout?"

Taking her cue from him, Felicity calmed down. She wasn't supposed to come across as emotionally invested. "Whatever his reasons, he seems to have turned a new leaf and I-I don't know why, but I don't think he'd go back to killing people indiscriminately. You have to admit, he knows what he's doing and it's a benefit to us all. Honestly, would you have been able to prosecute Perez and probably Davis and countless others without him?"

Adam leaned forward and stoked the fire before placing the poker back in its stand. Once more the room was bathed in a warm orange and yellow glow. "Maybe not. I can't answer that. All I know is that I've worked tirelessly to get those men and so many others caught the  _right_  way. Do you know how many times I've seen guys like them walk because of a technicality? Because the arresting officer wasn't following protocol or the chain of evidence was contaminated? Those were professional people who should have known better. What happens when it's a man who answers to no higher power, who's exempt from the consequences that you and I would face in a similar situation? It may take me twice as long to catch them, Felicity, but at least I'd know that when I walk into that courtroom, there are no surprises waiting for me." He spoke passionately, his voice ringing with conviction. "So I guess I do have an answer to your question: Yes, he's made my life easier by dropping these guys on my doorstep but he's also made it ten times harder to prosecute them because the guy who caught them can never be called to testify. And even if he did, would anyone actually believe a murderer masquerading behind a veil of anonymity?"

Felicity sat in stunned silence.  _Murderer._  The word reverberated through her brain like a bullet ricocheting off a wall. She believed in Oliver and his cause. In the depths of her soul, she'd never doubted that his intentions, though not always executed in the best ways, were good. She knew his reasons for being the vigilante and she understood his desire to improve the lives of the people in the City they both loved. Wasn't calling him a murderer a bit harsh? "I never thought of it like that," she admitted.

He reached for her hand and kissed her palm softly. "Whoever he is, he saved my life once and I'm grateful, so I guess I owe him one. I like to think that I'm repaying that debt by not chasing after him."

She smiled weakly. "Why aren't you?"

"I don't take what he did for me lightly. He could have left me to die and no one would have been the wiser. But he didn't. Despite how I may feel about the way he goes about doing things, I won't ever forget that. So as long as he stays out of my way, he has nothing to fear from me."

"You're a good man, Adam Donner," she said, moving towards him and cuddling against his side.

When his arms wrapped around her, she closed her eyes feeling more conflicted than she ever had before. For the first time, she also understood why Adam loved the law and why he believed that if he stayed on the right side of it, he could be as effective as any vigilante. Perhaps he wouldn't be as swift, but at least he'd close his eyes at night knowing that his conscience was clear – a thing she knew Oliver still had trouble mastering despite his absolute conviction in his cause. The feeling she'd had a while ago that a big decision was imminent rose up within her again causing a moment of panic. Would she ever have to choose between Adam and Team Arrow? And if she did, what would her choice be? Either way, she couldn't shake the belief that should it ever come to that, no matter what she chose, her heart would break regardless.


	20. Chapter 20

"Remember the conference I need to attend in Chicago?" Adam asked Felicity over lunch a few days later. They were at Big Belly Burger grabbing something to eat before he had to run back to court.

Nibbling on a fry, she replied, "Yeah. You're leaving in three days?"

Sighing, he wiped the corners of his mouth with a napkin. "Tonight. I'm on the last flight out."

Felicity frowned. "How come?"

"One of the key speakers wants to meet with me ahead of time to discuss the paper he's presenting."

Shaking her head she wrapped her hands around her tea cup. "I can't believe they only told you this now."

"Government departments aren't always known for their forward thinking," he replied, amused.

She grinned. "Have you ever considered working in the private sector?"

Taking a sip of coffee as he contemplated her question. "I did, actually. I received several offers after I graduated and even accepted one. After a year I decided it wasn't for me. As much as I wish we had better resources and more money at our disposal in public services, I feel it's the place I can do the most good."

She respected him for his choice. Many men and women chased money, fame and glory but Adam wasn't one of them. "So, for how long will you be gone?"

Looking at her apologetically, he replied, "A week. It'll be all work and no fun so at least you know I won't be having a raucous time without you."

She narrowed her eyes and stared at him with false suspicion. "Perhaps I should plant some spyware on you just to make sure."

He laughed. "Feel free. Although I warn you, you'll die of boredom."

"I'll miss you." She reached for his hand and linked their fingers together.

Dropping a kiss on the back of her wrist he smiled, his blue eyes alight with mischief. "If you want to, you could come with me?" he cajoled.

She wished she could, but it wouldn't be possible. There was too much work to be done for her to skip out of town for a few days. Disappointed, she shook her head. "Tempting, it really is, but I can't. My workload at the moment wouldn't allow it."

"You can't blame a guy for trying," he said with a wink. Catching the waitress's eye he requested the bill.

"I'm flattered that you did."

Standing, he grabbed the jacket of his tan suit and shoved his arms into the sleeves. Felicity moved forward and straightened his striped tie. "I probably won't see you again before you leave."

Reluctantly he agreed. "There won't be time, I'm afraid. Not if I hope to finish the mountain of work waiting for me once I get back from court."

Hand in hand they stepped out into the gloomy weather. "Darn! I left my umbrella at the office. Looks like rain," she remarked as she watched the storm clouds gathering. Unconcerned, she smiled. "But no matter. Lucky for me, I have a boyfriend who can drop me off at the office."

With a chuckle he hugged her to his side as they walked to his car parked at the curb. "Now I know why you keep me around. You're actually just looking for a chauffeur."

"You only discovered this now?" she teased. "What kind of an attorney are you?"

Stopping in front of the passenger door he kissed her firmly on the lips. "The kind who knows a good deal when he sees one."

* * *

Back at Queen Consolidated, Oliver stared at his computer screen in frustration. For the last hour he'd been trying to finalise his presentation to the board. A lot rode on how smoothly it went and how well it was received. He'd planned on having it ready the day before, but with his Arrow duties taking temporary priority, he hadn't managed to make the deadline. Glancing at the clock for the umpteenth time, he cursed.

"I hope that's not directed at me," Diggle commented as he strode in.

Without removing his eyes from the screen, Oliver replied, "Definitely not. But if I don't get this sorted out in the next thirty minutes, I'll be handing this company over to Isobel on a gold platter."

Diggle let out a low whistle. "What's the problem?"

Irate, he shoved his mouse aside. "I have most of the content down. The formatting though is driving me crazy. It keeps shifting all over the place."

"Well, you need to hurry up. I need to get you to the airport."

He gave his friend a quelling look. "You think I don't know that?"

Diggle's lips twitched. "Why don't you ask Felicity to help?"

"Help with what?" On cue she marched into his office while unbuttoning her navy blue coat.

Oliver glanced up and saw her walking toward him, her cheeks rosy from the cold.  _She's lovely._  Annoyed at himself he pointed to his machine. "This damn presentation!" Clenching his jaw as his cursor hopped around the screen, he cursed again.

"Whoa," she replied. "Who knew we had a sailor among us?"

The glare he sent her way did nothing to dampen her amusement. "Move. I'll fix it."

"There's no time," Diggle said. "We have to go. The jet is fueled and ready to depart."

Oliver stood, ignoring the enticing scent of her perfume as she squeezed past him and sat in his place. "What on earth is this mess?" she asked, more to herself than to them. Realising that she'd spoken out loud she flashed him a rueful smile. "The formatting. Not the content."

"You haven't even read the content," he pointed out.

"Err…right." He watched as she smothered another grin, moved the mouse aside and used her hands to activate the keyboard shortcuts. Catching his hopeful expression and Diggle's eye on the clock, she looked down at the screen again. "This is going to take a while."

Oliver's shoulders slumped. "I'll have to wing it."  _Dammit._

"Man, I'm sorry to say it, but you're screwed."

"Not helping here, Dig," he warned, walking back towards his desk and shoving papers and folders into a small, portable suitcase.

"This is an important presentation, Oliver," Felicity reminded him as she followed him around the table, observing his haphazard packing. "You can't  _wing it_!"

Appearing outwardly calm while panicking inside, he pushed the laptop closed. "I'll try to figure it out once I get to the hotel." He wasn't feeling overly optimistic, but he'd make a plan. Picking up his mobile phone he slid it into the inner pocket of his jacket and marched to the door. "Dig, let's go. Felicity, let me know if anything important crops up, okay? Sara and Roy are aware that I'll be gone for the next two days. Don't call if you don't have to. I'll be in meetings most of the time so texts would work better." He rambled off some more instructions as he heard her running after him into the lift lobby, her heels frantically clicking against the tiled floor as she struggled to keep up.

"Oliver! Wait!"

Half turned towards her he called the lift. "Yeah?"

Something flashed across her face but disappeared so quickly he couldn't make out what it was. "Let me go with you."

His heart stopped. Surely he'd heard wrong. "What?" he asked softly.

She bit the inside of her lip. "I can help you with your presentation. This is way too important for you to mess up."

"Hey, that's not a bad idea," Diggle agreed.

Ignoring the other man he blinked at her, still not sure he'd heard right. "Felicity, I'll be fine. Besides, it would mean being away from Starling for two days and nights. I'm sure you have better things to do."

She frowned at him. "If I didn't know better I'd think you were trying to tell me that you don't need my help."

 _More like I don't think it's a good idea for me to be alone with you._  "Nonsense," he replied instead, "I just don't want to interfere with any plans you may have already made."

The lift pinged and opened. A few people stepped out while they continued to look at one another. "Let me come with you. I have no other plans and let's face it,  _you need me_ ," she reasoned.

He tried to swallow but his throat had gone dry at her words.  _You need me._  This was a mistake. It was one thing being around Felicity when there were other's to act as a buffer, but being completely alone with her wasn't something he knew how to handle. What if he did something stupid? How was he supposed to behave normally when she'd be right  _there._ Close enough to touch. No way. He couldn't allow it.

"Alright," he heard himself say as he stepped inside the lift. "I hope you can pack fast."  _This is a mistake._

* * *

_This is a mistake._

Felicity walked out of the bathroom stall at the Four Seasons Hotel and moved to the basin to wash her hands. Squeezing some of the luxurious soap into her palm, she lathered, looking into the mirror as she did so. Her hair could have done with a brush, but quite frankly, after a six hour plus flight, she was exhausted. Her lipstick had long since rubbed off and her eyes were red-rimmed from weariness. Despite the Queen jet being incredibly comfortable, trying to concentrate on work while sitting for hours on end beside one of the most attractive men she knew had taken its toll on her self-control.

Of course that's what she chose to blame her recent aberrations on. Fatigue. How else would she explain how her pulse had skidded to a halt every time his thigh had accidentally brushed against hers and then thundered back to life when he peered over her shoulder as she worked on fixing his presentation? His nearness, combined with the masculine smell of his aftershave and the soft blow of his breath against her neck when he spoke had wound her tighter than a two dollar watch. By the time they landed in New York she was almost ready to jump out of her skin.

To be fair, she knew he wasn't being deliberate. Obviously. It wasn't like Oliver suddenly found her irresistible. Not that she wanted him to either. She felt guilty enough as it was, sucked back into that space she'd thought she'd abandoned a long time ago. In truth, she couldn't deny that she clearly still found him attractive. After all, he wasn't bad on the eyes. But there was more to it than just his good looks. She'd always been able to ignore his external appeal when he tried to use it to his advantage. He'd never been able to charm her the way he did other women purely because she could see right through the act and didn't find it all that appealing.

But this wasn't the same Oliver. He was different; changing. He was less rash and hot-headed for starters, often asking for their collective input instead of merely dishing out orders and expecting everyone to follow blindly. He seemed more patient with Roy, taking the time to guide him and giving advice without sounding like a dictator. As a result, Roy was less confrontational and more open to thinking before acting. Then there was his relationship with Sara. When they'd broken up, she'd expected open hostility followed by icy civility. To her surprise, there'd been none of that. In fact, they got along better than ever. Oliver treated Sara with deference and kindness and in turn, she continued to be his loyal partner and friend. That was so unlike his previous break-ups. Most, if not all of them, had ended really badly. Then, much to her surprise and obvious approval, he'd finally stepped up and accepted his role at, and responsibility towards, Queen Consolidated. Despite the Arrow keeping his nights occupied, he performed his duty to his family legacy with the dedication and importance it deserved.

Lastly, his behaviour towards her had also changed. Gone were the edicts of where she should go and what she should do. In its place were courteous consultations and a marked respect for her time, her skills and her personal life. She no longer felt like she was a chess piece that he moved around at will, ignoring her autonomy and occasionally taking her for granted. He stayed out of her relationship with Adam, and while he never pointedly asked her about it, he didn't hamper its progress in any way. In fact, she'd even go as far as calling him  _supportive_.

And that was the exact problem. All the things about him that had always kept her attraction at bay were slowly fading away and as such, she couldn't help being fascinated and intrigued by his shifting priorities and altered outlook. The man who she'd always believed could be so much more than he chose to be, seemed to finally be growing up.

Startled from her thoughts when the bathroom door opened, she quickly rinsed and dried her hands before hurrying back into the foyer. She found Oliver at the reception counter.

"That's completely unacceptable," she heard him say.

Reaching his side, she addressed him while looking at the flustered woman desperately scanning the computer screen in front of her. "What's going on?"

The woman spoke again. "I'm sorry, Mr. Queen, I've checked and re-checked. Because of multiple conventions in the city this coming weekend, we're fully booked."

Felicity watched as he took a calming breath before asking with a feeling akin to dread, "Oliver, what's the problem?"

He turned to look at her, his face a mixture of irritation and frustration. "They never received the amended reservation we made before boarding. The last room was taken just before we arrived."

She tried not to show her panic _. This isn't happening_. Knowing what he was going to say, but needing to be sure, she probed, "So what exactly does this mean?"

Meeting her gaze, he replied, "We have to share a room.


	21. Chapter 21

"W-What?" Felicity asked, rhetorically. She'd heard his statement; she just refused to believe it. They couldn't share a room.  _No way._

Oliver, for his part, looked equally unhappy with the situation and was probably not in the best mood to deal with inefficiencies. Fatigue was etched onto his face; his eyes were bloodshot, his voice just a tad gruff. Having caught a glimpse of herself earlier, she knew she didn't look or feel any better. She watched as he ran a frustrated hand through his hair. "This won't work, I know. Let's just try another hotel." He turned away to talk to the woman at the check-in counter.

Felicity listened as he briskly issued instructions, both his tone and manner brooking no opposition. Sighing, she eyed a plush chair longingly, wishing she could sink into its comforting folds to find oblivion and as a bonus, wake up in her own bedroom. But knowing that wasn't a possibility, she'd settle for a warm bath and a cozy place to sleep. She'd worry about giving Oliver's presentation a final once-over in the morning. Had she known that impulsively offering her services to help him would result in them potentially being roommates, she would have stayed put. But harping on it wouldn't change the situation. She'd come along and now she had to deal with the consequences.

Leaning against the counter, she watched as Oliver rubbed a hand across the back of his neck before reaching forward and impatiently tugging at the knot of his tie. It was late and it had been a long day. If she was honest, the idea of having to trek somewhere else was not at all appealing, but could she handle the alternative? Wouldn't it be a little too intimate?  _Come on, Felicity, it's not like he's suddenly going to be overcome by some rabid passion and throw himself at you._  The thought made her frown. It was true. They'd spent hours together at the foundry, alone, sometimes throughout the night when they were working on a lead. Wasn't this the same thing? Well, sort of. Almost. Okay, not entirely. This was the Four Seasons, not a basement. But she supposed the principal was probably the same. It wasn't as though anything would happen. They were both adults and Oliver didn't see her in that way. Besides, she had a boyfriend who she'd never betray. Surely they could handle one night together?

Sneaking another look at Oliver's resigned face, she stepped closer to him and addressed the tall woman who had a phone in her hand, her fingers poised and ready to dial. "Will you have an extra room available in the morning?"

The brunette rustled through some papers. "Yes, Miss Smoak. We have a few overnighters that are checking out tomorrow."

Resolved, she turned to Oliver. "It's okay. I'm sure we can manage for one night."

He turned to look at her, clearly surprised. "I don't want you to feel uncomfortable, Felicity. We can move to another hotel. That won't be a problem."

"I appreciate the offer, thank you, but I'm tired and I don't relish the thought of having to move again. It's no big deal, really." She wasn't sure who she was trying to convince more, him or her. Sensing his unease, she placed a hand at his elbow reassuringly. "It's just for one night," she reiterated. "Besides, it's bound to be a mini palace, so privacy shouldn't be an issue."

She looked at the clerk for confirmation. "Yes, it's one of our premier suites. There's only one bedroom, but more than enough space to accommodate you separately."

Oliver still looked doubtful. "Are you sure?"

Was she? "Yes."

Acquiescing, he gave the woman an imperceptible nod and within seconds their bags were whisked away while they followed at a more sedate pace. "We'll straighten this out tomorrow, first thing," he guaranteed.

She only nodded, not knowing what else to say. She chose to blame her recent lapses in judgment on exhaustion. How else would she explain coming to New York with Oliver and then agreeing to share a room with him? Or rather, a  _suite_ , she corrected as she walked through the entrance hall of her temporary home and into a spacious and luxurious lounge. It was  _huge._  Decorated in muted beiges and creams, it was pure extravagance, something she might have appreciated more if she hadn't been so wound up. Looking around, slightly in awe, she spied a set of fancy looking double doors at one end of the room which she assumed lead into the bedroom. There was another room, the door standing open, which was clearly a study. The large wooden desk and ornate chairs looked expensive, that area alone probably larger than her entire apartment. Good. Space wouldn't be a problem.

Walking past a guest toilet en-route back to the lounge, she heard the door to the suite close with a soft click. Fiddling with the strap of her purse, the reality of their situation finally sunk in. They were alone. No Diggle, no Sara and no Roy to act as a buffer. Oliver was standing, hands in pockets, looking at her. She couldn't read his expression, so in an attempt to do something other than staring back she slowly shrugged out of her coat and she threw it over the back of a plush sofa. Unsure of how to defuse the growing tension, which was rapidly morphing into a whole lot of awkward, she tried to think of words to fill the void.

"You can have the bedroom," he said without preamble.

"Oh, no," she objected. "You've paid for this. You deserve the room."

A faint smile tugged at his lips. "Five years on a desert island means I'm more comfortable on practically anything other than an actual bed."

She smiled at that. She'd seen him napping on the floor many times.

"Take the room," he urged softly.

"Thanks, I will."

He nodded and grabbed her suitcase, carrying it into the bedroom. She followed him, gasping as she stepped into the room. Before her was a bed the size of Manhattan. Similarly Oliver, still in his suit, looked equally large and dominating as he placed her bag on top of the snowy white coverlet. She'd never been in a bedroom with him before and certainly not under these, or similar, circumstances. While he'd never made any advances towards her that were anything but platonic, their proximity to the enormous bed set her nerves on edge.

"It's late," he said, hovering. "You should probably get some sleep. I'll use the bathroom first, if you don't mind. That way I won't have to disturb you again."

"Yeah, sure." Suddenly she felt wide awake. "I'll, err, get some tea in the meantime."

Hurrying out she called room service from the study and ordered her choice of hot beverage. She could hear Oliver moving about, the zip of his suitcase opening and closing, the soft thud of the extra linen from the closet as it hit the sofa, his footfalls as he moved about the room. By the time she hung up the phone, he'd stepped into the bathroom and thankfully closed the door behind him. Walking back into the bedroom, she could hear the water running.

Grabbing her mobile, she dialed Adam's number. He answered on the third ring. "Hey, I was hoping to hear from you."

Felicity smiled, immediately feeling better. "How's Chicago?"

"Cold and lonely," he replied with a sigh. "New York?"

"Unexpectedly full," she said vaguely.

"Full?"

Felicity wasn't going to lie to him any more than she had to. "The hotel messed up our reservation so Oliver and I are sharing." She said it casually, hoping he wouldn't read into it.

Silence greeted her statement. "Define sharing," he said eventually.

"It's just for one night. He's in the lounge, I'm in the bedroom. No big deal." She hoped she sounded convincing.

"I trust you, Felicity, but Oliv-"

His words stabbed at her conscience. "Doesn't see me that way," she interjected. "We're colleagues and friends. That's all."

His laugh sounded relieved. "I'm sorry. It's just that  _I_ would rather be the one sharing with you."

Grinning like a fool, she threw herself onto the bed and stared at the ceiling. "Let's do dinner as soon as you get back?"

"It's a date," he promised. She heard a commotion in the background. "I have to get back," he said reluctantly. "I'll call you in the morning?"

"Okay."

"Felicity?" he called as she was about to hang up.

"Yeah?"

His voice filled with all the warmth she'd come to expect, he whispered, "I miss you."

Smiling as she signed off, she heard the bathroom door open. Turning her head toward the sound, she was glad she was in the horizontal position. Standing, her knees might have turned to jelly. Oliver emerged from the shower with a towel slung low over his hips, a billowing cloud of steam trailing in his wake. She'd seen him in various forms of undress many times, but their current circumstances made this time seem more than just a little different.

Jumping to her feet, her mouth dry, she blurted, "That's hot."

* * *

 

Oliver stepped out of the shower, his mind a mess. The plane ride had been pure torture. Felicity had sat right beside him, the vanilla scent of her shampoo invading his senses while the hoops of her gold earrings attempted to hypnotise him as they swung to and fro. He'd been so distracted that he was surprised she hadn't picked up on his strange behaviour. He hadn't been expecting to spend his first night in New York sharing a suite with her. He'd been surprised when she'd agreed to it since he hadn't thought it was a good idea. In the end, he'd agreed because there was no logical reason why they couldn't make it work. They'd spent so much time in each other's company over the past few years that one night alone shouldn't be an issue. Except it was. Having her so close was messing with his resolve to steer clear of her, to keep things friendly and professional. It was obvious that she was serious about Donner and he wanted to support her choice, difficult as that was.

Drying off, he wrapped a towel around his waist, grabbed an extra one for his hair and walked out of the bathroom. Felicity, who he'd assumed would be in the other room, scrambled off the bed hastily. Facing him, her cheeks slightly flushed, she blurted, "That's hot."

Startled, he raised an eyebrow. "What?"

She closed her eyes briefly and waved a dismissive hand in front of her face. "Oh, nothing. I-I meant it looks hot… the shower." She must have noticed his confused look because she continued, "Err… because of all the steam coming in… you know… hot steam…" Her voice trailed off with a self-conscious giggle.

Shaking his head to dispel her nonsensical rambling he noticed that the skirt of her royal blue dress was completely rumpled and her hair more tousled than usual. For some reason her state of dishevel made him smile. "I'm done so you can head on in if you'd like."

"O-oh kay," she said, looking at him with a curious mixture of embarrassment and something else. Eyes narrowed, he cocked his head to the side, trying to figure out what he was missing. He was sure he recognized…  _No._  His heart lurched in his chest.  _Interest?_ Unconsciously, he took a step towards her.

Her eyes widened as he drew closer, her hands fidgeting nervously. "Thank you, for… err… bringing my bag in… to the room."

"You're welcome." Her cheeks filled with colour under the intensity of his scrutiny as he closed the remaining distance between them, his chest mere inches from hers. With her head titled upward to look at him he lifted a hand and gently brushed a lock of hair away from her forehead. Peering at him uncertainly, her regard was a combination of curiosity, caution and vulnerability. It was that vulnerability that hit him squarely in the gut.

_What the hell am I doing?_

He'd promised himself that he wouldn't take advantage of her, that he'd show her that he was different, that he was changing. If he allowed his baser instincts to take over, he'd only prove that he was no better than before, that deep down he was still as selfish and as thoughtless as ever. Even if he did kiss her, what was he hoping to achieve? She was with someone else, in a committed relationship. Felicity was not the kind of woman who could ever live with being unfaithful or disloyal. She'd hate herself if she succumbed and then later she'd hate him for putting her in that position.

She deserved more than a few stolen moments and he cared too much about her to risk ruining whatever was left between them. If they ever found themselves in a position to take their relationship further, it would be a mutual decision and not one he forced on her in an instant of weakness. Hard as it was, he stepped back, knowing it was the right thing to do.

There was a knock at the door. "That's probably room service," he said softly, turning away from her and clenching his fists tightly in an attempt to stop himself from acting on his impulses.

"Yeah," he heard her murmur as she swiftly departed.

Cursing, he walked into the study to get dressed.

An hour later, comfortable on the sofa, he still couldn't sleep. Felicity had gone to bed soon after her tea had arrived and he hadn't seen or heard from her since she closed the double doors between them. It had taken a lot to step away from her, from all the questions that plagued him, from all the scenarios that played out in his mind but never quite seemed to reach any conclusions. Every time he thought about her and what she meant to him, he was reminded of how he'd managed to screw up the connection that had once existed between them. His behaviour had ultimately driven her further away and for that he had no one to blame but himself. Roy had been right. How he treated her mattered. But fool that he was, he'd only realized it too late.

The truth was that he was tired of disappointing the people he cared about. Diggle had warned him about the pitfalls of taking her for granted and then deciding selfishly that he wanted her regardless of the cost to others. Placing his desires above what he knew was best for her wasn't worth it if it meant losing what was left between them. Felicity had chosen Adam and until she decided that he wasn't what she wanted, Oliver would not place her in a position where she ended up betraying her own morals and beliefs. He didn't want that for her. She was one of the few principled people still in his life and if he took that away from her, he'd turn her into something she was never meant to be – he'd turn her into  _him_  – a thing he would never forgive himself for.

Knowing that he wouldn't get any sleep, he threw the blanket aside and pulled on some clothes. Perhaps a bit of fresh air would help clear his mind. Slipping outside, he couldn't help thinking that doing the right thing might make him a better person, but it was cold comfort when he knew that the woman he cared so much for was at that very moment probably thinking about somebody else.


	22. Chapter 22

Felicity sat outside the glass enclosed conference venue and watched Oliver as he presented his vision for Queen Consolidated to the Board. While she couldn't hear what he was saying, she could detect from his relaxed demeanor that things were going well. She'd spent about half an hour that morning tweaking a few things here and there until she was satisfied that they'd be impressed with his labours. She'd certainly been. Oliver must have spent a considerable amount of time and effort preparing for his meeting because it showed. She'd expected figures and statistics, the solid and irrefutable facts about the company, but he'd put more than that in, he'd added some heart too, the one thing that showed that his interest was more than just casual and fleeting. Queen Consolidated meant something to him and whatever had brought about the change in his outlook, she was certainly glad for it.

Watching as the men in the room shook hands with him, their responses eager and enthusiastic, she felt a surge of pride. He wasn't the same man she'd thought she knew inside out; the guy who'd slept with Isobel because the opportunity had presented itself, who'd gone after his ex-girlfriend knowing that his best friend was still in love with her, who'd shirked his responsibilities to his legacy because it hadn't ranked high enough on his list of priorities. Apparently now it did.

Closing her tablet she placed it back in her purse and caught sight of her hotel room key. As promised, she'd been relocated earlier that morning to a room much smaller than Oliver's, but more than sufficient for her needs. After the previous night's weird encounter, she knew that she couldn't stay in such close proximity to him. For a split second she'd thought he was going to kiss her. Silly she knew, but when he'd been so close, looking at her so intently, she'd half imagined that he could read her mind. Caught off guard, she was afraid that she might have betrayed herself, revealed too much. But then he'd pulled away and she'd been relieved.  _And disappointed?_ Arguing with her conscience was always frustrating because she couldn't lie to herself. Thinking back, there had been a flicker of regret before relief had coursed through her. Kissing him would have changed everything between them, at least for her, and it would have ruined her relationship with Adam. In the end, as planned, she'd slept in the bedroom and Oliver had stayed in the lounge. She was almost certain that she'd heard him leave at some point, but since she'd thought it wise not to face him again, she'd let it go. Regardless, the world had righted itself again and they were back to being just Oliver and Felicity. Nothing more, nothing less.  _Right._

Okay, so maybe there was more to it. Maybe after last night her heart felt as though it was at war. All the feelings she'd been burying, pushing down deep inside in the hopes that it would simply disappear were fighting to once more take root within her.  _This_ Oliver, the one who was kind to Sara and attentive to Roy and unselfish with his time, was messing with her head and her heart. He was making her doubt herself, doubt her feelings and her choices. He was making her wonder if she'd ever really managed to purge him from her system, or if he'd always been there, lurking in the shadows, waiting for the right moment to pounce and catch her unawares. Lately she'd been feeling more and more confused and the events of the last day hadn't helped make things any clearer. If anything, the picture was murkier than ever and the fuzzier it became, the guiltier she felt. She didn't want to have a resurgence of feelings for this apparently changed man. She wanted to be cured, over it, moving on. Having romantic feelings for Oliver Queen was like waiting for rain in a desert; useless and disappointing.

She was roused from her bothersome thoughts when the conference door opened and a dozen or so men filed out, dispersing in different directions. Oliver brought up the rear.

"And?" she asked anxiously, jumping to her feet, instantly forgetting her troubles.

He smiled. "I'll know their decision by tomorrow, but I think it's looking good."

With an excited yelp, she spontaneously launched herself at him, standing on her toes as she threw her arms around his neck, wrapping him in a tight embrace. "I knew you could do it!"

Slowly, almost reluctantly she noted, his arms enclosed around her as he held her lightly against him. "I couldn't have done it without you," he whispered, the warmth of his breath tickling her ear.

Pulling back slightly, she beamed at him. "No, Oliver, this was all you. I made it look pretty, but those were your words up there. Your ideas."

"I'm not out of the woods yet. They could still vote in Isobel's favour," he reminded her judiciously.

She rolled her eyes at him. "Not a chance," she countered. "But if you'd prefer we can hold off on all celebrations until it's official."

Chuckling, he leaned forward slightly. "Thank you, Felicity. For everything."

It was at that moment that she realized that they were still locked in an embrace, her arms resting on his shoulders while his hands splayed around her waist, their weight like hot brands on her skin. Looking at him, she knew the instant he realized it too. He stiffened slightly, his hands lifting away from her just as hers slid away from him. Flushed, she nervously adjusted her spectacles. "It was nothing, really."

Awkwardly facing one another, he half turned towards the boardroom. "I need to pack up." Glancing at his watch, he gestured for her to precede him. "My next meeting isn't for another hour and a half. Feel like grabbing a drink?"

Her heart rate returning to normal, she asked, "I thought we weren't celebrating yet?"

"Technically we're not. It's more of a let's-remain-positive kind of thing."

Smiling, she grabbed her purse as they exited the room. "Whatever. Sounds like a celebration to me."

"Or perhaps it's an excuse to," he said, returning her grin.

"You say it like it's a bad thing?"

Side by side they walked down a long corridor. "There hasn't been much to celebrate lately."

She cast a sympathetic glance in his direction. "How are things with your mother?"

He shrugged. "Tense. We don't really see that much of each other at the moment."

"You can't avoid her forever, you know," she reminded him gently as they took a seat at the bar on the ground floor.

He caught a waitress's eye. "There's not much left to say, Felicity. She knows how I feel and she just keeps making these selfish choices."

Felicity quirked an eyebrow. "Seriously? I get why you're mad at her, but it's not like you haven't made some decisions in your life that you wish you could change."

"You're defending my mother?" he asked in disbelief as he removed his suit jacket and hung it over the back of his chair.

She held a hand up. "I wouldn't call it that, exactly. I'm merely trying to point out that she's made some mistakes. Surely you can identify with that? She's done some bad things, Oliver, but that doesn't make her a bad person."

He acknowledged her words with a faint nod. "I just keep thinking about Thea and how this would tear her apart."

"Why haven't you told her?" she asked curiously.

He went so still that she thought he wasn't going to respond. To her surprise, he did. "Because I'm afraid of what knowing the truth will do to her."

Felicity could understand that. Oliver had always been very protective of Thea. It made sense that he'd want to shelter her from any pain. "You can't protect her forever and I think that she's stronger than you give her credit for. Besides, secrets have a nasty way of coming out and I think you'd prefer that she heard it from someone she loved rather than someone with an agenda."

Oliver looked away, as though he couldn't meet her eyes. "The same could be said for you," he said softly.

Her stomach dropped to the floor. "What do you mean?"

The waitress placed their orders in front of them. "Adam?"

Her throat suddenly parched, she took a cautious sip. "Are you saying my relationship with him is doomed to fail?"

"There's no way I could know that, Felicity. I'm just saying that there is a big lie that exists between you."

She knew he was right and she wasn't offended that he'd raised it. After all, he had a fair point. It just felt strange discussing her current life choices with the man she'd once had, or rather  _still had_ , feelings for.

Scowling, she sat back, peering at him. "You know that I would never betray your trus-"

"Felicity, please. The thought never even crossed my mind." He appeared to hesitate for a second. "But if you had the choice, would you want to tell him the truth?"

* * *

Oliver held his breath as he waited for her answer. It came swift and sure.

"Yes," she said unequivocally. "You, better than anyone else know what it's like to keep secrets from the people closest to you and how damaging that can be. Trust," she said, her gaze unwavering, "is as important to me as breathing. That's why I told you about Thea. Because I know how much it means to you too." She looked down at her glass. "I'm not naïve, you know. I realize that at some point there might be a choice that I have to make, but right now, I'm not quite ready to make it."

Her words chilled him. "Choice?"

She squirmed a little in her seat. "Come on, Oliver. You know what I mean."

"You'd actually consider leaving…"  _Me._  Instead, he said, "Queen Consolidated?" He knew she'd know he meant their vigilantism, among other things.

He watched her fidget with her straw. "Honestly, I don't know. Maybe. I haven't really given it much thought."

Oliver felt his heart sink. "You care that much about him?"

"I  _do_  care about him but as of this second my staying or leaving is not a reality I have to face."

"But it may become one," he stated.

Their eyes locked. "It may," she admitted. "Someday."

Oliver felt his mind reel. He'd known she cared about Donner and he'd resigned himself to the fact that they were in a relationship and that it was important to her. But for some foolish reason he'd never, not for one second, considered that she might want a life with Adam more than she wanted to fight at his side.

"Oliver, are you alright?" Her face was filled with concern as she reached out and lightly touched his hand.

The contact jarred him, his fingers wanting nothing more than to curl around hers and never let go. "What?"

"You look pale," she insisted.

Taking a deep breath despite the tightness in his chest, he forced a smile. "I'm okay. Brain freeze," he explained, pointing to his drink.

Not quite convinced, she asked, "Are you sure?"

"Yeah." He moved his hand away from hers. "So, how's Adam's preparation going for the Davis hearing?"

She hesitated and he knew that she felt awkward discussing Donner with him. "Okay, last time we talked. He's pretty happy that all the data he's got is solid. It should be pretty straight forward."

"You did great work on that," he complimented sincerely. Felicity had a way of finding information in places he wouldn't even think to look.

"Thank you," she replied, clearly pleased at his praise. "I'm sure it's enough to convince a judge to set a date for the trial."

"It is," he agreed. She'd been thorough. There was no way Davis would get off.

"By the way, I think you're doing a great job with Roy." It didn't go unnoticed that she changed the subject.

He thought back to the last conversation he'd had with the younger man. In hindsight, Roy was the one who'd done a good job with him. "He's not so bad," Oliver admitted.

"That's what we've all been telling you."

He laughed. "True. Roy is surprisingly insightful."

"Oh?" she asked taking another sip of her drink while she waited for him to elaborate.

"It's nothing particular," he evaded. "Just some things we spoke about a couple of days ago."

"You're finally accepting his place in Thea's life?"

He was. Roy loved his sister. "Yeah, I am. They're good for each other."

Her mouth fell open.

"What?" he asked defensively.

She blinked. "Wow. I guess I just never thought I'd hear you say it."

"You don't agree?"

"Of course I do.  _I_ ," she said, pointing a bright blue nail at her chest, "always knew that. What changed  _your_  mind?"

He shrugged. "I guess I realized that I needed to stop trying to control Thea's life. If she wants to be with Roy, then I should respect her decision."

Felicity stared at him in shock. "Oliver," she asked, suddenly serious. "What's happened to you?"

He pretended to misunderstand. "What are you talking about?"

She glared at him, seeing through his attempt at subterfuge. "You know what I mean. You're  _different_. Less irritable, for one," she teased before turning serious again. "But it's more than that. You seem to be more… _attentive_. Why?"

 _Because of you. Because you've made me see things in a way I've never seen them before._  He stalled. "It's nothing."

"Oliver! Stop pretending like something isn't going on with you, because we both know that's not true." Her anger took him aback.

"Felic-"

" _Why?_  Why the change?" she asked, imploringly.

He looked at her, her blue eyes staring at him keenly, willing him to be honest. His throat clogged up, making it difficult to speak. His mouth moved, but no words were forthcoming. He didn't want to lie to her, but what was he supposed to say when the truth clearly wasn't an option?

"I-"  _I think I'm in love with you? I've realized that I've been the biggest fool on the planet and I'd give anything to have things between us be as easy and uncomplicated as they were before I messed it up? That I spend every conceivable moment thinking about you and wondering how I could ever have been so blind_ She stared at him for so long that for one panic stricken moment he thought he'd actually said those words out loud. "F-"

"Nevermind. I'm sorry." She raised her hands apologetically. "I have no right to pry and you certainly owe me no explanations." Her smile was contrite, but he sensed a tinge of disappointment too.

Shaking his head, he replied, "Felicity, you don't have to apologise-"

" _Oliver Queen_? Is that  _you_?"

Annoyed at the interruption, he glanced to the side and saw a tall blonde standing beside their table. She looked vaguely familiar. "Hi," he said distractedly, standing to greet the woman while his eyes swung back to look at Felicity. He had to make her understand.

"You remember me, right? Kim Wilson? We dated in our senior year?" She gave him a huge smile before flinging herself at him, planting an ardent kiss on his lips. Taken by surprise, he grabbed hold of her to steady himself as she continued to kiss him.

"I should go," he heard Felicity say.

Breaking the kiss, he glared at Kim, setting her aside roughly. "Felicity, wait."

She didn't meet his eyes. "No, you carry on with your…reunion. I'll see you later." Grabbing her coat and purse, he cursed as he watched her hurrying from the bar. Closing his eyes briefly he couldn't shake the feeling that he'd unintentionally hurt her in some fundamental way.


	23. Chapter 23

 

Felicity had realized the second she reached the hotel that she'd grossly overreacted to seeing Oliver's blast from the past throwing herself at him.  _She'd_  kissed him, not the other way around. Sitting at her computer terminal at the foundry, her thoughts strayed to how she'd struggled to detangle what had actually happened from whatever scenario she'd conjured up in her mind. In all honesty, she'd had no right to be upset about it. It was Oliver's life and who he chose to spend his personal time with shouldn't concern her. Only, it did. And that was the part she battled coming to terms with. She hated that it affected her, that the sight of the beautiful woman throwing herself into his arms had brought to mind flashbacks of all the other times she'd watched him getting close to practically every female in in Starling City, except her. Being party to the trail of broken hearts he'd left in his wake had hurt a lot.

But then she'd met Adam and things had started to change. She'd blossomed under his care and attention. She enjoyed his company and how comfortable she felt around him, even right from the start, he'd never given her cause to doubt him or his intentions. She liked that he made her feel like his equal - someone he could consult with, share ideas with, use as a sounding board – instead of just running roughshod over her. Add to that the fact that she was wildly attracted to him and he was practically the man of her dreams.

Yet, despite her clear feelings for Adam, and they  _were_  absolutely real, this new Oliver kept trying to burrow back into her heart. She'd thought that she'd shut him out for good after he and Sara had gotten together because that had finally felt like one step too far. After all the subtle changes she'd started noticing in him, seeing him with Kim had brought back the not-so-pleasant thought that maybe he hadn't changed at all. Maybe she'd been imagining the shift in him because she'd wanted to see it for so long.

But what did it really matter? How Oliver lived his life had no bearing on her at all. Even if he became a  _better_  man, it still wouldn't make him the  _right_  man for her. She had a shot at real happiness and she was allowing old insecurities to get in the way. It was time that it ended. She needed to stop pretending to be over Oliver and actually  _be_  over him; take that final leap that pushed her outside of the hole she'd been buried in since she'd met him. Holding onto unrealistic dreams meant missing out on all the wonderful opportunities that could pass her by unnoticed because she was so focused on trying to turn a fantasy into a reality.

All that said, her relationship with Adam was not without its challenges. Finally she meets someone who she could actually see herself with long term and she was scared to death that it wouldn't last. How long could she continue to lie to him? At what point would she have to let him go? Or, and this was the hardest of all to contemplate, should she be the one to walk away from  _this_  life in order to make a new one with him? The thought was more than a little sobering.

They'd been back from New York for a couple of days and after the incident with Kim and her subsequent reflection, she'd pretended that nothing was amiss when Oliver had returned from his meeting. Thankfully, despite trying to raise the issue a few times without any encouragement from her, he'd let it go. The rest of the trip had thankfully passed without a hitch. That didn't mean that there wasn't an undercurrent between them. Ever since that almost kiss something felt different. Like they were both aware that there was a shift in their relationship - a boundary had moved, but neither one was willing to acknowledge it. It was that exact same  _something_  that brought on all her feelings of guilt. She shouldn't be carrying a torch for her employer when she had a wonderful man in her life, a man who didn't deserve to be caught in the middle of her emotional crisis. She knew how she'd feel if the shoe was on the other foot. Adam trusted her and right now, she wasn't exactly worthy of it.

"Earth to Felicity."

She snapped out of her musings to see Diggle walking around her chair to face her. "Sorry," she smiled apologetically. "I was just thinking."

"Looks pretty heavy," he stated, folding his arms across his broad chest.

She sighed. "Dig, do you think it's possible for me to have a long term relationship with Adam without telling him the truth?"

He took a moment before answering and she guessed it was because he hadn't been expecting the direct question. Relaxing against the table on which her computer terminals stood, he crossed one ankle over the other. "Honestly? I guess it depends on the individuals involved."

She frowned. "Meaning?"

"There are thousands of men and women the world over who live secret lives and manage to hide who they are and what they do from those closest to them quite successfully. I'm not saying that it's easy for them, just that they're doing what they have to do. It is what it is." It wasn't hard to read between the lines.

"But they aren't me," she stated flatly.

"Felicity, you're young and smart and beautiful. It's natural that you'll eventually want more than hiding out down here, hacking into secret databases. You'll want a home to go to, perhaps a husband, kids. Do you think you could make that kind of commitment to someone without sharing  _all_ of who you are?"

Could she? He looked at her thoughtfully and she bit her lip, pondering his words despite knowing deep within her gut that she already knew the answer. "No, I don't think I could." Somehow saying it out loud felt like another betrayal. This time to Oliver and Diggle. "I'm sorry."

He shook his head at her. "Don't even think it. There is no rule anywhere that says you have to sacrifice everything good in your life in order to continue fighting this fight."

"I like fighting this fight," she defended.

"Trust me when I say that it can be very lonely at times."

Curiosity prompted her to ask, "Why have you stayed?"

He looked across the room but didn't seem to be staring at anything in particular. "The army took everything out of me. When I came back home, I didn't know what normal was anymore. I tried to fit in again, to do the things I enjoyed before I enlisted but it wasn't easy. I felt out of place, like everything I'd been through meant that I could no longer relate to any of my former friends, like my life didn't have any meaning. Meeting Oliver and working alongside him, it's given me a new purpose. At the end of the day, I couldn't deal with having to lie to Carly. That's not my idea of how a relationship is supposed to be. Believe me, I thought about telling her, but I knew it would be the selfish thing to do. I couldn't put her life or A.J's at risk because I wanted to feel better about living a double life."

"So," she said softly. "You chose Oliver."

"No," he denied. "I chose me." She looked at him in surprise. "I need this, Felicity. Right now, where my life's at, I need to feel useful. What I needed and what I knew Carly wanted didn't gel. It's not to say that there won't come a time when I feel differently, it's just that right now, I'm where I belong."

She belonged here too, right? "I'm needed here. I have a responsibility to this team, to Oliver, to you. This is the most important thing I've ever been a part of, Dig. I love what I do. Maybe that does mean making certain sacrifices."

Dig leaned forward and placed a large hand on her shoulder. "Felicity, you don't owe us your life. I can't tell you what to do. Only you know what the right choice will be if and when that time comes. Look, it may not even happen for a long time yet. I just want you to remember that signing up to be a part of this team didn't mean that you had to give up on every other dream you've ever had."

It hadn't seemed like she was giving anything up when she'd joined Oliver and his crusade. In fact, it had felt like she'd gained so much by being in a position to contribute to something good in a way she hadn't been able to before. Granted, at that time, she hadn't been involved with someone as wonderful as Adam. "There is a part of me that wishes that I could just tell Adam the truth. I know that makes me selfish too, right?"

Diggle stood, shoving his hands into his pockets. "You can't compare Carly to Adam. Two very different people in two completely different circumstances. Besides, I don't think you're actually contemplating telling him, are you?"

She shook her head vehemently. "No. I would never do that without Oliver's permission. It's his secret to tell. Besides, it's not like Adam and I are  _that_ serious."

"Maybe  _you're_ not, but I've seen the way he looks at you. It's serious to him." On that note, he squeezed her shoulder gently before heading toward the stairs.

Her stomach seized with butterflies, she wondered if the time for making a very difficult decision would be arriving a lot sooner than she'd initially thought.

* * *

Just before lunchtime Felicity popped into Adam's office to grab the spare key to his house that she knew he kept in his desk drawer. He was due back from Chicago that evening and she wanted to surprise him with a nice meal and a little bit of romance. Alice, still a formidable woman, was significantly less frosty towards her since she and Adam had become a couple.

Having called ahead, the older woman didn't bother to cancel the call she was on when Felicity waved at her en-route to Adam's office. With a half smile the older woman returned her wave with significantly less enthusiasm while continuing to chatter into the receiver. Not in the least offended, Felicity reached Adam's office door and let herself in. His desk was in slight disarray, a clear sign that he'd rushed off to the airport the week before. Smiling to herself, she made her way around the large piece of furniture and spotted a grey and white winter scarf draped haphazardly over the back of his chair. Drawn to it, she picked it up, loving the soft woolen texture against the skin of her palms. Without thinking, she lifted it to her nose and inhaled deeply. It smelled like him – warm and woodsy – and she was surprised by the rush of longing that flooded through her. Despite everything that was happening with Oliver, she'd missed him these past few days, and she was glad that he would be home soon.

Turning her face slightly, she let the soft wool caress her cheek.

"Missing me that much, are you?" came a familiar, teasing voice from the direction of the doorway.

Embarrassed, she whirled around and found herself staring into the face of the man she'd just been thinking about. Leaning casually against the doorjamb, he gave her a crooked smile. "Adam!" Letting out a squeal of delight, she hurried around the desk and towards him. Caught up in his arms, her nose pressed against his neck, that same deliciously manly aroma assaulting her senses. Pulling back slightly, he cupped her face, his eyes searching hers before his lips descended and meshed with hers in a kiss that left her slightly dizzy and more than a little breathless.

When he eventually lifted his head, she smiled at him. "You're early!"

He laughed, his arms moving down her back to circle around her waist. "I caught an earlier flight and thought I'd surprise you."

"Mission accomplished," she said, her hands running over the front of his crisp white shirt. It was so good to see him.

He tucked a wisp of hair that had come loose from her ponytail behind her ear. "Not that I don't love the sight of you cosying up to my clothing," he teased, her cheeks exploding with colour. "But I was not expecting to find you in my office."

Feeling a tad foolish, she explained. "I was coming to collect your spare key." At his raised eyebrow, she continued, "I wanted to cook for you as a welcome home type gesture. I know you mentioned keeping a key here. I'm sorry if you think that was out of line, I mean, you didn't exactly tell me I could use it…"

"Felicit-"

"I just assumed that you wouldn't mind. If you do-"

Her stream of words were cut off abruptly when he kissed her again. "Stop," he said, punctuating the word with a kiss, "speaking."

"Oh-kay."

"I'm sorry to have ruined your surprise. I would have loved to come home to find you there waiting for me."

Felicity swallowed. His words, their meaning crystal clear and hard to ignore, conjured a pretty domesticated scene in her mind. As though sensing her embarrassment, he went on, "I was actually planning on surprising you at  _your_ office, hence the fact that I didn't call ahead to let you know I'd be back sooner. I was just going to drop that," he nodded in the direction of a file that he must have dropped when they'd embraced, "off."

Felicity wasn't quite sure if it was a good idea for Adam to visit her at Queen Consolidated. Luckily it wasn't something she needed to deal with at that moment. "Then it seems that I saved you a trip."

He grinned. "Now that's what I call fate."

She laughed. "Speaking of trips, how was yours?" Adam picked up his navy blue blazer and threw it across his desk.

"Very productive actually. The Preliminary Hearing for the Perez case has been scheduled for next week. We're finally going to nail this bastard."

Adam seemed confident and she knew he had reason to be. His case was solid. "I can see you're rearing to go."

He bent down and collected the file from the floor. "It's been three years of hard work. Not just my own, but this entire department has put everything they have into trying to catch this guy. Finally, we have him. So yeah, I'm ready to go."

"How does this hearing work?" she asked, genuinely curious, sitting down in one of the chairs in front of his desk.

"Well, in my opinion, it's purely procedural. We present only enough evidence to the Judge to indicate probability of guilt since we don't want to reveal our trial strategy to the defense team and he or she makes a decision on whether or not there is sufficient grounds to go to trial."

She cocked her head to the side, intrigued. "So technically the judge could still rule in favour of the accused?"

Adam nodded. "Yes, but it won't happen in this case. The evidence is too compelling."

Suddenly Felicity felt nervous. A large part of Adam's arsenal was the information she dug up on Perez before Oliver caught him and left him for the Police. If she'd made one misstep, he could lose the case and if that happened, he'd be devastated. Guilt assaulted her again. If only she could just tell him the truth.

"Hey," Adam said, kneeling down beside her chair so their eyes were level. "It's open and shut. There's no way this guy is walking. Not with everything we have on him."

Trying to lighten the mood, she pushed her worries to the back of her mind and beamed at him. "You're amazing, you know that? And I missed you. A lot."

His eyes darkened and Felicity felt a shiver of anticipation dance down her spine. "I missed you, too" he whispered softly. His lips were about to touch hers when the jangle of his landline stopped him. Grinning at one another, he stood. "She's saved by the phone," he teased, sighing dramatically.

Half listening as he issued some instructions to the person on the other end, Felicity sat back and watched him. Dressed down in beige chinos and a white shirt, the top button undone to reveal the masculine column of his throat, he looked relaxed and happy. What had Diggle said?  _You don't owe us your life._  Would a potential lifetime with this strong, honorable man be such a bad choice? Was it one she could actually follow through with? Or did her job at Oliver's side mean more to her than Adam, or any man, ever could? When she was with him, it wasn't so hard to imagine being happy away from the adrenaline surging work she did on a near daily basis. Then when she was in the midst of helping the team catch a criminal, she couldn't envision ever wanting to do anything else.

Her gaze falling on the file Adam had under his hand, she felt another rush of worry. Perhaps she should go over the Perez intel again, just to be sure. Having one more look, just to allay her residual anxiety wouldn't be a waste. Perez was going to jail and Adam would be the man that put him there. The only thing left to do was to double check that she'd given him everything he needed to guarantee it.

Ending the call, he picked up his keys. "You haven't told me about New York. Do you have time for a quick lunch?"

Disappointed, she shook her head. "Unfortunately not. But I'm free for dinner?"

"I was hoping you'd say that," he said, planting a soft kiss on her lips before ushering her out of his office.


	24. Chapter 24

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A reminder that after this chapter, the story splits two ways:  
> Olicity fans can read up to Chapter 27.  
> Alicity fans can skip Chapters 25, 26 and 27 and continue reading from Chapter 28-30.

 

Oliver stepped into the lifts at Queen Consolidated and made the upward journey to his office. It had been a busy week, particularly in relation to his responsibilities as CEO of the company. Exiting on his floor, he turned the corner and couldn't miss Felicity in a short, bright orange dress that was belted at the waist as she walked down the corridor ahead of him, her blonde ponytail swaying enticingly against the back of her neck. These days, the sight of her never failed to raise his level of awareness; if she was in his vicinity, he knew about it.

Following at a slower pace, he watched as she rounded her desk, collected a file and carried it into his office. She noticed his presence only after she'd turned, about to walk back out.

"Oh," she said, slightly startled. "I didn't see you there." She looked distracted, her smile brief and forced.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to scare you."

Shrugging, she replied, "It's okay."

She moved to walk past him when he hastily asked, "Is there a reason the news is on every TV screen on this floor?" The latest headlines were scrolling across all the wall-mounted monitors he'd passed en-route to his office.

Stopping, she nodded. "Yeah, the Perez hearing is today." At his raised eyebrow, she explained, "Adam is hoping a date will be set for the trial."

 _Donner._  He couldn't escape the name, no matter how hard he tried. Clamping down on his annoyance, he replied smoothly, "You did good work. It should be an easy day in court."

He watched as her brow furrowed. "I hope so."

Concerned, he reached for her arm and touched it lightly. "Are you okay?" Pleased when she didn't pull away, he added, "You seem distracted."

"Just a little anxious. I spent the last couple of days going over all the details, wanting to make sure I didn't miss anything that could jeopardize his case," she remarked, running a hand absently across her collarbones.

He shoved his hands into his pockets so they wouldn't be tempted to do the same. "Did you find anything?"

"No, nothing new. My intel was solid."

He frowned. "Then why do you look so worried?"

She perched on the edge of a leather sofa. "Because I know how important this is to Adam and I also know that if something goes wrong because you were the one who captured Perez, then it would be my fault."

"Hey," Oliver said moving closer. "Nothing is going to go wrong. This is just procedural."

Felicity sighed. "That's what Adam said."

Oliver couldn't believe he was standing there, comforting her on behalf of her boyfriend. "Then he's probably right." She looked at him then, her usually bright eyes clouded with concern.  _She's genuinely worried about this._  Perching opposite her, he waited for her to speak.

"He isn't your biggest fan. Well, not  _you_  personally," she explained, flashing him an apologetic look. "But the Arrow. He grudgingly accepted the help you gave him by offering up Perez on a silver platter because the good putting that man behind bars would do outweighed his strong opposition to individuals taking the law into their own hands." She stood, walking to the expanse of windows opposite them. "He's driven by his innate sense that the justice system will prevail and that if laws are abided and procedures followed, there can be no place for corruption." With her back was to him, the morning sun cascaded around her, enveloping her in a radiant cocoon. Oliver forced himself to focus. "If Adam fails to bring Perez to justice because of some misstep I took, it would only reaffirm his belief that cutting corners leads to nothing but the dissolution of the very system he strives to uphold." She turned back. " _I_  would be responsible for him thinking that."

Oliver shook his head, moving to join her. "That's not true," he said firmly, his hands gently landing on her shoulders. "Whatever happens, you've done your part, Felicity. The rest is up to him."

She reached forward and smoothed the lapels of his jacket, his heart leaping at the contact. They hadn't been this close since that night in New York. "That's not how he'd see it if he knew the truth." Then hastily, she added, "He doesn't know of course; I swore I wouldn't tell him."

Oliver didn't bother to respond to that, he'd never questioned her loyalty. His mouth a little dry, he asked, "Are you afraid it might force you to break things off with him?" He wished he could stop the flood of hope that blossomed in his belly at the thought, but just as swiftly as the thought arrived, he quelled it. He was better than that.

She stared at his shirt, her fingers faintly stroking the fabric of his jacket between her fingers. He doubted she was even aware of what she was doing, or the effect it was having on him. "I don't know…maybe."

What a fool he was. All this time, Felicity had been right before his eyes and he'd failed to see how much he needed her. Now it was practically too late. If he told her how he felt, it would surely come across as him trying to sabotage her current romance so that he could have her all to himself; a knee jerk reaction to not being the center of attention.

Felicity cared about him. He'd always known she cared. But he'd done nothing to nurture those feelings and inadvertently, he'd driven her further away by being callous, inconsiderate and worst of all, taken her for granted. Despite that though, he knew there was still something there. She hadn't closed the door on him completely, even if she thought she had. The fact that they'd almost shared a kiss not too long ago was indicative of the fact that she wasn't as indifferent as she pretended to be. Would she ever admit to it? Would any attempt from him to win her be seen as genuine or only the result of his own selfish desires?

"There isn't anything more you can do right now, so stop worrying," he heard himself say. "You've done the absolute best you could and it will be enough."

She smiled at him and his heart turned over. "Thank you."

They stared at each other, his eyes probing, wanting desperately to understand how she really felt, but equally afraid that he wouldn't like what he found. He knew they needed to talk, that there was an undercurrent simmering away between them that wouldn't simply go away. However, any prior attempt he'd made to raise the issue had been brushed off. Buoyed by her smile, he hesitated, "Felicity, about what happened in New York-"

Automatically, she tensed, her hands tightening around his lapels. "Nothing happened."

"Yes, something did and we need to talk about it," he contradicted. She refused to look at him but he forged ahead regardless. "Kim is an old friend and there's nothing going on between us."

"Oliver, you don't have to explain this to me." Her hands dropped away from him, her body starting to turn away, but he held her still, his fingers on her shoulders gentle, but firm.

" _I do_." He hated that he couldn't read her expression. "The way you stormed out of there, tells me that I do."

"I shouldn't have done that."

"Why did you?" he probed, unable to stop himself. Without thinking, his thumbs brushed against the sides of her neck and she trembled. Surprised, yet encouraged by her reaction, he tentatively moved a step closer. "Why, Felicity?"

"Oliver," she said, her voice low, her eyes refusing to meet his. "It was nothing."

He shook his head doggedly. "I don't believe that. Tell me why." She remained silent. He almost smiled. She could be quite stubborn when she wanted to be. "Felicity," he persisted.

"I-," she began, forced to look at him. Her eyes widened when his hands moved to cup her cheeks. Her face flushed and he watched, fascinated as the rosy colour swept upward, laying siege to her neck before moving further still to stain her cheeks.  _She's beautiful._

Instinctively he glanced down and noticed her pulse beating rapidly at the base of her throat. His own leapt in response. This wasn't a good idea. He knew he should back away and let her be. Instead, he stepped even closer and her head tilted backwards automatically. His heated gaze collided with hers with an intensity that made her gasp and in their depths, he saw an answering flame. Desire unfurled in his belly and spread through him like wildfire.  _She wanted him_. "Tell me."

She licked her lips and his breath hitched in his throat. "I-I've told you before, you've been like a different person over the last few weeks. A better person," she added softly. "When I saw you with Kim I thought that maybe the change had merely been a figment of my imagination; not at all real." Her hands reached up to touch his elbows, weakly attempting to shake off his touch, but he held fast.

"Did my relationship with Sara affect you?"

"W-What?" She looked like a deer caught in the headlights.

One hand lifted, the backs of his fingers faintly tracing a path along the line of her jaw. Her eyes darkened to the deepest shade of blue he'd ever seen. "Did my relationship with Sara affect you?" he reiterated patiently.

"No," she denied shakily and entirely too quickly.

"I don't believe you," he replied softly, his eyes magnetically drawn to her plump lower lip, currently caught between her teeth. The sight was nearly his undoing. He felt his head descend.

"Oliver," she whispered, swaying towards him as though hypnotised.

Her breathing was shallow, her chest rising and falling at irregular intervals. She wanted the kiss as much as he did, he'd bet his life on it. The warmth of her sweet breath wafted up through her parted lips towards him, inviting him to sample their worth. Her hands, curled around his forearms, drew him even closer. He didn't need any more encouragement.

And yet he hesitated.

He'd never know what caused his lips to hover above hers without reaching down to claim them, except for the piercing thought that the consequences of giving in to his strongest desire could be the one thing that ruined any chance he'd ever have with her. Felicity thought him a changed man. Would ravishing her in his office not prove that he wasn't? That was the very thing the old Oliver would do and hard as it was, he didn't want to be that man anymore. He'd promised her respect and autonomy and there he was, a hairsbreadth away from taking those very things away from her once again. He was determined; if she came to him, if she  _chose_  him, it would be willingly, with clarity of mind and soul and not as a consequence of a skilled seduction. The truth was, she might succumb, but afterward she'd hate herself and he'd be responsible for that.

Looking down into her perfect face, flushed with wanting, eyes closed in anticipation, leaned forward and touched his lips gently to her forehead. He heard her surprised gasp as his lips lingered before pulling back. He saw the confusion in her eyes, the protracted hint of longing. With a sigh of regret, he stepped back.

"I should probably make some calls."

Blinking rapidly at the complete turnabout, Felicity rubbed her hands over her bare arms as though warding off a chill. "O-Of course. I'll give you some privacy." Without looking at him she marched out of the door and past her desk.

Running a frustrated hand across his face, he watched as she disappeared from sight. Clearly he wasn't the only one who needed a few moments to regain his composure.

* * *

 

Felicity was an emotional mess. The incident in Oliver's office had her standing at the basin in the ladies bathroom on shaky legs, her conscience wracked with guilt. She'd wanted him to kiss her, wanted so badly to know what that felt like. She'd certainly wondered about it enough times. Leaning against the sanitary bowl for support, she stared at her blushing reflection in the mirror, more than a little ashamed about being in a relationship with one man and craving the touch of another.

Clearly she still cared deeply about Oliver. There. She'd admitted it. She'd never moved on, despite her valiant efforts. Perhaps if he'd remained the same as he'd always been, she might have successfully buried those feelings and never looked back. But lately he'd crept back into her heart, little by little until she wasn't sure if he'd ever left. She squeezed her eyes shut, her mind recalling in vivid detail the feel of his hands on her face, his breath mingling with hers.  _Dammit._  She'd wanted him. She still did.

She'd wondered countless times about how Oliver felt about her. Today, finally, she was sure she knew the answer. He cared. And not just as a friend. She'd seen the way he'd looked at her, recognized that it was probably the same way she'd been looking at him. Unsteadily, she opened the tap and let the cool water run over her hands before lifting them to dampen her heated cheeks. The idea that he might actually return her feelings scared her. It was one thing to dream about someone when you'd convinced yourself that it was only a silly fantasy and quite another to be confronted with the idea of it actually becoming a reality.

Whatever the cause, he'd turned himself around and he'd consistently proven that he was capable of maintaining it. Could she close the door on someone who affected her the way Oliver did? The way he always had? Could she ever be happy knowing that there'd been a chance for them and she'd walked away, too afraid to try? More importantly, because of how she felt about Oliver, would Adam be a compromise? Just thinking it made her feel like a horrible person, her insides twisting agonisingly. What woman in her right mind would turn away from what Adam had to offer? She'd be crazy. But then again, love wasn't a rational emotion and sometimes it meant going against the grain, doing things that others couldn't or wouldn't understand.

After all these months, Fate was driving her steadily towards a fork in the road. At the end of each one was a man she knew in her heart she could love, but choosing either one of them didn't come without its own set of sacrifices. Coupled with that was the knowledge that she'd be hurting someone she deeply cared for. That, more than anything else, filled her with the most heart wrenching agony.

Grabbing some paper towel from the dispenser, she dried her hands, smoothed her ponytail back into place and took a deep breath before heading out. Rounding the corner to her desk, a scrolling headline on one of the large TV monitors caught her eye.

PEREZ CASE TAKES A SHOCKING TURN.

Her stomach dropped to the floor. Something terrible must have happened. Filled with trepidation, she hastened to her workstation and grabbed her handbag. All her troubles momentarily faded to the background as the headline kept flashing through her mind. There would be time to sort out her feelings for Oliver, but right now, she needed to see Adam.

 _Adam._  The right thing to do would be to tell him the truth about how she was feeling, but what would she say? How could she possibly explain something she didn't understand herself? Exhaling sharply she headed towards the lifts.

* * *

 

The courtroom downtown was quiet when she arrived. Perez must have left already and taken the media circus with him. Rushing through the entryway, she dodged a few people as her eyes darted around, looking for some sign of Adam. Recognising one of his colleagues at the end of a corridor, she accelerated towards him.

"Is the DA still here?" she asked without preamble.

Looking glum, he nodded and gestured to a door to his left. With a grateful smile, she walked through and into a large court room. It was completely empty except for a lone man sitting in a chair right at the front. Even with his back to her, Felicity could tell that Adam was upset. His shoulders were hunched forward, defeat palpable in every line of his body.

"Adam?" she called tentatively.

He turned to look at her and she rushed forward, taking a seat beside him. He looked shocked, as though he'd witnessed something unbelievable. "I saw the headlines at the office and came right over. What happened?" she asked, half afraid to know.

He raked a hand through his hair, frustration evident in every movement. "He got off."


	25. Chapter 25

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Olicity fans can read up to Chapter 27.  
> Alicity fans can skip Chapters 25, 26 and 27 and continue reading from Chapter 28-30.

 

"How?"

Adam's gaze met hers, his eyes filled with anger and disbelief. "The judge dismissed it. Said there wasn't enough credible evidence to take the matter to trial."

"What?" Felicity's heart was pounding so fast she was afraid he'd hear it. "I don't understand. You said it was open and shut." Had she missed something?

He tugged at the knot of his tie in irritation. Pulling it loose, he sighed. "It was but the judge didn't think so."

Tentatively, her stomach in tangles, she asked the one thing she was dying to know. "Was it because of the Arrow's help?"

Adam gave a humourless laugh. "Ironically, no. Turns out that our resident vigilante didn't sabotage my case at all."

Felicity swallowed her relief. "Then what was it?" 

"Perez bought the judge. Five minutes in it became obvious that he would never see the inside of a jail cell."

She wished that she was more surprised, but working with Oliver had opened her eyes to a lot of things. "Adam, I'm so sorry." She genuinely felt badly for him.

Flicking his wrist at the piles of paperwork on the table, he continued, "I can't believe that all our work, the hours and hours we've dedicated to this case, down the drain with one pound of the gavel. Apparently corruption and greed is not only confined to large corporations and dirty cops. It reaches higher still, into the realm of learned men and women who should know better, who should be setting the examples."

Felicity had never seen him this upset before and she could well understand why. Adam was a man of conviction, honorable and moral to the core, he expected others to exhibit the same values. It had to be a serious blow to realize that the very principles he believed in were not shared throughout his discipline. "I can't imagine how you must be feeling." Those words, wholly inadequate, were the only ones that came to mind.

He closed his eyes and leaned his forehead against the palms of his hands. "You should have seen it, Felicity. All our arguments shot down without so much as a fair hearing. Every piece of evidence refuted, made light of, alternate theories posed that ranged from the ridiculous right down to the truly absurd."

"Is there nothing you can do?"

He sat up, shaking his head. "You know, I wasn't naïve enough to think that corruption didn't exist, I know it does. I just didn't expect it from someone I know as well as Judge Thompson. I've seen him on the job, worked beside him many times and seen firsthand how tough he is behind the bench." He raked a hand through his hair in frustration. "How did that change?"

"I guess sometimes people find themselves going down a path they never thought they would and before they know it, they can't get back out," she answered softly. "Perez doesn't strike me as a forgiving man."

"Does that mean that everyone has a price; anyone can be bought?" he asked heatedly, directing his anger towards himself. "Does it mean that even I, with all my lofty ideals about integrity and upholding the principles and ethics of our justice system, will waiver if I saw enough zeros?"

"No," Felicity denied vehemently. A man like Adam wouldn't be swayed by money. He was too decent for that. If all he wanted was riches, he wouldn't have settled for a job in the public sector.

"Why not?" he countered.

"Because of who you are, because of the life choices you've made. In your spare time, you place children in happy homes, Adam. That doesn't strike me as a man with questionable values. If you wanted a more glamourous existence, you could've had it, easily, and yet here you are, content to slave away as a civil servant," she pointed out rationally. "You are an amazing attorney and this isn't your fault. You can't throw in the towel now. If you did, there would be one less person fighting for the right team. This city and the people in it need you, someone they can count on, even if they don't know it. Please don't give up on them."

Adam gave her a sad smile, his hand lifting to cup her cheek. Instantly, she was reminded of her earlier encounter with Oliver and how  _his_  hand had felt caressing her skin. Thankfully Adam didn't seem to notice her cheeks growing warmer. "I don't know, Felicity. I don't think I know anything anymore." With that crestfallen statement, he stood and gathered his files and folders.

Her heart aching for him, she reached forward to help. "So…does this change your opinion about the vigilante and his way of achieving justice?" she asked hopefully.

His response came swift and without hesitation, his words ringing with conviction. "No. You can't fight one type of crime by perpetuating another. What's good for one should be good for all. If what the Arrow does is acceptable, then that gives other law breakers a free pass too. Why have rules if it's okay for some to break them, but not for others? I just can't accept that."

Felicity's heart sank to the floor as she absorbed the undeniable truth. Adam would never understand what Oliver was trying to achieve, never be able to see the other side of the coin. He certainly tolerated the Arrow's presence in Starling City, was able to acknowledge that he did good work, but ultimately the manner in which he went about doing so was something Adam would never be able to accept. It strayed too far from his own beliefs about how justice should be attained and how everyone should be treated fairly, with no exceptions. The truth was, if he knew of her involvement, he'd never forgive her. So ultimately, being with Adam would mean turning her back on Oliver and his cause. More importantly, it would mean walking away from being a part of something that was incredibly vital to who she was and what she believed in. She'd never ask Adam to change who he was for her and she was sure that he'd never expect that from her either. "Do you want some company?"

"Thank you, but no." His smile was pinched. "I'd like a little time to regroup, if you don't mind?" He turned towards her and grabbed her hands in his.

Truth be told, she felt a little relieved. She needed to think and while she wanted to be sure that he was alright, it was probably best that she gave him some space. In fact, she needed some too. Reaching up on her toes and kissed his cheek. "I understand. You'll call me if you need anything?" she insisted.

He nodded obediently. "Promise." Gathering her against him, he gave her a hug. "Thank you for coming. It means a lot."

"You're welcome." With an encouraging smile in his direction, she stepped around him and exited the court room.

Whoever had said that you could have everything in life had clearly never been in her predicament.

* * *

"You seem distracted," Sara said. "That's the third time I've knocked you down…and I wasn't even trying."

Oliver looked up from his vantage point on the floor. She was right, he was distracted. Usually he didn't find himself flat on his back more than once, if at all, when they sparred. Flopping down beside him, she extended a hand towards him and pulled him into a sitting position. "Sorry," he said.

"What's going on?" she asked, wiping a bead of sweat off her forehead.

Oliver looked at her, not at all sure she'd appreciate knowing the truth. "Nothing to worry about."

She raised an eyebrow. "Ollie, spit it out."

"Sara, I don't want to hurt you."

"Felicity," she replied knowingly. There was no reproach in her voice.

Taken aback, he asked, "How did you know that?"

Rolling her eyes, Sara grabbed the bottle of water beside her and took a swig. "I'm not blind. I could see this coming a mile off and never understood why neither of you could."

"I didn't break up with you-"

Lifting a hand she halted him. "I never thought you did."

Relieved, he accepted the bottle she offered him and drank deeply.

"You love her," she stated bluntly.

Oliver sputtered and coughed. "No subtlety, I see."

She laughed. "You know me, that's not my style. I cut to the chase." She watched him. "Well?"

"I don't know what you want me to say," he responded frankly.

"I want you to tell me the truth."

He sighed. He had never been good at keeping things from Sara. She knew him too well. "Yes," he admitted, looking her straight in the eye. "I do love her." A little uncomfortable, he attempted to explain, "Sara-"

"No, no. Please don't apologise," she assured him, touching his arm. "I meant it when I said that I wanted us to be friends and as your friend, I also want you to be happy. My feelings aren't hurt. " She smiled. "Have you told her how you feel?"

He shook his head. "She's dating someone else. It's not right that I ruin that for her. Not after all I've put her through." Felicity deserved to be happy and if that wasn't with him, as much as it hurt, he'd learn to make peace with it.

Sara was looking at him strangely. "You've changed."

Feeling self-conscious, he shrugged, not commenting.

"The old Ollie would have taken what he wanted and not cared about the people standing in his way."

He felt ashamed to hear her say that. "Maybe that's not how I want to be anymore."

"I'm glad," she replied, softly. "You know, if I met someone who made me want to be a better person and became the catalyst that drove me towards that goal, I wouldn't let him go."

"I don't have a choice, Sara," Oliver said with resignation.

She huffed. "Since when? I'm not telling you to steal her away, I'm telling you to let her know she's got options."

Annoyed, he replied. "It's not that simple."

"You're afraid," she said, her eyes widening with discovery.

"I don't know what you mean," he deflected. Her words struck at his core.

Sara sat on her haunches, studying him. "You  _are_. You're afraid that she won't reciprocate."

Oliver was silent for a moment. "Well, what if she doesn't? It would just make things incredibly awkward."

"Knowing is  _always_  better than wondering and telling someone how you truly feel about them can never be wrong, not when your intentions are good."

"I don't want to tell her something she'd rather not hear." There was no way he ever wanted to be accused of being selfish again.

She brushed a wet bang out of her face. "You know, Felicity is a big girl and she can make her own decisions. If she doesn't feel the same way, then it'll be okay. But not saying anything because you think you'll be doing her a favour, isn't chivalrous Ollie, it's cowardly."

He was about to respond when Roy halted halfway down the stairs. "Sara, Thea's looking for you."

"Coming," she called. Focusing on Oliver again, she smiled. "Think about it." Patting his hand, she grabbed her water bottle and jogged towards the stairs.

Maybe Sara was right. Maybe he was afraid. All his life, he'd always been sure of his abilities with women. He knew how to handle them, how they responded to him. He could have anyone he wanted. It wasn't conceit, just fact. But with Felicity, he was never sure about anything. One moment he was certain she cared and then the next he was back to second guessing himself. He didn't fear rejection, he'd been dumped before, but never by anyone he felt this strongly about, that he wanted as much. So yes, the thought of placing himself in a position where she might rebuff him, was frightening.

Standing, he walked over to his exercise equipment. Could he start a fight he wasn't sure he could win? Was he brave enough?

* * *

Walking into the foundry, Felicity found Oliver hanging from his salmon ladder, the sight of his sweat socked, muscular back stopping her in her tracks. He hadn't seen her yet, which gave her a moment to observe him unnoticed. It wasn't as though she hadn't seen him doing the same thing a million times before. In fact, it was one of his favourite pastimes. The difference was that she was finally looking at him with her filters removed, through the eyes of a woman who was no longer in denial about how he made her feel; how  _she_  felt about  _him_. Without her walls to hide behind, it was like the floodgates had opened, and everything she'd ever felt for him came rushing to the fore. The anticipation of seeing him, the joy at being near him, the heat that overwhelmed her when he looked at her in a particular way, the rush and thrill of excitement when they shared a victory. It was there now, so many memories. She accepted that it had always been there, buried deeply beneath her hurt and disappointment. But as Oliver had attempted to make amends, slowly showing her that he could be the man she'd always believed him capable of being, it had become increasingly harder to remain indifferent.

In some ways it was a relief to admit it to herself, to not constantly have to pretend that his nearness didn't affect her. Conversely, it was hard too. She cared about Adam and she didn't want to hurt him. Harder still was the growing feeling that what she felt for Oliver could not be rivaled by anyone. So much of who she now was was because of him and the trust he'd shown her by bringing her into his secret life. He'd made her a part of something bigger, the impact of which was so much greater than she could have ever imagined and the rewards infinitely more fulfilling. No one had ever done anything like that for her.

With a grunt, propelled himself upward still, just hanging there for a moment, the muscles of his back tense and coiled. He had a beautiful body. There were many times when she'd been unable to stop herself from watching him, not even caring that she wasn't being particularly discreet about it. Then later, she'd grown to resent his physicality and her weakness to it. Shutting off that side of her, she'd stopped paying attention to him, preferring to keep her mind concentrated on work. Staring at him now, she wondered how she'd ever managed to do that.

Swallowing her sudden attack of nerves, she forced herself forward. "Hey," she called, walking past him.

She saw him glance down before she heard him making his descent. Her stomach erupted with butterflies when his feet touched the ground. "How's Adam? I saw some reports on the news."

Turning, she forced herself to stay focused on his face. It was particularly challenging when confronted with his perfect physique, his abdominal muscles rippling as he reached for a towel to mop up some sweat. "Not too good, I'm afraid. He's taken the news really badly."

Oliver nodded, his eyes locking with hers. She could feel the heat creeping up her neck.  _Is it hot in here?_  "What happened?"

She relayed the story and watched as his jaw tightened in anger. "So, in the end there wasn't much he could do," she finished.

"We need to go after the judge."

Felicity nodded, a surge of familiar adrenalin shooting through her. "I was thinking the same thing." He would not get away with it. "Although Adam's chance at prosecuting Perez may be gone forever."

Oliver hooked the towel around his neck and Felicity tried extra hard to keep her gaze from wondering across his exposed torso. "Not if I can help it."

He was starting at her. Instantly her thoughts strayed into dangerous territory as silence stretched between them. She watched, fascinated, as a trickle of moisture ran down the side of his neck, racing across his toned chest, down towards… He cleared his throat and she hopped, breaking the unexpected tension. His voice oddly strained he asked, "Would you mind starting to look into it?" Throwing the towel into a nearby basket, he reached for his shirt. Disappointed, she watched his beautiful body disappearing. "I want to know what Perez has on the judge."

Mentally shaking herself, Felicity agreed, turning to log onto her machine. This was what she enjoyed; the excitement of information gathering, the opportunities to use her skills to help someone else. Hearing Oliver's departing footsteps, she turned and called, "Thank you."

He smiled and shrugged. "It's what we do, Felicity."

Oliver was right. That was what they did. They stopped bad people from destroying innocent lives and they were darned good at it.  _She_  was good at it. The thrill of the chase, being creative and inventive in the ways she solved problems, attained or even destroyed information, was what she loved about working for Team Arrow. She'd even enjoyed the few occasions she'd been out in the field. Terrifying as it might have been at times, she was proud of herself for having done it. Her day job at QC just didn't compare. In contrast, it was mundane and predictable. She couldn't go back to that.

Diggle had mentioned choosing himself over a relationship with Carly because they'd wanted different things. Perhaps the same was true for her and Adam. She cared about him, she could even love him if she truly allowed herself to, but what she wanted and needed in her life were things that he would never be able to accept. Ultimately, giving them up wasn't something she wanted to do, at least not yet; she wasn't ready. Continuing to lie to him about the fundamental things in her life wasn't right either. Adam deserved better than that. He was a good man and if she was a different woman, she'd have no doubts that he'd be able to make her very happy. But committing fully to him would mean sacrificing who she was and what she believed was right. She couldn't do that. Similarly, expecting him to understand and accept her point of view would be asking him to sacrifice the principles he lived by. That wouldn't be fair either.

Sad, but resolute, she stared at her screen, her fingers poised above the keys, knowing what she needed to do.

She had to break things off with Adam.


	26. Chapter 26

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Olicity fans can read up to Chapter 27.  
> Alicity fans can skip Chapters 25, 26 and 27 and continue reading from Chapter 28-30.

 

Felicity decided that sooner rather than later was better when breaking up with someone, hard and unpleasant as it may be. Perhaps more important than that was the fact that she respected Adam tremendously and as a result, she didn't want to drag her feet. Since he'd invited her over for dinner the following evening, she resolved to do the right thing and tell him. The timing couldn't have been worse considering his recent professional let down, but if she waited for a better opportunity, it may never arrive.

Nervous because she dreaded what lay ahead, she smoothed her hands over her dress and took a deep breath before knocking on the door. Adam was there instantly, looking handsome dressed down in jeans and a sweater, and she wondered, not for the first time, why she couldn't have just fallen head over heels for him instead. "There you are," he said, reaching for her hand and propelling her across the threshold. Immediately her senses were invaded by a plethora of delicious aromas.

"You seem better," she observed as he helped her out of her coat.

Giving her a grin, he hung it on the hook beside the door. "I knew I was seeing you and that makes everything better."

Guilt assailed her at his words. Why did he have to be so darned wonderful? "Something smells good," she remarked, trying for the moment to sidestep the inevitable conclusion to the evening.

Walking deeper into the room, she saw the table he'd set up close to the fire and her conscience prickled once more. He'd obviously gone to so much trouble in order to please her. Felicity couldn't stand there and pretend that everything was okay when she knew it wasn't. How could she go through an entire dinner observing all the pains he'd gone through, all the while knowing that she was going to be hurting him before the night was over? "Adam, we need to talk."

He must have picked up on the seriousness of her tone because he immediately stopped what he was doing and looked at her. "Are you okay?" Switching off the stove, he placed an arm around her shoulders and steered her towards the sofa they'd spent a considerable amount of time getting to know one another on. The memories were now bittersweet.

"There's something I have to tell you." He sat down opposite her, his face all concern.

Touching her forehead with one hand, he ran the fingers of the other across her cheeks and neck. "You're worrying me. Are you ill?"

She grabbed his hands gently, stilling them. "No," she said softly. "I'm not ill. But there is something important I need for you to know."

Frowning slightly, he replied, "Okay."

Where did she start? Mustering all her courage, she decided to be as forthright as she could. "We've been seeing each other for a while now and I want you to know that it's been one of the best times of my life. You're so wonderful and-"

Adam shifted, sitting forward. "It sounds like you're breaking up with me," he teased, his grin wide and infectious. When she didn't refute him, the smile slowly faded. "Wait a minute.  _You're breaking up with me?_ " It was a whisper of disbelief.

His incredulity and confusion made her want to cry. This was even harder than she'd imagined it would be. "Adam, I'm sorry. There's just so much you don't know, don't understand." Felicity reached for his hand, but he pulled it away. The gesture hurt her, even though she understood it.

"Then explain it to me," he replied, earnestly. "We were happy a few days ago, or at least I was. What's changed?"

She tried to speak, but the words were hard in coming. "I wish I could explain properly."

"Is there someone else?" Adam asked suddenly, his voice low.

Felicity glanced at him in surprise, her gaze stricken. That must have been enough of an answer. He stood. "Adam-"

"I'll take that as an affirmative." He stood rigidly, his hands buried in his pockets.

Felicity followed him up, moving close, but not touching him. "There genuinely wasn't anyone else when we met. I did not start dating you under false pretenses. I care about you. I just didn't know that I cared about him too." Dammit, she didn't want to hurt him.

"Who is he?"

She wouldn't lie to him any more than she had to. "Oliver." His face fell and her heart broke.

"I knew something was up between you two. The night of the Gala, when you were dancing together, I thought I detected an undercurrent, but you assured me that I was wrong." His tone was hurt, accusatory.

Felicity moved forward. "I didn't lie to you. I honestly didn't know I still had feelings for Oliver. I would never have agreed to go out with you, or let our relationship develop so quickly if I'd known how I felt about him."

"Still?" he asked, dazedly. "You mean you've felt this way before?"

Swallowing back tears, she knew she'd wounded him badly. She felt like a heel. "I had a crush on him when we met, but I believed it to be over. When I met you, I wasn't thinking about Oliver at all." She reached to touch his arm, but thought better of it. "Please believe me."

He turned away, staring out at the cityscape. "Do you love him?"

Could things get any worse? "Yes," Felicity answered truthfully, watching him flinch as though she'd struck him. Slowly, she made her way to his side and focussed on the twinkling lights below, her voice trembling with emotion. "I know my timing isn't the best, but I didn't want to lie to you. Once I realized how I felt, I wanted you to be the first to know. I'm so very sorry."

Adam remained silent for a moment. "Does he love you?"

She looked down at her hands. "I don't know. But that hardly matters right now. You don't deserve someone who's not fully committed to you. It wouldn't be fair."

His head turned towards her, his expression filled with regret. "I would have made you happy."

"I know." A tear rolled down her cheek and he extended a finger to gently wipe it away.

With a sigh, he reached for her, gathering her close, his chin resting above her head. She closed her eyes, savouring their closeness one last time. Pulling back, his sad eyes raced across her face, as though he were memorizing every detail. "I hope he endeavors to deserve you."

"Thank you, Adam," she said, placing a soft kiss along his smooth jaw. He truly was a remarkable man and someday he'd make some woman incredibly happy.

That woman was unfortunately not her.

* * *

"I take it the news hasn't reached you yet," Oliver heard Diggle say as he perused some paperwork on the backseat of the company Lexus. They were en-route to the office.

Looking up, he met Diggle's eyes in the rear-view mirror. "News?"

"Felicity and Adam."

All ears, Oliver momentarily forgot the documents in front of him. "What about them?" He felt an odd feeling of dread well up inside of him.

"They broke up," the other man said casually, carefully navigating the morning traffic.

"What? When?" Oliver sat up straighter, his mind reeling.  _Broke up?_ Why didn't he know about this? "Why?"

Diggle laughed. "One question at a time, man."

Oliver tried to control his impatience. "When did this happen?"

"A couple of days ago." Could Diggle be any more vague? He'd been in New York for the last two days and only got back the previous evening. He'd talked to Felicity while he'd been away, but she hadn't mentioned anything. Then again, it wasn't the type of thing she was likely to share via telephone or email.

"Why?"

Diggle shrugged. "You'll have to ask her that."

Frustrated because he knew his friend was being deliberately unclear, he clamped down on his welling irritation. "If you're not planning on telling me anything, why did you mention it in the first place?"

Glancing at him briefly, the other man grinned. "Because I haven't failed to notice the way you can't keep your eyes off her, even if you think you're doing a good job of hiding it."

 _Crap._ If Dig was aware of it, was everyone else? "Do you ever mind your own business?" He pretended to read even tough his concentration was completely shot.

Unperturbed, Diggle continued, "And yes, everyone has noticed."  _Great, so much for my attempts at discretion._  "Except Felicity, I think."

 _Thank God_. "Is she okay?" he asked, tentatively. He didn't like it, but he knew she cared about the DA and whatever her reasons for ending the relationship, he knew it couldn't have been easy for her.

Diggle's eyes met his again. "Yeah, she's fine."

He nodded, the rest of the drive passing in silence. Felicity had broken up with Donner. He couldn't stop the feeling of elation that swept through him. What did it mean? Dared he hope? Suddenly he felt impatient to get to the office to talk to her, to see her. He wanted to establish for himself that she was genuinely okay, or if she was in reality pining away for his rival. When the car halted at the curb, he pushed the door open, intending to make a hasty exit.

"Hey, Oliver?" Diggle called.

"Yeah?"

"Don't screw this up."

Secretly, Oliver smiled. Diggle had just given him his blessing and that meant more to him than the other man would ever know. For a long time his friend, also Felicity's fiercest protector, had warned him to steer clear of her if he wasn't sure that he was ready to fully commit. The fact that Diggle had practically wished him luck, indicated that he believed Oliver was finally worthy of her. He couldn't believe that it had taken so long, but they'd finally come full circle.

Turning towards the other man, he stared him straight in the eye, a smile hovering around the corners of his mouth. "I don't intend to." Swiftly departing, Oliver entered the building and headed towards what he hoped would be his future.

* * *

Oliver found Felicity in one of the large conference venues trying out their new state of the art video conferencing facility. When he walked in, she was saying goodbye to one of their younger techies on a different floor. "I see everything's working well."

She beamed at him and his pulse skidded to a halt.  _Beautiful._ "This new system is so cool. Wait until you see what it's capable of."

Smiling, he walked further into the room. "I'm sure I'm going to be suitably impressed."

Rolling her eyes at him mockingly, she switched off the equipment. "You're technologically challenged. I don't expect you to get it."

He laughed. He'd missed her these past two days. "Everything okay here?"

She nodded, her loose hair swaying gently around her face. "How was New York?"

"Exhausting," he replied, placing a small pile of reports on the table.

"Oh!" Felicity said, leaning across the table in order to disconnect some cables, "I found some pretty interesting information on Judge Thompson that you may want to have a look at."

Trying with all his might to keep his attention focussed on what she was saying and not on the lush curves of her derriere, he fidgeted with his tie.  _Why's this thing so tight?_ He couldn't breathe properly. "Great. I was going to ask you about that. I want to move on this as quickly as possible."

She nodded. "Looks like blackmail."

Relieved when she stood up again, Oliver's breathing returned to normal. "It always is."

"You know, I almost feel sorry for Thompson. By all accounts, he was a very good judge before he became embroiled with Perez."

"Then it's unfortunate that he can't get a do-over."

"It is," she replied thoughtfully.

Hesitantly, he commented, "Adam must still be pretty upset."

He watched as a shadow passed over her face. "I err..wouldn't know." She glanced at him. "We broke up."

"Dig told me on the way over. I'm sorry," Oliver said sincerely. Despite his feeling about Felicity and Adam as a couple, he didn't rejoice in seeing her pain. "Are you okay?"

She kept busy, her eyes glued to her laptop screen. "Yeah, I'm fine. Everything's fine."

Slowly, he walked over to her and placed a hand on her shoulder to stop her. He saw her close her eyes briefly as she turned to face him. "Why?" he asked, knowing she understood his meaning perfectly.

Without her spectacles on, her eyes appeared larger and bluer than he remembered. "It wasn't going to work out. He's a great guy," Felicity said, her eyes meeting his, "but he's not the one for me." Her words caused his breath to hitch in the back of his throat. Her gaze was direct, unwavering.

"Were you in love with him?" Oliver had to know.

A blush stained her cheeks. "No," she replied softly and a weight he hadn't realised he'd been carrying around finally lifted.

He suddenly didn't care that he was staring at her, his eyes devouring every detail - the slight curl in her hair, the perfect symmetry of her face, the rose tinged hue of her skin. Silence stretched between them, each one wondering what the other was thinking, both too afraid to ask. He wanted to... No. He knew he shouldn't.

Oliver stared.

Felicity stared back.

_Screw it._

He kissed her.

Closing the distance between them, he grasped her shoulders and pulled her gently, yet firmly against him. Her gasp of surprise only served to fuel his desire, his heart racing with anticipation. His eyes affixed to hers, he lifted his hands, cupping both cheeks tenderly, holding her captive. Again, he looked at her, his eyes slowly travelling across her face, studying every contour, colour and texture. Her lips, a bright red, was like a beacon in the dark, guiding a starving man home. Hypnotised, he watched as her tongue darted out nervously to wet her lips, the sight nearly his undoing. Dipping his head, his mouth hovered, his breath mingling with the sweetness of hers. Felicity's eyes lazily drifted closed, her mouth rising just as his descended the fraction needed to fuse their lips together.

* * *

Pure sensation, hot and heavy, exploded throughout her. She felt soft and pliant in Oliver's arms, her hands clutching onto the front of his jacket for dear life. His arms, like bands of strength, circled around her waist and she moaned in gratitude. Without them for support, she would surely have fallen to the floor, her knees weak, her mind incapable of rational thought. His lips moved across hers with confidence, his tongue bold as it slipped between her lips with ease, the invasion a welcome relief. Only her relief was short-lived. Pleasure followed, heady and intoxicating as her mouth drank from his, her thirst unquenchable. Winding her arms around his neck, Felicity stood on her toes to get even closer to him, his lips lifting briefly to inhale some much needed oxygen before melding with hers again, the kiss deeper and even more drugging than the last.

Slowly, by torturous degrees, his lips finally lifted from hers, even as his arms tightened around her. Her heart thumping painfully in her chest, she tried desperately to gain control over her ragged breathing. She didn't fail to notice that Oliver wasn't having much more success at it than she was.

Feeling his finger beneath her chin, he raised her eyes to meet his. "Felicity, would you like to have dinner with me tonight?"

Her eyes widened with surprise, her cheeks flushing anew. Smiling, she replied, "I'd love to."


	27. Chapter 27

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Olicity fans can read up to Chapter 27.  
> Alicity fans can skip Chapters 25, 26 and 27 and continue reading from Chapter 28-30.

 

Oliver tugged nervously at the knot of his tie as he stared at Felicity's front door. He was nervous; a feeling he wasn't entirely used to experiencing around women. Usually he was the cool and collected one, his effortless charm the perfect go-to in any situation. As he'd come to realize lately, with Felicity it was different; every experience was new to him, every emotion a first. The truth was, she knew him too well and with her there was nowhere to hide. Interestingly enough, he wasn't even trying to anymore. He wanted her to know him, truly know him in a way he'd never allowed anyone to in a very long time. Anxiously running his hand down the front of his grey suit jacket once more, he couldn't help hoping that tonight would be the start of something he'd never dared to dream was possible.

Taking a minute to reflect, he thought about everything that had lead him to this exact moment: His decision to take Sara aboard the  _Queen's Gambit_ , the storm and the boat's ultimate demise, his father's death, the years of suffering and sacrifices he'd made, the harsh lessons he'd learned, his return to Starling City and the birth of the Arrow. Those five years away from his family, his friends, his _life_ , had been so devastating that at times he'd almost drowned in despair, but he couldn't deny that the man he now was was a result of all that hardship and struggle. He didn't have a crystal ball or a time machine, he had no way of knowing how his life would have turned out if he'd never stepped on board his family's boat that fateful night so many years ago, but one thing was certain: He would probably never have met Felicity Smoak.

Who might he have been without knowing her? Everything he'd been through had shaped him and changed him into a man who was able to see the worth in other people. Someone who was driven by the need to make a difference in the world, someone who placed the needs of others ahead of his own, someone who'd very recently leant that love was a precious gift, one that was earned and when you were lucky enough to find it, you didn't allow fear to hold you back. He was ashamed to admit that the old Oliver would most likely never have paid Felicity much attention. He'd certainly never have been interested in getting to know her. He'd been too consumed with parties, popular people, drink and generally partaking in reckless and irresponsible behaviour to care much about anyone who didn't contribute to the playboy lifestyle. In retrospect it all seemed so pointless and he couldn't even remember what the appeal had been. A life of idle wastefulness had once been his dream. Now that could not be further from his reality. What a fool he'd been and may still have been had fate not had a very different destiny in mind for him.

Subconsciously, his mind cast back to the first time he'd met Felicity. In the bowels of the IT Department at Queen Consolidated, he'd thought to pull the wool over the eyes of some young novice who'd be so eager to impress the boss that they'd help him without asking any questions. Instead, what he'd received was a somewhat quirky woman, whose brilliant mind was linked to a mouth that tended to babble adorably while her keen sense of observation pierced through his bullshit without having to openly pry. Even now, he couldn't help smiling at the image of her, head cocked to the side, a red pen caught between her bright pink lips, her gaze direct with a hint of incredulity as she listened to his ridiculous assertion that a spilled latte had been the reason he needed her help with his laptop rather than the glaring bullet holes that had littered it's surface.

That day, looking at her as she'd watched him with an expression that said, "seriously?" behind her black rimmed spectacles, he'd smiled for the first time in he couldn't remember how long.  _Genuinely smiled._  He hadn't wanted to, but her reaction to his absurd claims had been as unexpected as it had been amusing and he hadn't been able to help himself. While he couldn't have known then what she'd eventually come to mean to him, in hindsight that moment between them had been the first time since his return from the dead that the seeds of trust had been planted between him and another human being.

Buoyed by the memory, Oliver, even more eager to see her as a result of it, gently rapped his knuckles against the white wooden door. Almost instantly it gave way and Felicity,  _his Felicity_ , was standing before him. The sight of her, poised and beautiful, knocked his breath from his chest. It wasn't that he hadn't seen her looking equally striking before, he had, many times over, but tonight however, he knew that the effort she'd made was as much for her as it was for him. The thought pleased him immensely.

"Felicity," he breathed, admiring the way her red v-neck dress lovingly hugged her curves in all the right places before coming to a halt just above her knees, her legs showcased to perfection in strappy gold high heels. Instinctively, he took a step towards her, his hands reaching up to gently cradle her face, their eyes locking together. Tempted by the attraction of her crimson lips, he was unable to help himself as he leaned down and claimed a soft kiss. "You look beautiful."

Unconsciously her hands lifted and rested against his forearms, a blush sweeping up her neck and across her cheeks. "Thank you."

She smelled wonderful, like fresh vanilla and sunshine; light and feminine, and for a moment he closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, relishing her proximity to him. How had he ever thought he could suppress the myriad of emotions coursing through him as he held her against him? At that moment it seemed impossible. He stared down at her, his stomach tightening in knots.

Her eyes widened. "What?"

He shook his head. "Nothing. I'm just-"

She chuckled a little uneasily. "Nervous?"

"Yeah."

"Line forms behind me," she said, pointing a thumb over her left shoulder self-consciously.

Oliver exhaled loudly. "Am I being crazy? I mean, what do we have to be nervous about?"

"Well, we've already exhausted every topic that one would normally talk about on a first date and a second date and a third date, and every date, actually, and I've already seen you shirtless." Her eyes closed momentarily, as though she couldn't believe she'd just said that. "Multiple times... Shirtless, all the time," she finished, the shade of pink in her cheeks deepening by the second.

Equally amused and charmed, he cleared his throat. "I think you'd better get your purse while I wait here."

"Right."

He watched as she turned and disappeared behind the door. Taking a deep breath Oliver steadied his nerves. There was a lot to be said and if they stood any chance of making this relationship work, then he couldn't hold back anymore. All cards on the table. That was what Felicity deserved and if he ever hoped to be worthy of her, then he needed to lay it all on the line, regardless of the outcome.

Rejoining him, she pulled the door closed behind her. Offering her his hand, he felt a surge of pleasure when she placed hers carefully in his. "I'm ready," she whispered.

Innocuous words, but they both knew it held a much deeper meaning. Squeezing her hand, he reciprocated. "So am I."

* * *

 

Rubbing a hand across her midriff, Felicity shook her head as their waiter offered her a selection of delicious looking desserts. "No, thank you. I'm stuffed." After the amazing meal they'd just shared, she was high on the intimacy of their setting and the company of the amazing man sitting opposite her. Not someone capable of half gestures, Oliver had persuaded the restaurateur of the most exclusive eatery in town to close his doors for the night and allow them exclusive reign over the place. In the cosy, candlelit ambiance, they were completely alone save for the single waiter who discreetly popped in periodically to see to their comfort.

Satisfied, Felicity sat back and watched as Oliver chatted to the young man clearing their table. He looked relaxed and happy and she couldn't stop the hope that burgeoned at the thought that she may be the cause of it. Since she'd met him she'd seen his struggle to hold onto his emotions, always guarding them so fiercely, many times to his own detriment. But lately, it hadn't escaped her notice that he'd been trying to be more open, more tolerant and understanding of everyone in the team, most especially her. She knew he cared about her, that maybe there was something happening between them, but she was too afraid to label it.

Of course, _she_   _loved him._  Her heart squeezed painfully as she watched him smile. She'd been in love with him for so long, it was hard to pinpoint the precise moment she'd known it to be true. Meeting him had given her life a new purpose, a way out of the mundane trappings of a predictable corporate existence. Being able to fight at his side, to contribute to making their city a better place, meant more to her than she'd ever imagined it would.

The first day she'd met him, she'd been so taken aback by his unexpected appearance at her desk that she'd made a complete hash of things. Naturally she'd heard of his return, but she'd never thought to actually meet him. Then when she did, within the first five seconds she'd reminded him that his father was dead, that  _he_  wasn't and that she was probably a complete idiot. He'd caught her off guard and quite honestly, he'd been the last person she'd expected to see. Her first thought had been that blue jeans and a dark grey sweater had never looked as good and thankfully she hadn't verbalized  _that_. Luckily, her faux pas hadn't cost her her job, but had instead, started her on a strange journey that had eventually lead to her sitting across from him in an empty restaurant wondering if he could ever possibly feel about her the way she felt about him.

Engrossed in her private musings, she was startled when his gaze suddenly collided with hers. Her heart skipped a beat.

Oliver cleared his throat. "By the way, there are still a few things you don't know about me," he said, a little uncomfortably.

Sitting upright, Felicity replied, "Please. Name one."

He shifted slightly in his seat, his hand reaching to straighten his blue tie. "The five years that I was away…. I wasn't always on Lian Yu."

"I thought so." She'd always suspected there was way more to the story than Oliver let on. She'd never pushed him for answers because she'd respected his need for privacy. But he seemed to want to talk about it and if so, she was more than willing to listen. "Where were you?"

"Hong Kong, for one." His mind seemed to wander for a second. "And I have been thinking a lot recently about my time there. The choices that I had to make."

Felicity couldn't begin to imagine what he'd been through and the toll that must have taken on him. "Those years sound like they were full of a whole lot of suck."

For a minute Oliver seemed distracted, his eyes fixed on a distant mark somewhere behind her. As quickly as he'd mentally checked out, he shook himself and re-joined the present. "I'm sorry. I'm just a little out of my element." She knew that opening up didn't come naturally to him and she loved him all the more for trying. "The entire time that I was gone, I could never… completely trust someone. And when that goes on for so long, you stop seeing people for people. You see... threats. Or targets. And when I decided to come home, I-I just didn't know how to turn that part of me off." He gave her a faint smile and her heart turned over. "Then I walked into your office. You were the first person that I could see as a… a person. There was just something about you."

Touched, and a little self-conscious too, Felicity deflected humorously, "Oh, yeah, I was chewing on a pen."

"It was red," he replied, without missing a beat.

She gasped, her eyes widening in surprise. "I can't believe you remember that."

He reached across the table and grasped her hand, slowly linking their fingers. Felicity watched, fascinated as his big, tanned hand enveloped hers, his palm rough and calloused against her own smooth skin. She'd never felt anything as wonderful. "I remember everything about you."

Her stomach flipped over. "Oliver-"

He interjected, "Do you remember when I told you that because of what we do, I didn't think that I could be with someone that I…that I could really care about?"

Her heart was racing a mile a minute, the blood rushing to her ears. "Yeah, I remember."

His eyes held hers captive, soft and earnest, hope and something else, something she was too afraid to name lurking in their depths, causing her breath to catch in her throat. "So maybe I was wrong."

Felicity's fingers curled around his, their warmth seeping into her bones. Hope blossomed, big and bright, but still she held back, needing to be sure. "What exactly are you saying? Because Oliver, I don't want to misunderstand or think that you mean one thing when in reality you're actually referring to something completely different."

His throat moved, but no words came out.  _He's afraid._  Incredulous, she realised that he was uncertain of her. His hand gripped hers almost painfully, but she hardly noticed. She needed to know the truth. "Felicity, what I'm saying is that I don't want to…hide anymore. I don't want to be safe, for my emotions to be compartmentalised, for things to always be simple and easy. Sometimes life is about getting dirty. I never thought I'd ever say this, but…I want messy and I want complicated and I-I want that with you."

She closed her eyes as the words seeped through her, their meaning warming her from the inside out. She'd waited so long to hear them, dreamt of them, never believed they'd ever be uttered to her.

The reality was far superior to even her greatest dream.

Misinterpreting her silence as doubt, Oliver's voice took on an edge of panic. "I know I've been the biggest jerk around. I-I've taken you for granted and I've tried to dictate how you live your life and made decisions about your future without consulting you. But Felicity," his voice cracked, his eyes pleading. "All I've ever wanted was for you to be safe and happy. I know I've gone about it the wrong way and instead of discussing it with you I was high handed and demanding. I'm sorry-"

Her eyes filling with tears, she whispered, "Oliver-"

He didn't seem to hear her. "…about this crazy emotional rollercoaster I've had you on. It wasn't fair and my only defence is my own fear. Fear of someone actually seeing me for who I am, knowing about all of the things I've done and running hysterically in the opposite direction. I guess it was just easier to keep things simple – casual relationships with women who needed me more than I needed them. That way, there was no chance of me ever becoming emotionally involved." He was staring down at their linked hands, his thumbs lovingly stoking the backs of hers. "Those five years messed me up, Felicity. They made me distrustful and vengeful and angry and…blind." His eyes rose slowly to meet hers and her heart slammed against her ribs at the raw emotion she saw in them. His eyes glazed with moisture, not even trying to hide his vulnerability. This was the Oliver she'd only rarely seen glimpses of, the man she loved with all her heart and soul. A lone tear slid down her cheek. "That blind stupidity and stubbornness almost made me lose sight of the most important thing in my life, the most important person." He rose from his chair and moved around the table to kneel beside her. Even if she'd wanted to speak, at that moment, she was incapable of uttering a word. "You see, unlike those meaningless relationships I thought I wanted, where I was the one that everyone else depended on, I realise that now I'm the one that's dependent on you. Not in a way that makes me weak, but in a way that makes me strong. _I need you_. You, Felicity Smoak, _I love you_."

When he finally said the words Felicity realised that they'd never really been important. She'd known it all along, she'd just been too afraid to believe it. He'd shown her, in a hundred different ways over the last few months, proved it to her time and again. Even letting her go, thinking that she wanted to be with Adam was testament to how deeply he loved her. Only Oliver would sacrifice his own happiness for the people he cared about. It was one of his most endearing and also most frustrating traits.

"I'm not expecting you to say it back, or even to feel it. I'm just asking for a chance to prove to you that I'm worthy of you. The fact that you're here tells me that you can't think me a total lost cause, right?" His attempt at humour while rendering himself completely vulnerable to her rejection struck her at her core. Gone was the charm, the self-assurance, the pride. The Oliver Queen she knew protected himself against any and all emotional ties, his armour seemingly impenetrable. Yet here he was, on his knees before her, open and exposed.  _For me. He's doing it for me._

With a sob, Felicity launched herself at him, pulling him upright as her arms encircled his neck, her lips crashing down on his. She knew she'd caught him by surprise, but he recovered quickly, his arms enveloping her in an embrace that she hoped would never end, his lips crushing hers in a kiss that promised to set them both alight. Greedy and demanding his lips clung to hers desperately, his tongue plunging deep into the moist cavern of her mouth, his hands moving up to hold her head hostage. Her hands roamed restlessly across his shoulders, drawing him closer to her, enjoying the heat of his body as it permeated hers. Her lips would be bruised in the morning, but she didn't care. Not when she'd waited a lifetime for this moment.

Then, as frantic as the kiss had started, it changed, became softer, deeper, more intimate. His hands changed position, cupping the back of her head tenderly as his lips melted against hers. She moaned. Or he moaned. She couldn't be sure. Perhaps it was both of them. All she knew what that her body was on fire and the only one capable of extinguishing it was the very man responsible for the inferno. Her stomach, already a riot of butterflies, exploded with feeling as she felt one of his hands wander down her back and around the curve of her hip. Grasping his shoulders tighter, she pushed closer, unable to believe that he was finally hers - to touch, to kiss, to  _love._

His breathing ragged, she whimpered when Oliver lifted his lips from hers. "Wait. Does this mean…?"

Felicity laughed, lightheaded and deliriously happy. "Yes," she confirmed, punctuating her words with sweet kisses. "I love you, Oliver. I've loved you for so long."

He closed his eyes savouring the words. "I'm sorry for being such a fool."

She shook her head. The time for apologies was over. They needed to look to the future. "What matters is that you've more than made up for it," she smiled.

"Felicity, there is so much you don't know, so many things-"

She placed a finger against his lips to silence him. "I know. I know there are things that you'll tell me that will be shocking and painful and perhaps even a little scary." She felt him tense against her. "But nothing would ever make me love you less." Her eyes remained focused on his. " _I love you_. I love who you are and every experience you've been through, good and bad, have contributed to you being you. So while I can't take away all the horrible things that happened to you, I want you to know that I'll always be here to listen, without judgement or censure. You're not alone anymore. You don't have to carry the weight of the world on these remarkably broad shoulders." She ran her hands possessively across them for emphasis.  _Mine._  His relief was tangible as he gathered her against him, their laughter mingling softly. "I'm here, Oliver, and I'm not going anywhere."

Lifting her off her feet, he turned them in a slow circle. "Have I ever told you that you're remarkable?"

She pretended to think. "A time or two. But a girl never gets tired of hearing it."

"Then I'll be sure to remind you often," he promised as he leisurely set her back down, just as Andrew Belle's soft, raspy voice started singing the opening line to  _In My Veins_. Felicity reared back to look at him, but his eyes registered equal surprise.

Impressed, she nodded. "Now this is service."

Smiling down at her, he adjusted his hold. "May I?"

Melting into his arms, Oliver brushed a stray bang behind her ear. "Dig's going to go crazy."

Felicity laughed. "Yes, he most certainly is."

"I owe him so much. If it wasn't for him, I don't know if I'd be standing here right now."

"Thank God for Dig," she teased, snuggling against the front of his suit jacket.

Lifting her chin to look at her, he lowered his lips to hers once more. "I promise you'll never regret this _. I love you, Felicity_."

Looking into his eyes, she realised that it didn't matter how they'd gotten there, only that they eventually had. "I know."

Sighing contentedly, her eyes fell closed as her lips joined with his. It had been a long and sometimes painful journey, but finally they were together and deep down she knew with certainty that from that day forward, they would never be apart again.

_Oh, you're in my veins and I cannot get you out…._

**END**


	28. Chapter 28

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapters 28-30 is the alternate Alicity ending. This leads on from chapter 24.

"How?"

Adam's gaze met hers, his eyes filled with anger and disbelief. "The judge dismissed it. Said there wasn't enough credible evidence to take the matter to trial."

"What?" Felicity's heart was pounding so fast she was afraid he'd hear it. "I don't understand. You said it was open and shut." Had she missed something?

He tugged at the knot of his tie in irritation. Pulling it loose, he sighed. "It was but the judge didn't think so."

Tentatively, her stomach in tangles, she asked the one thing she was dying to know. "Was it because of the Arrow's help?"

Adam gave a humourless laugh. "Ironically, no. Turns out that our resident vigilante didn't sabotage my case at all."

Felicity swallowed her relief. "Then what was it?" 

"Perez bought the judge. Five minutes in it became obvious that he would never see the inside of a jail cell."

She wished that she was more surprised, but working with Oliver had opened her eyes to a lot of things. "Adam, I'm so sorry." She genuinely felt badly for him.

Flicking his wrist at the piles of paperwork on the table, he continued, "I can't believe that all our work, the hours and hours we've dedicated to this case, down the drain with one pound of the gavel. Apparently corruption and greed is not only confined to large corporations and dirty cops. It reaches higher still, into the realm of learned men and women who should know better, who should be setting the examples."

Felicity had never seen him this upset before and she could well understand why. Adam was a man of conviction, honorable and moral to the core, he expected others to exhibit the same values. It had to be a serious blow to realize that the very principles he believed in were not shared throughout his discipline. "I can't imagine how you must be feeling." Those words, wholly inadequate, were the only ones that came to mind.

He closed his eyes and leaned his forehead against the palms of his hands. "You should have seen it, Felicity. All our arguments shot down without so much as a fair hearing. Every piece of evidence refuted, made light of, alternate theories posed that ranged from the ridiculous right down to the truly absurd."

"Is there nothing you can do?"

He sat up, shaking his head. "You know, I wasn't naïve enough to think that corruption didn't exist, I know it does. I just didn't expect it from someone I know as well as Judge Thompson. I've seen him on the job, worked beside him many times and seen firsthand how tough he is behind the bench." He raked a hand through his hair in frustration. "How did that change?"

"I guess sometimes people find themselves going down a path they never thought they would and before they know it, they can't get back out," she answered softly. "Perez doesn't strike me as a forgiving man."

"Does that mean that everyone has a price; anyone can be bought?" he asked heatedly, directing his anger towards himself. "Does it mean that even I, with all my lofty ideals about integrity and upholding the principles and ethics of our justice system, will waiver if I saw enough zeros?"

"No," Felicity denied vehemently. A man like Adam wouldn't be swayed by money. He was too decent for that. If all he wanted was riches, he wouldn't have settled for a job in the public sector.

"Why not?" he countered. He was looking at her strangely again before suddenly changing tack. "Do you think the Arrow could be bought?"

Felicity's stomach dropped to the floor. "What?"

"The Arrow. This city's masked avenger. Do you think he is corruptible?" His eyes bored holes into hers.

Swallowing in an attempt to moisten her dry throat, she forced herself to remain calm.  _Does he know about Oliver?_ "I can't speak for him." Was she imagining the flicker of disappointment she saw in Adam's eyes? Hastily, she continued, "But I know you. In your spare time, you place children in happy homes, Adam. That doesn't strike me as a man with questionable values. If you wanted a more glamourous existence, you could've had it, easily, and yet here you are, content to slave away as a civil servant. You are an amazing attorney and this isn't your fault. You can't throw in the towel now. If you did, there would be one less person fighting for the right team. This city and the people in it need you, someone they can count on, even if they don't know it. Please don't give up on them."

He gave her a sad smile, his hand lifting to cup her cheek. This time she didn't miss the disappointment evident behind those intelligent eyes. Startled, she realized it was directed at her. "I don't know, Felicity. I don't think I know anything anymore." With that crestfallen and somewhat loaded statement, he stood and gathered his files and folders.

Her heart aching for him, she reached forward to help, trying to quell the alarm she could feel threatening to overwhelm her. "Adam, have I done something to upset you?" she asked carefully.

He stopped what he was doing and faced her. "Stop, Felicity. I know."

Dread enveloping her, she prevaricated. "Know what?"

"I  _know_. That you work for him. The Arrow."

"Adam-"

He held up a hand. "Don't lie to me anymore. Please. No more lies."

Swallowing the lump in her throat, she nodded. "How long have you known?"

He closed his eyes, her confirmation clearly hurting him. "Not long. I figured it out on my own though. Initially I just thought you were an incredibly dedicated employee, but when your late nights, supposedly working, always happened to coincide with a vigilante take-down, I started putting the pieces together."

Her mind was racing. There was so much she wanted to tell him, to explain, but she couldn't. More than anything, she wished she could erase the look of betrayal on his face. "I wanted to tell you, a thousand times," she attempted, knowing it sounded feeble.

"Then why didn't you?" His eyes were pleading.

"I couldn't. It wasn't my secret to tell. Adam, please try to understand-"

He turned away from her and continued packing. "I don't buy that, Felicity. You  _knew_ ," he said accusingly. "You knew how I felt about honesty and yet you continued to lie to me, time after time." He wasn't looking at her and she didn't know which was worse – seeing his disappointment head on, or knowing that despite his anger, he was still trying to shield her from it. Adam was always looking out for everyone else, even when it cost him. His reluctance to blast her with the brunt of his upset touched something deep inside of her. Even though he didn't have all the facts, in his shoes, she'd probably be ranting and raving and yet there he was, trying his best to spare her – even though she may have deserved at least _some_  of his ire.

It was at that moment that she realized that she loved him. How could she not? From the moment they'd met he'd gone out of his way to make her feel special, wanted, cherished, appreciated. Everything she'd ever wanted. Was it possible to love two men at the same time? In different ways? For different reasons?

She reached out to touch him but he side-stepped. His rejection stung. Tears pricked behind her lids. "I know you're angry and you probably think that I should have told you who he was, but you have to try and see things from my side."

Adam snapped his briefcase shut and turned to face her, his voice filled with regret. "You don't get it. I told you once before, I don't care  _who he is_  provided he stays out of my way. That isn't the issue. I'm disappointed because  _you didn't tell me you work for him_. This isn't about the Arrow, Felicity, it's about  _us_.  _Our relationship_.  _Trust_. After I figured it out, I rationalized your silence. I tried to be understanding. You didn't know me well enough, you needed time. So I tried to show you in every way I knew how that you could trust me, that you could share that part of your life with me. But you were never going to tell me, were you?" He sounded so hurt, so angry.

She swiped miserably at a stray tear that trickled down her cheek. How could she make him understand that telling him would have broken a promise she'd made to someone else? "Probably not," she admitted.

"Tell me why," he pleaded.

 _I wish I could._ Another tear plopped onto her cheek. "I'm sorry, Adam. I don't know what else to say."

He ran a weary hand across his face and her heart went out to him. He was a good man and she'd hurt him. She hadn't meant to, but it had been inevitable. Sooner or later they would have reached this point. She'd just never imagined it would possibly be this painful. "I should go," he said, picking up his belongings.

"Can I call you later?" Felicity asked hopefully. "We need to talk."

Slowly Adam shook his head. "I think it's best if you didn't. There isn't much else to say, is there?"

Felicity's heart sank to the floor as she absorbed the undeniable truth. He was breaking up with her. The knowledge knocked the breath from her, making her lightheaded. She swayed slightly and instantly Adam was here, his arm steadying her. "Felicity?" he asked, his handsome face filled with concern.

"I'm fine, thank you." They stared at each other, her eyes absorbing the tinge of sorrow that marred his otherwise handsome face. Unconsciously, he raised a hand and traced the curve of her cheek gently. The gesture was so sweet she leaned into his touch, desperately wanting to make him stay. "Adam-"

His voice low and filled with anguish, he whispered, "Take care of yourself, Felicity." And then he was gone.

After she could no longer hear his footsteps on the tiled floor, Felicity crumpled down into the nearest seat and dropped her face into her hands. The man she loved had walked out on her and she couldn't even blame him. Whoever had said that you could have everything in life had clearly never been in her predicament.

* * *

 

"You seem distracted," Sara said. "That's the third time I've knocked you down…and I wasn't even trying."

Oliver looked up from his vantage point on the floor. She was right, he was distracted. Usually he didn't find himself flat on his back more than once, if at all, when they sparred. Flopping down beside him, she extended a hand towards him and pulled him into a sitting position. "Sorry," he said.

"What's going on?" she asked, wiping a bead of sweat off her forehead.

Oliver looked at her, not at all sure she'd appreciate knowing the truth. "Nothing to worry about."

She raised an eyebrow. "Ollie, spit it out."

"Sara, I don't want to hurt you."

"Felicity," she replied knowingly. There was no reproach in her voice.

Taken aback, he asked, "How did you know that?"

Rolling her eyes, Sara grabbed the bottle of water beside her and took a swig. "I'm not blind. I could see this coming a mile off and never understood why neither of you could."

"I didn't break up with you-"

Lifting a hand she halted him. "I never thought you did."

Relieved, he accepted the bottle she offered him and drank deeply.

"You love her," she stated bluntly.

Oliver sputtered and coughed. "No subtlety, I see."

She laughed. "You know me, that's not my style. I cut to the chase." She watched him. "Well?"

"I don't know what you want me to say," he responded frankly.

"I want you to tell me the truth."

He sighed. He had never been good at keeping things from Sara. She knew him too well. "Yes," he admitted, looking her straight in the eye. "I do love her." A little uncomfortable, he attempted to explain, "Sara-"

"No, no. Please don't apologise," she assured him, touching his arm. "I meant it when I said that I wanted us to be friends and as your friend, I also want you to be happy. My feelings aren't hurt. " She smiled. "Have you told her how you feel?"

He shook his head. "She's dating someone else. It's not right that I ruin that for her. Not after all I've put her through." Felicity deserved to be happy and if that wasn't with him, as much as it hurt, he'd learn to make peace with it.

Sara was looking at him strangely. "You've changed."

Feeling self-conscious, he shrugged, not commenting.

"The old Ollie would have taken what he wanted and not cared about the people standing in his way."

He felt ashamed to hear her say that. "Maybe that's not how I want to be anymore."

"I'm glad," she replied, softly. "You know, if I met someone who made me want to be a better person and became the catalyst that drove me towards that goal, I wouldn't let him go."

"I don't have a choice, Sara," Oliver said with resignation.

She huffed. "Since when? I'm not telling you to steal her away, I'm telling you to let her know she's got options."

Annoyed, he replied. "It's not that simple."

Sara was silent for a moment. "There's something else," she said intuitively, watching him closely.

Squirming a little under the intensity of her scrutiny, Oliver nodded. "Is it even possible to be in a relationship when we do the work we do?

She looked at him thoughtfully. "You mean a  _real_ relationship? The love and commitment type?"

"Sara-" he started apologetically.

Shaking her head to stop him, she continued, "I'm sure it must be really hard. More than ever you need to be able to compartmentalize, to keep the personal and the professional separate. Unfortunately, lives may depend on it."

That was Oliver's exact fear. Just an hour ago he'd almost let a dangerous criminal get the better of him because he'd been so distracted by his current emotional upheaval. His head hadn't been completely in the game and that was not a luxury he could afford. He'd been lucky that he'd managed to salvage things in the knick of time and nothing serious had happened as a result of his pre-occupation, but it could so easily have gone horribly wrong. He couldn't pretend that he wasn't afraid that it might happen again and next time, the consequences could be devastating.

"I worry about that," he replied, honestly, verbalizing for the first time what he couldn't deny was a genuine concern.

"Is this because of what happened earlier?"

He nodded. "You just admitted I wasn't focused."

"It happens sometimes," she replied, shrugging.

Oliver gave her a look of disbelief. " _It never happens to me_."

"Look, I know you love Felicity and so it's natural to want to pursue that. There's nothing wrong with feeling that way." Sara took another swig of water. "There is no book of vigilante rules that says you can't be a crime fighter by night and a dedicated boyfriend by day. However, the challenge lies in being able to manage both relationships without one or the other suffering." She paused. "Can you do that?"

"Today I definitely didn't," he admitted. "These past few weeks I've had so much going on. I know things are slipping _. I'm_  slipping."

She touched his arm. "Hey, don't be so hard on yourself."

Frustrated, he stood. "I can't take it easy either, Sara. What we do…it's important. I can't afford to enter a fray when I'm not 100% focused on the job."

Moving to stand beside him she asked, "So what are you saying?"

Sighing he pinched the bridge of his nose. "That maybe I've been deluding myself. Maybe being with Felicity, or anyone for that matter, isn't even an option right now."

"Come on, Ollie. It was one incident. Nothing happened. Don't start making irrational decisions based on something that may never happen again."

"And if it does?" he asked, vehemently. "Could I live with that? Knowing it was my own selfish desires that put the lives of innocents at risk?"

"So what's the alternative? You spend forever alone? That's no way to live," she reminded him gently.

"This was my choice, Sara." He pointed to his green suit. "Donning that mask was a conscious decision I made. I don't just get to give that up, I  _can't_. I have a responsibility that I cannot take lightly. This city needs me."

Sara looked at him sadly. "And what about Felicity?"

Oliver's shoulders drooped. "She's with Donner and despite my personal feelings towards the man, he cares about her. She could do a lot worse."

"Wait a minute. Why does it sound as though you've already made up your mind about this?" She poked him in the chest. "Are you giving up?"

He turned away from her, not wanting her to see his pain. "Honestly, I don't know."


	29. Chapter 29

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapters 28-30 is the alternate Alicity ending.

 

Walking into the foundry, Felicity found Oliver hanging from his salmon ladder. Usually, the sight of his sweat socked, muscular back would have stopped her dead in her tracks. However, at that moment, she was too distracted to pay him anything but a cursory glance.  _Adam._  It hurt to think of him. She wished she could tell him the truth, make him understand, but that wasn't going to happen. It wasn't her place and she'd never be disloyal to Oliver, regardless of the consequences.

_Oliver._ She cared about him too. She wasn't in denial about it anymore. But now that she knew for certain how she felt about Adam, what had a few hours ago felt like the biggest choice she'd ever have to make – which man she cared about more – seemed less significant when one of them had already walked away, and in doing so, made her realize just how deeply she cared about him.

Looking up when she heard Oliver grunt, she watched as he propelled himself upward still, just hanging there for a moment, the muscles of his back tensed and coiled. He had a beautiful body. There were many times when she'd been unable to stop herself from watching him, not even caring that she wasn't being particularly discreet about it. Then later, she'd grown to resent his physicality and her weakness to it. Shutting off that side of her, she'd stopped paying attention to him, preferring to keep her mind concentrated on work. Staring at him now, she still thought him ridiculously attractive, but the edge of allure she'd always felt was somewhat diminished. It was as though she was looking at him through a filter. He was still there, perfectly flawed, but she had no desire to rip away the layers between them to get any closer. It was the strangest thing. Before, when Adam had been an option, she'd been so consumed by her feelings for Oliver, worried about when she'd have to choose. Now that he was no longer in her life, those same feelings seemed to have faded significantly leaving a gaping hole inside of her. Perhaps the old adage was true after all – you only realize the value of something, in her case _someone_ , when they were no longer around.

"Hey," she called, walking past him.

Oliver glanced down before making his descent. Within seconds his feet touched the ground. "How's Adam? I saw the reports on the news."

Turning towards him, her heart in her throat, she forced herself to stay focused on his face. "Not too good, I'm afraid. He's taken the news really badly."

Clearly he'd noted her red-rimmed eyes. His face clouded with concern. "Felicity, what happened?"

Turning away from him she dumped her purse on her desk. "We, uh, broke up." At Oliver's silence, she continued, "He found out that I work for you. Well, not  _you_ , the Arrow. Naturally, he was upset that I lied to him."

She felt the heat of Oliver's hand on her shoulder and she squeezed her eyes shut to stop herself from giving in to the overwhelming desire to cry.

"I'm sorry."

Nodding, she sniffed loudly. "It was bound to happen, right? I mean, sooner or later I would have had to break things off with him. I guess this way saves us both the emotional rollercoaster." Even to her own ears she didn't sound convincing.

"You don't have to pretend with me," Oliver said gently.

Felicity plastered a false smile on her face. "Hey, it's okay. I'm okay."

Oliver just stared at her, not speaking. Fidgeting with her hands, Felicity couldn't think of anything to say that would fill the awkward silence. Slowly, Oliver moved forward and embraced her. The comfort he offered was too much for her to resist and the fragile hold she had on her emotions broke apart. Stepping into his arms, she placed her head on his shoulder and cried.

* * *

 

Oliver didn't know how long he stood there holding her. It felt like mere minutes, the moment when he needed to let her go coming all too soon, but it could well have been a substantial amount of time. Eventually when her tears subsided Felicity pulled back and he pushed the wet strands of hair that clung to her cheeks away from her face. Her skin was pink and blotchy, her eyes red and swollen. She'd never been more perfect...and she was crying over the loss of another man.

The truth hurt.

"Feeling better?"

She nodded. "A bit. Thanks."

He gave her a small smile. She didn't look any better and his heart twisted agonizingly. A couple of hours ago the news would have had him rejoicing, but after the day's events and his talk with Sara, it felt as though everything had changed.

"I'm sorry that your involvement with me is causing you so much pain."

Felicity gave him a watery smile. "It's not your fault, Oliver. It's not even really about you. Adam feels that I betrayed his trust."

His conscience prickled. "So technically it  _is_  about me."

"No-"

He sighed. Always so loyal. "Felicity, you wouldn't have had to lie to him if you weren't protecting me."

"Oliver, I don't regret being a part of this team and I'm not ashamed of it. I'm proud of the work we do. I just-I'm just sorry that Adam got hurt. He doesn't deserve it."

Watching the play of emotions across her face, it struck him that he'd never seen her this upset before. In all the time they'd known each other, this was the only occasion he'd seen her this vulnerable.

"Are you in love with him?" He had to know.

His question was clearly a surprise judging by her involuntary gasp and the way her eyes widened. But he saw it, the flash of guilt.

"Oliver-"

Turning his back to her, he reached for his towel. "So, you do."

"I didn't realize it until earlier," Felicity replied ruefully. "Now I'm standing here and I don't know why I feel the need to apologise to you."

Oliver did. Something had been happening between them and while neither of them wanted to delve into it, how she felt about Adam changed things. Heck, his own realization about his inability to maintain a relationship changed things. The truth was, if he selfishly pursued Felicity, this could well be how things between them would end up: her miserable and unfulfilled with always coming up second and him constantly feeling guilty about being torn between love and duty.

This life had been his choice and he couldn't walk away from it. He wasn't ready to. Ultimately, there was no decision to make because deep down he'd always known the answer. So maybe it was time he put them both at ease.

"Do you remember what I once told you about how I couldn't ever be with someone that I truly cared about?"

Felicity folded her arms across her chest. "I remember."

 _This is hard._  "I meant it. Today I nearly sabotaged what should have been an easy take-down because I was…distracted." The look in her eyes said she understood his meaning. "I can't risk that happening again."

She studied him for a moment. "I know."

And she did. He knew she did.

Moving towards him Felicity stood on her toes and planted a soft, chaste kiss on his lips. Oliver gathered her close again, his face burrowing into her hair. He closed his eyes as both of them poured everything they could never say into the embrace, determined that it would be sufficient. A lump formed in his throat when he looked at her one last time before taking a step back.  _Enough._

"We'll go after the judge."

Taking her cue from him Felicity turned towards her computer terminal. "I was thinking the same thing. Although Adam's chance at prosecuting Perez may be gone forever."

Oliver threw his towel into a nearby basket before reaching for his shirt. "Not if I can help it. Are you up to a little digging?"

Her fingers were already flying across the keys. "On it."

"I want to know what Perez has on him."

Satisfied, Oliver turned to leave just as Felicity caught his hand. Staring down at her small fingers holding onto his, he looked up and met her eyes. "Thank you."

With a gentle squeeze, he replied, "It's what we do, Felicity."

He loved her, but there were things in his life that he knew he could never turn his back on and she deserved so much more than that. She wasn't meant to wait in the wings until the right time came along. Especially when he wasn't sure that it ever would.

With a heavy, yet resolute heart, Oliver turned away from certain happiness and back towards the life he was destined to lead.

* * *

 

It had not been an easy decision, and if anyone had told Oliver a week prior that he'd be standing on Adam Donner's doorstep, he'd have laughed in their faces. And yet there he was, knocking on the door of the DA's home, not at all sure if he was doing the right thing. After he'd seen Felicity's brave attempts to mask her misery he'd realized how much she loved the other man and how much she was sacrificing in order to protect his secret. He'd never known anyone as loyal as her and he'd never forget her willingness to give up her own chance at happiness because she believed in him. Perhaps it was time that he returned the favour and did a little sacrificing of his own.

The door opened and it was obvious that the DA was as surprised to see him as he was to be there. If his looks were anything to go by, his eyes red and slightly swollen (from lack of sleep was Oliver's guess), his face lined and weary, the other man was in as bad a shape as Felicity. Despite their differences, he couldn't stop the pang of sympathy he felt as he looked at his former rival.

"You're the very last person I expected to find on my doorstep," Adam remarked.

Oliver shrugged. "Believe me, you almost didn't."

Stepping aside, Adam gestured for him to enter. He walked ahead and Oliver followed, not sure what else to do and feeling more than a little uncomfortable. When they reached the kitchen, Adam picked up the mug he must have set down when answering to the door.

"Coffee?"

They were both being so polite. "No, thanks."

"Then I suppose you should let me know why you're here." They stood facing one another.

Oliver took a deep breath. "It's about Felicity."

He didn't miss the look of pain that flashed across the other man's face before his mask descended. "Felicity and I are not up for discussion." Adam turned and threw his coffee down the drain.

"I beg to differ. She's-"

"Your employee," Adam interjected. "I don't think your being here is particularly appropriate."

Oliver ground his teeth and tried to remain calm.  _This is for her_. "She loves you, Donner."

This time his face gave nothing away. Clearly the DA had an excellent poker face. "How is this any of your business?" he deflected.

 _Fair question_. "Because other than being my employee, she's also my friend and I don't like to see my friends in pain."

Adam shoved his hands into the pockets of his navy trousers. Anyone else might not have noticed the slight softening of his features, but to Oliver's trained eye, it was unmistakable. "How is she?"

"As bad as you are."

He raised an eyebrow. "You don't know me."

Oliver shrugged. "I don't need to, but Felicity keeps telling me what a great guy you are and since I trust her judgment, I guess I have to believe her."

Adam turned from him and walked over to the expanse of windows that showcased an impressive vista of the city. "Why are you here, Oliver?"

This was his moment to back out, to turn around and head out that door and never look back. If he continued, he'd be fully committing to finishing what he started. "To explain."

Frowning, Adam glanced at him. "Look, Felicity and I broke up because of reasons I can't explain nor want to-"

"I know why," Oliver interrupted.

For a moment Oliver relished the shock that registered on the other man's face. "So you know who she also works for?" Adam asked in disbelief.

Oliver nodded.

"Great!" he exclaimed sarcastically, throwing his hands up in the air. "Then I'm the only one she didn't tell."

"There were reasons," Oliver replied calmly, moving to stand beside the man Felicity loved.

Adam scoffed. "None of which I'm aware of."

"I'd be willing to shed some light, but first I need to know something." Folding his arms across his chest, he waited.

Expectantly, Adam countered, "What?"

"How do you feel about her?"

The other man's face hardened. "You don't expect me to answer that, do you?"

Oliver shifted slightly. "I wouldn't have asked if I didn't."

"You're wasting my time." Adam gestured toward the door. "You know your way out."

"Just answer the question, Donner!"

Annoyed, Adam's voice rose. "Get out!"

"Tell me how you feel about her," Oliver persisted.

"I said-"

Some of Oliver's patience flew out the window. "Tell me!"

Again, no one else might have noticed the flare of pain that warred with Adam's obvious irritation.  _He loves her._  It was all the confirmation Oliver needed.

 _Here goes._  "Because of me," he said quietly.

"What?" came the confused retort.

Oliver reiterated, "She didn't tell you why because of me."

"You?" Adam echoed in confusion. "But why would yo-" Oliver recognized the exact moment when the DA made the connection. "It's you.  _You're_  the Arrow."

Oliver couldn't believe he was doing this. It was a plan that could backfire in a bad way, but he trusted Felicity and she loved and trusted Adam. He needed to remember that.

"Felicity and I have been working together for a while now. She didn't tell you because it would have betrayed her promise to me. It wasn't because  _she didn't want to_ , but rather because  _she couldn't_."

* * *

 

Adam's mind was reeling. Suddenly everything made perfect sense: Oliver's arrival back from the dead, the Arrow's appearance in Starling City, Felicity's ability to work at Queen Consolidated and for the vigilante – naturally that would only work if they were one and the same thing. How had he missed that? Granted, Oliver Queen wouldn't have been his first pick, but it was actually rather obvious.

"I should have you arrested!" he threatened. All this time, the vigilante had been right under his nose and he hadn't known it.

He saw the other man's jaw tighten. "I would strongly advise you against it."

"You kill people," Adam asserted, watching as Oliver flinched. "You run around this city dispatching justice as you see fit. People could get hurt in your quest for heroics!"

"That is not what this is about!" Oliver exclaimed, his voice low and deceptively calm. "I didn't set out to become…what I am." Restless, he started pacing. "When I got back from that island, let's just say that there was a lot going on and this city….it had become infected by something festering and evil and that disease was bleeding into all quarters. I saw an opportunity to set things right, or at least to try-"

"By making yourself judge, jury and executioner?" Adam interrupted. Despite his skepticism about the Arrow and his motives, Adam couldn't deny that he was curious to know what his motivations were. A muscle twitched in Oliver's cheek, a sign that his barb had hit its mark.

"You're right. In the beginning, I didn't care about the rights of those I took down. But that changed."

Adam indulged him. "Why?"

Oliver shrugged, clearly ill at ease with having to explain himself. "Multiple factors actually. Tommy Merlyn's death being one of them. Also, Felicity."

Adam was momentarily on the back foot. "Felicity?"

"She made me realize that I didn't need to become like those men I took down in order to bring them to justice. I could catch them and leave them to men like you and Detective Lance, trusting that you would do the right thing."

Adam shook his head. This was madness. "You can't keep running around this city playing hero, Oliver. That's why we have law enforcement, a justice system."

"And where was that system last week when Perez walked away a free man because one of your own started batting for the other side?" Oliver fired back. "How's that just?" Adam hated that he had a point, that the other man's words pierced through his moral defense. "I can help you, Adam. If we worked together, there isn't a criminal in this city that would escape the clutches of the law – a system you are so determined to uphold."

Adam ran a hand across his head, doubt and frustration causing a headache to throb at his temples. "This is crazy.  _You're_ crazy." He reached for his mobile on the kitchen counter.

"If the law wasn't as fractured and corrupt as it clearly is, there wouldn't be a need for someone like me," Oliver continued, unrelenting. His words made Adam pause. "Despite what you may think of my methods – which has improved over time - I get the job done. Something those guys pushing paper in your precincts aren't capable of because they're too busy counting the cash they get from bribes. Open your eyes, Donner! You know Felicity. Would she align herself with something she fundamentally believed to be morally corrupt?"

And there it was, the one question Adam been asking himself over and over since he'd found out about Felicity's involvement with the Arrow. She was the smartest, funniest, most open-hearted person he'd ever met. From the second he'd seen her at Big Belly, he'd been smitten. The realization that she'd been keeping a secret that was so important from him, had been a blow he hadn't seen coming. The truth was, he missed her, every day. He missed her laughter, the sweet smell of her skin when he held her close, the way she sighed when he kissed her lips. He missed everything about her and it was driving him nuts. Despite what had happened between them, he didn't believe her to be a bad person, or one that could be easily fooled or swayed. If she worked for the Arrow, it was because it was a decision her conscience could live with.

"No," he admitted. "I don't."

Oliver visibly relaxed. "Look, I know you're not a fan of my way of operating, but you can't deny that it's working. We don't have to be on opposing sides of the fence, Donner. If you let me help you, we can get Perez behind bars."

The offer was tempting. Especially after the fruitless week he'd spent trying to clean up Judge Thompson's mess. Working the case by the book meant that his hands were officially tied and it stung. He hated the thought of both Thompson and Perez getting off scot-free.

"Hypothetically speaking, if I agreed to this, how would you do it?"

"We'd find out what Perez has on Thompson. Felicity didn't factor a corrupt judge into the intel she initially fed you-"

Adam's mind reeled for the umpteenth time. "Wait. That was her work?" The case files and information related to Perez and his illegal activities had been thorough, impressive work.

"All of it. She spent nights making sure she wouldn't let you down."

Guilt seeped into his conscience. "So you and your…team…would bring him in?"

"We would," Oliver vowed. "The rest would be up to you."

This was all too much. He needed to think. "I don't know what to say. This is not what I was expecting when you walked through my front door." At best, Adam had assumed that something had happened involving Moira Queen.

Oliver nodded. "I know it's a lot to process so I'll go. For now." He turned and then hesitated. "Can I trust you?" His eyes were narrowed, probing.

Adam's nod was short and clipped. He wasn't planning on turning him in. At least not yet. He had some homework to do. Acknowledging his assurance, Oliver walked to the door and opened it.

A thought struck and Adam halted him. "You took a massive risk coming here. Why?"

Oliver was halfway out, his hand suddenly gripping the doorknob with undue force. "I've already told you."

Adam shook his head. He didn't buy that. "That's not all."

"It's enough." Oliver made another move to exit.

"Does Felicity know you're here?" Adam asked curiously.

Again, the unmistakable tension. "She doesn't."

"Are you telling me that you risked-" Realisation dawned. "You're in love with her," Adam said, astonished.

"Don't look for things that aren't there, Donner," Oliver denied.

Adam ignored him. "If you love her, why aren't you pursuing her?"

"I just told-"

Irritated, he shook his head. "Cut the BS, will you?"

Oliver sighed audibly. He took his time, but eventually he confessed, "Because she loves you."

It was in that moment that Adam realized how much Oliver loved Felicity. The risk he was taking in exposing himself was testament to that fact. He couldn't suppress the grudging respect that pushed to the fore.

"Thanks, by the way," he said, explaining when Oliver cast him another questioning glance. "For saving my life."

His shoulders relaxing, the other man smiled faintly. "Talk to Felicity. That's all the thanks I need."

A long time later, Adam was still staring out at the city, his mind replaying the scene that had unfolded a few hours before. Oliver Queen was the Starling City vigilante, leaving corrupt men all over the city for the police to apprehend. Most times Adam was the man prosecuting them. How was Oliver's offer so different from what had been happening all along? The only difference now was that he finally knew the man behind the mask.

 _Felicity._  He shouldn't have walked out on her. He should have known she wouldn't lie to him unless she felt she didn't have a choice. His heart beat faster when he recalled Oliver's words:  _She loves you, Donner._ Could it be true? Heaven help him, he loved her and if the past week had been any indication, his feelings weren't diminishing. If anything, each passing day brought with it more misery, more loneliness and a greater sense of loss.

He rubbed a hand across his throbbing temples. Was it possible that he'd been wrong about the Arrow and his motives? Maybe there was more to Oliver Queen's breed of justice than he'd ever considered? Could he accept that maybe, just maybe, they were all fighting for the same side?

Adam had a lot to think about.


	30. Chapter 30

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Chapters 28-30 is the alternate Alicity ending.

 

It had been two weeks since Felicity had last seen or heard from Adam. Two long weeks in which she'd tried to bury her head in work and pretend that he didn't exist. It was hard though, especially when she missed him so much at times that it was hard to breathe. But life had a way of forcing you to move forward, even when every step seemed to hurt more than the one before.

Intel on Judge Thompson's connection to Perez had been slow in coming, but she'd finally cracked it the day before. Thompson's penchant for gambling had resulted in the loss of his family's financial security. Hoping to regain some lost footing, the judge had agreed to turn a blind eye to one of Perez's drug operations and cashed in big time. He'd been naïve though, and once was all it took to ensure that he'd never escape the king pin's clutches. Perez owned him. There would be no escape.

Glancing at the clock, Felicity started the familiar routine of shutting down her computer and gathering her belongings. It was still early, but it would probably be better if she made her way to the foundry; there were still lots of preparation to be done. The plan was to catch Thompson and get him to give up Perez.

Reaching for her company access card, Felicity stood. She was about to grab her handbag when she heard footsteps behind her. Turning, she froze.

It was Adam. Impeccable as always in a navy blue suit, his shirt was a crisp white, his tie matching pinstripes of blue and grey. His beautiful blue eyes, a permanent fixture in her dreams of late, were focused intently on her. 

Just seeing him caused all of the feelings of longing and loneliness she'd pushed aside to come rushing to the fore. She'd missed him. In truth, she hadn't thought she'd ever see him again and now there he was, right in front of her. She wasn't prepared for it. Her heart started pounding, her palms grew slightly clammy. What was he doing there?

"H-hi," she said uncertainly, running her hands nervously down the front of her short, black and white print dress.

"Hey," he replied, his gaze never leaving hers as he stopped a few paces from her.

He was close enough that she could see the laugh lines bracketing his eyes, smell the faint trace of his cologne. She itched to touch him, wanting to run her fingers through his light brown hair, smooth her hands over his broad shoulders. Since she obviously couldn't do that, she clenched her fists in order to quell the impulse.

"What are you doing here?" she asked, her eyes continuing to drink him in. He looked tired.

"How are you?" Adam deflected, his voice low.

Felicity swallowed. How was she supposed to answer that question? She'd convinced herself that they were over, that he probably hated her, that she'd never see him again. She was miserable. However, "okay," seemed like the safest response. "You?"

He grimaced. "Not too great, actually."

They stared at one another. "Why?"

Adam started to say something and then hesitated. "I know that you were the one who gathered all the Perez intel for me. I never thanked you."

Felicity frowned. That wasn't what he'd been about to say. "You came all this way to thank me?"

"Are you sorry that I did?" he asked softly.

She was confused. "Adam, you're not making any sense. The last time we spoke you broke up with me," her voice cracked slightly. "Now you're here,  _thanking_  me, and I can't figure out why. Nothing's changed."

His calm demeanour shifted for a second and his eyes filled with remorse. "I said some pretty bad things to you."

Felicity shook her head. "I get it. You don't have to explain." She turned away from him, picking up her access disc and placing it into her purse. It hurt to look at him.

"Yes, Felicity, I do." He'd moved closer. She could feel him behind her, the heat of his body permeating into hers. For a moment she closed her eyes, luxuriating in his nearness. "Oliver came to see me," he said.

Shocked and wide eyed, she whirled round to look at him, her ponytail brushing back and forth against her neck. "What?" she breathed. "Why?"

"I  _know_ ," he said. Felicity reached for her desk, her knees suddenly a little unsteady. _  
_

"He told you…" she hesitated, unable to finish her sentence. Then she held up a finger. "What _exactly_  did he tell you?"

Adam looked her straight in the eye. "That he was the vigilante."

Glad to have her workstation behind her, Felicity sagged against it for support. Oliver guarded his secret heavily. The only reason he'd volunteer the information was if he felt that he had no other choice. Her mind was reeling. "When did this happen?"

"A couple of days after we broke up." Adam looked slightly bewildered. "I should have put it together myself. I don't know why I never did." When her mouth moved, but no sound was forthcoming, he smiled faintly. "You must really be surprised if you're rendered speechless."

Felicity felt her cheeks warm. "It was the last thing I expected you to say," she confessed.  _Why didn't Oliver tell me?_

Adam's voice gentled. "I'm sorry about what I said to you. I now realise why you couldn't tell me. Loyalty is hard to come by these days and I admire yours."

His words weaved a path straight to her heart, a sprig of hope sprouting.

A thought struck and Felicity stood up straight. Even in heels, the top of her head only reached the underside of Adam's jaw. "Wait a minute. If you've known for more than week, why hasn't Oliver been arrested?"

He shoved his hands into his pockets and regarded her thoughtfully. "Believe me, that very nearly happened."

She swallowed. "What changed your mind?"

"You."

Her mouth dropped open. "Me?" she echoed in disbelief.

"Oliver knocked a few home truths into me and once I looked past my own anger, I realised that he was right."

Felicity gaped at him, unable to believe what he was saying. "You  _agree_  with Oliver?"

Adam's mouth curled into a smile and her heart lurched in her chest. How could one man be so handsome? "We had a long talk and he said some things that made me stop and think."

Felicity narrowed her eyes at him. "Such as?"

"The fact that I cannot view what he does in terms of black and white, that there's a lot more to consider." He stepped closer, his voice dropping a few octaves. She could touch him so easily...all she had to do was lift her hand. "That you wouldn't align yourself to a cause you didn't believe was moral and just." Adam lifted a finger and trailed it down the side of her cheek. "Of all the things he said that night Felicity, those are the words that haunted me the most."

The sprig of hope started to bloom in her belly. "I wanted to tell you Adam, so many times."

He cupped her cheeks and she lifted her hands, curling her fingers around his wrists. "I know."

"What are you saying?" she asked, desperately wanting to know what all this meant.

"That Oliver made me see a few things differently." He let her go and stepped away, walking towards the windows. "All my life I believed in a system, a code. I thought that if I followed it to the letter, that the righteous side would always be victorious. I disliked what Oliver did because I believed that it gave others authorization to take the law into their own hands, for chaos to ensue." He turned back, his gaze unwavering. "It took what happened with Judge Thompson for me to realise that things aren't always that simple, that there are always exceptions to every rule, that just because I want things to be a certain way, won't necessarily make them so."

Felicity moved away from her desk and approached him. "I'm sorry about what happened at the hearing. If it makes you feel any better, I found out why Thompson did what he did." She gave him the run down.

Adam shook his head in disgust. "I thought I knew him."

"What happened was not your fault," Felicity insisted, touching his arm.

He stared down at her, his eyes softening. "I know. I just wish that things had turned out differently."

Adam looked down to where her hand rested on his arm and Felicity self-consciously removed it. "Well, we have enough to send Thompson away for a long time. Perez too." She paused. "That is if you'd be willing to prosecute them with Oliver's help."

He took a deep breath and then to her complete and utter surprise, he nodded. "I would."

Felicity was astonished. She hadn't known what to expect when she'd seen Adam, but this most certainly hadn't been it. "I think the two of you would make a surprisingly good team. You might even learn to like one another."

Adam laughed and Felicity was reminded about how much she'd missed the sound. "I don't know about that, but I think we could be effective, if nothing else."

"Then you'd be willing to try?" she asked, feeling hopeful.

He smiled and she exhaled, not having realised she'd been holding her breath. "I'm glad." This, of course meant that she'd probably be seeing more of him. Or least she'd be in regular contact with him. Her heart squeezed tightly. Happy as she was to know that Adam was on their side, she was sad for herself. He'd be so close to her, but ultimately so far away. "So I guess I'll be seeing you around."

It was Adam's turn to frown. "What do you mean?"

"Well, you're going to be collaborating with Oliver," she explained. "I assume that means that we'll cross paths from time to time."

Unexpectedly, Adam reached out and tugged her against him. Felicity's eyes widened when her body collided with his. They were sandwiched together from navel to knees, her skin tingling everywhere they touched. His muscled arms locked behind her back, holding her firmly. "I don't want to just cross paths with you, Felicity," he whispered, his mouth tantalisingly close to hers.

She couldn't breathe, hypnotised by the sound of his voice and the heat in his eyes. "You don't?" she squeaked.

He shook his head, staring at her intently. "I want to be with you, if you'll have me back."

Felicity trembled, unable to believe what she was hearing.

"You see," Adam said, brushing a strand hair gently behind her ear. "I've been a first class ass and the truth is that I don't deserve you. I should never have doubted who you are and what you believe in. All I can do is promise you that it won't happen again and that if you give me another chance, I'll do my best to make it up to you."

"Adam-"

"Oliver told me something else," he said, interrupting.

"What?" There couldn't possibly be anything else.

He leaned down, brushing his lips lightly against hers and she shivered. "That you loved me," he said softly. "Is that true?"

Felicity stared at him, knowing that it was now or never. From the moment she'd met Adam at Big Belly she'd felt a connection to him. Then as they'd gotten to know one another, that connection had only grown stronger - deepening, solidifying, intensifying. He was everything she'd ever wanted and so much more and he was a hairsbreadth away from being hers. "Yes it is," she replied sincerely. "I love you, Adam."

His eyes closed, as though he were savouring the words. She'd always imagined that saying it would be hard, but in the end, it had been the easiest part.

Adam's lips swooped down to meet hers, his hands cupping her cheeks, holding her head steady. The kiss was soft initially, then deepened by increments until they were both breathing raggedly, straining to get closer to one another.

Felicity whimpered in protest when he finally raised his lips from hers. "I love you," he said simply.

She sagged against him, the sweetest relief coursing through her body. "I was so scared that I'd never see you again," she confessed, placing a soft kiss on his jaw.

He hugged her close. "When Oliver came to see me, the last thing I expected was for him to end up convincing me that we could actually work together. But he really blew me away when he told me how you felt about me. I'm sorry for being such a fool-"

Felicity placed a finger across his lips. "You don't have to apologise anymore. Your reaction was completely understandable. If I'd been in your position, I would probably have felt exactly the same way."

They kissed again, hands and mouths conveying what words no longer could.

When Adam drew back, Felicity's eyes searched his.

"What is it?"

She shook her head. "Nothing. I just…I can't believe that Oliver told you. He doesn't tell anyone."

Adam smiled. "He did it for you, Felicity. Because he cares about you."

The thought made her emotional. She thought about all that she and Oliver been through, about the feelings she had for him, that she would always have for him. What he'd done for her meant everything to her. He'd risked so much so that she'd have a shot at happiness. Oliver had come such a long way from the man she'd met three years ago. She liked to believe that the positive changes he'd made in his life, was in part, as a result of their friendship.

"I want you to know something else," Adam said, holding her tightly against him, his tone suddenly serious. "Oliver's confession merely pre-empted things. I want you to know that while it may have taken me a little longer to figure things out, I would have eventually come to my senses and made things right between us."

Relief made Felicity feel lighter than she had since they'd fallen out. "I'm glad to hear it, Donner."

Adam grinned. "So, Miss Smoak, what happens next?" he asked, his hands settling comfortably on her hips.

She wound her arms around his neck, cocking her head playfully to the side as she regarded him with twinkling eyes. "I'm not sure. Any ideas?"

"I have a few," he replied suggestively, his lips nuzzling the sensitive skin behind her ear. "I'm thinking that you might like to see the…err…view from my bedroom."

A little breathless, Felicity grinned, excitement pooling in her belly. "The view?"

Adam's lips twitched. "It is spectacular."

She leaned forward, bringing their lips into close proximity, a riot of butterflies fluttering in her stomach. "You have such excellent ideas."

"I do try." Adam laughed before his head bent, his lips capturing hers in a lingering kiss.

Felicity sighed happily as she gave herself up to the wonderful sensation of loving and being loved in turn. Because of Oliver, she had everything she'd ever wanted. Adam was hers and more importantly, there were no more secrets between them. Considering the double life that Oliver led as playboy by day and Starling City's hero by night, choosing to give her a shot at love instead of protecting his own interests was the most selfless thing that anyone had ever done for her. There were no words she could think of that would ever adequately convey her gratitude.

They would have to talk, but not right now. Now, was all about her and Adam and the promise of a happy future together.

**THE END**


End file.
